I need your help please. I think I may have just lost a great guy, and it might be too late. I met this guy online a month and a half ago. We are both in our early 40s, both divorced, both have two kids. His son lives with him. He just finished his divorce, which started a year ago, and is just finishing with property split. We slept together on something like date 7 - so not too early, that was important to me. And he invited me on a romantic trip to Paris for 3 days - where I am now, and he left.
We were talking about this trip for a long time, planning the logistics, he booked a very romantic hotel, we planned where to go together, made a playlist and so on. Before we went on the trip, I told him I had a slight complication - I would have to pick up my son from his father in Germany on the way back. My son was spending Xmas with his dad, but New Years with me, and that was the only way to make it work. So I asked my new guy whether that would be ok with him - he said of course - and then I said that I then needed to introduce my son to him beforehand so that he is not totally surprised when we pick him up together. He said of course, and suggested he comes to my house - where he ended up meeting both my kids, but I introduced him as a friend - and then we went sledging together.
It seemed rushed though and I told him I normally would not have introduced my kids so early on as it's best to get to know each other first, but that was the situation.
Anyway, then when we met in Paris, two days ago, I asked him if he had told anyone he was going here with me. He said he didn't as the whole trip away was a way to see if we work together as a couple. That was upsetting for me to hear, as I did tell my close friends I was going to Paris and that I met a great guy. By this time, we had been dating for a month and a bit. Then in Paris, we actually had an amazing time, laughing, going to a spa, museums, shopping etc. Earlier, he also had invited me to spend New Year's Eve with him, his friends and his brother upon our return. And so today, I asked him about that, who else would be there and just to know what to expect.
He then said he'd introduce me as a friend. I was surprised - and he then asked what I thought about people being friends if a relationship didn't work out. I suddenly sensed something was really off and asked him what he meant - was he talking about us? A serious conversation started - completely out of the blue, we had been laughing and kissing a minute before and spent an amazing half of the day exploring Montmartre. But suddenly, he said that with his divorce just being finalised, with his kids he needs to take care of, and so on he just can't see a relationship. That Paris is nice but we can't just do Paris - we live in Zurich and we both work and have difficult logistical situations. I said that I agreed but that we could try to make it work, without expectations. But he didn't say that he wanted to even try. He asked several times why we were suddenly having this serious conversation and how we got there so early in dating. That made me wonder - yes, it was still early but we had been dating for a month and a half, in contact every single day, and now on a romantic trip where he invited me. I kind of think that it warranted me wondering at least where this was going.
So I don't know if I again did something wrong. I would love to take it slow, without discussing future trips, and just go with the flow. No introductions to kids or even friends for now, just getting to know each other. At the same time, if somehow on this trip he already felt that something was off - I suppose it's not going to work regardless and he's simply not that into me.
What should I do now? Is there any way to still try and remedy this? Should I wait for him to contact me or should I text him and explain that I don't have any expectations, don't want commitment and don't want a relationship right now either - and then with time we just see how it develops? I worry that I may be too late, again.