I can't orgasm with a partner

[iwantsummertomorrow]

I have never been able to orgasm due to the actions of a partner during intercourse or foreplay.
It all feels nice, but to climax I need the help of a toy (whether alone or with another person).

I started seeing a new man and he thinks he's a failure I can't orgasm during sex. He said all his past partners orgasmed during sex when he climaxed and he can't understand why I can't.

I asked how he knew they orgasmed, and he said he told them they did, every time.

I thought I wasn't unusual (to not orgasm during sex) but now I'm wondering if I am unfortunate to not be able to. He is determined to make it happen which makes me feel stressed as I don't think I can orgasm from intercourse alone. However he thinks I can't have enjoyed it much if I don't

I'm not THAT unusual am I?

asked how he knew they orgasmed, and he said he told them they did, every time
He told them they orgasmed?? 🤣🤣🤣

I thought all female orgasms were ultimately clitoral stimulation? Either from 'behind' the clitoris in the vagina or from it getting rubbed during piv either by pelvis or finger/toy?

Wow can't believe I just read this.
God forbid his pride getting damaged 🤣
I never finished myself until I became single and used toys. Eventually with a partner after 5 years being together I started finishing with him.
It took a lot of trust and confidence to finally get me to relax enough and enjoy it. I also cannot finish during intercourse unless i have clitoral stimulation .. I've always thought and known that's perfectly normal.
I think you should find yourself a man who puts both your needs and pleasure first instead of just his own! Xx

This has made me laugh so much! So this guy genuinely believes that his ejaculate is somehow a magic trigger switch that activates female orgasm EVERY SINGLE TIME! Brilliant! 😂😂

He sounds crap and inexperienced, with the worst sin being an inability to listen and adapt his technique.
How important is sex to you?
You're not going to get far with this one.

I asked how he knew they orgasmed, and he said he told them they did, every time.

The Fact they told him they’d orgasmed is hilarious! Surely if they’d had an orgasm he would know about it!

I think your partner is in the wrong - without a doubt. But it also might be worth considering that you may have an over dependence on toys. And I’m not talking about PIV being the alternative, but manual stimulation (from both yourself solo and from him). I read a segment recently on this (from a women’s group on sex therapy) and while it didn’t discourage toy use altogether, it really encouraged the importance of ‘getting back to basics’ and getting atuned to what your hands can achieve, in the quest for not having to rely on toys which are often overstimulating and over long term can dampen sensation.

He is wrong. Tell him every man you've been with as loved having a cucumber up his $$$$, so there must be something wrong with him.

Genius!!

He's a fucking idiot OP. Unless you are in your teens, there is no exude to be so badly educated about the female body. Even worse, he's a fucking idiot who is making you feel inferior because of his lack of education.

He said all his past partners orgasmed during sex when he climaxed and he can't understand why I can't

ALL of his past partners eh? Well they do say that ignorance is bliss.

Imagine! They ALL orgamsed via penetration and they ALL orgasmed when he climaxed? Jesus fucking Christ XD 😂

I don't think I can orgasm from intercourse alone

You're in the majority here. Around 60 - 70 % of women can't orgasm via penetration alone.

Just checking on the clitoral side though - a long time ago when you first masturbated, did you start off with your fingers or have you always used vibrators? Some women become desentisied because of vibrator use. Before some readers or sex toy sellers lose their minds over this, I said some - if you don't fit that category then good for you, but it's is something that happens. It may not be anything to do with desensitisation though - could be hormones, a psychological block, medicine use, low mood, vitamin or mineral deficiencies.

Excude?? I meant *'excuse'

@Whateverfuckingnext I know XD. He is so invested in this idea that I'm not sure if he will be open to learning otherwise. To accept anything different, he would have to accept that many, if not most of his past partners faked it with him :/ That's rough for the ego.

@ladyjadie Jesus. That might have been an instant dump from me - the stupidity of that belief alone is breathtaking.

ZOMBIE THREAD
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Hopefully he'll be trying very hard!

I think he needs to go back to school. I think I would be rethinking this partnership! Unless he is determined to try really hard! 🤣

It's not strange not to orgasm everyone is different. However I do orgasm every time . Its not always Been like that. However I do have multiple orgasms now