I need a white lie to see if they'll keep a secret

[Louisewilliams94]

I want to say something gossip worthy to see if they'll keep it a secret, before revealing my bigger secret but I'm really stumped what to tell them. Can you help me please ?

Sounds too much like primary school aged game playing to me.

I kind of think, if you're not sure someone can keep a confidence, better not to tell them anything important.

No. That just sounds really childish.

Tell them you have piles

You are getting a huge tattoo at the week end. Or a private piercing..

How will you know if they kept it secret or not?

How old are you 12?

If you don't trust them don't tell them simple.

You won't know if they keep it secret.
Even if they do, it doesn't mean they would keep the bigger thing secret.
If you don't trust them, don't tell them.
How would you feel if someone tested you this way?

If you don't trust them then don't tell them anything at all.

Don't tell someone an important secret if you can't trust them...

On the one hand, it does sound childish to do this.

On the other, I might point out to other posters that some people have a really difficult time trusting others...

I wouldn't go about it this though, op. If you feel you need to rest their trustworthiness, just tell them something which is true but not going to hurt you if it gets out.

No need to play games (which, if they find out, I'd going to backfire badly on you)

Ahhh, go on. Tell Mumsnet your bigger secret – we do love a bit of juicy goss. Your secret’s safe with us. Honestly. Promise.

The white lie might not be gossip worthy though, whereas the big secret might be. It’s not a fool proof idea, OP.

You need something that is even more gossipy than the real secret. Which whilst were on that conversation, what is it👀

Colleen, is that you?

Ooh, you're doing a wagatha Christie! (For those who don't remember, Coleen Rooney deleted everyone but one person she was suspicious of from her private insta, made it that they couldn't see they were the only person who could view, put up a fake post and waited to see if it ended up leaked to the papers. Apparently Prince William did a similar at uni when stories were being sold about him, he told a slightly different story to 3/4 friends to see which version ended up being reported in the press.)

Sorry not a help, what's your relationship to the gossip and why are you considering telling someone you can't trust a big secret?

If you don't trust them then don't tell them anything at all.

I agree.

Big secrets and small are different.

If you don't know, don't tell.

If it's something that's problematic if it gets out, keep it to yourself. How old are you?

Colleen is that you?

Again.

Can you swap secrets. That's what I did with my sisters when we were teens/twenties. It got a bit confusing in the end because if one told I'd have to try to remember what the 'swapsies' had been. Came in useful when DSis1 told DM one of my secrets and I didn't bat an eyelid in recounting mine.

Honestly just swap, it's so much fun as long as you can keep track of them. or realise that as soon as a secret is known by more than 2 people it's not a secret any longer. If something is actually important for me to keep secret there would be zero other people who know

You once worked as a pole dancer.

@statutoryliving

You once worked as a pole dancer.

...and was so shit at it to start with you fell off the pole upside-down in front of a rugby team and their coach ended up giving you first aid. (This was the amazing story a now very sensible friend told me a few years ago)

Your cousin went out with Simon Cowell/Jeremy Clarkson/Stacey Dooley.