So, DH and I had our first anniversary. There was a little confusion to some people as to what day it was (on the license date or the wedding day?? We chose the date on our license). But MIL was always in the know, as she’s the one who informed me that we were technically already married a few days before the wedding day (which really was just a fancy dinner, vows were spoken on the license day at a registration).
Anyways. Our anniversary comes up, and we’re spending the day together. However, MIL keeps calling over petty nothings (not unusual) and asks DH a favor… DH says today’s my anniversary, so I’ll do it tomorrow. To which she just says “ok we’ll make sure you stop by your parents on your bday”. I found it off because she’s the type that will congratulate plenty for things like that.
Anyways, time passes, we eat out, and I decide, out of fairness, I’ll send her a picture of us on our dinner that I sent to other various well-wishing family members. She congratulated me and says she thought it was the 8th, to which I just say thanks and don’t argue. But, not even a heartbeat later, DH received this angry text “Congratulations on your anniversary (DH’s name) but I just found it from (OP’s name) that it’s today and not the 8th”. Like he’s supposed to apologize? Offer explanation? Like it truly matters to her what day we celebrate? Anyways he exaplains the concept to her and tells her that he did tell her on the phone, to which she doesn’t respond.
We went over for his bday a few days later, and nothing was said on the matter which is so odd given the type of person she is. Generally she’d gush and say she’s so happy. Today is the day of the wedding day. I receive a text, a picture of DH and I, with “Happy Anniversary❤️“ from MIL. It agitates me because we made it very clear what day and it’s like she’s just trying to coax me into arguing with her or just letting her pick the day and control it. I haven’t responded. I’m not sure to respond if at all. She does this type of thing where she just ignores your wishes and gaslights you into what she wants and it just irks me that it seems she’s trying make DH and I conform into that for our anniversary. What should I say?