I’ve been together with a guy for 4 months or so, we know each other well as we were friends before. We both have pretty strong feelings for each other, and he’s very caring towards me.
He’s in the middle of a difficult divorce, though. He’s extremely close to his young child, as a wonderful Dad to him, and is heartbroken not to be with him all the time, especially as his ex uses his son to get at him, which distresses the child (age 6), and keeps saying he wants more time with his Dad than he’s getting — his mum has agreed to his Dad having him 3 nights per week and no more. It’s very acrimonious from his ex — she won’t communicate with him including over their child at all. By the way neither his son nor my children are involved in or know about our time together yet as it’s early days. On Sun we met for a walk somewhere lovely and we sat having tea with a beautiful view. He was very upset that day because of a difficult drop off with his son. Throughout the day he mentioned it. I didn’t mind listening and supporting him. But I’m wondering about being with someone so caught up in this — if he’s ready to be with me. I said the next day, “I had a lovely day with you, yesterday”. He said “It was alright”. He meant he was really stressed because of the drop off of his son.
What had happened was that when he had tried to tell his ex that his son’s friend they’d just been with now had covid, she wouldn’t listen and slammed the door in his face. The son was upset he hadn’t said goodbye to his Dad properly and opened the door and came rushing out to hug his Dad, and his mum called him back. I’m not vilifying the ex, by the way, I do entirely appreciate that she has her own perspective. I’m just wondering about being in a relationship with someone very preoccupied with these difficulties going on. I wonder would it be sensible to take a step back and wait. However I think this situation could go on for years!!