Does anyone else have a boring partner

[Boredmum2]

Yesterday we got invited round to his cousins house because it was his birthday. He didn’t want to go so we didn’t. On New Year’s Eve it’s his step mums surprise birthday party. Are we going? Nope because he “can’t be bothered” We’re going to be the only ones in the family who aren’t going. He never wants to do anything or go anywhere. It’s so miserable. Yet he’s up for going out and doing things with his friends. Yesterday for example he went to the pub for a few hours with his friends. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve told him I’d like us to do more things together and for us to go out more. It just goes in one ear and out the other😴

Can't you go anyway, OP?

Why can’t you go without him?

If I were you, I'd go anyway! And start arranging more with your friends and get out

@CoverYourselfInChocolateGlory
@TabithaTittlemouse He’d look at me like I’ve got 2 heads if I suggested that

I actually understand him
Doesn't want to see family, presumably doesn't like them?

But does want to see friends.

So separate issue for you and him to do stuff together.

Go to the New Years party without him, why are you letting a man stop you from doing anything. My DH doesn't like long walks so I go for a walk without him.

You don't have to spend the rest of your life with a man who doesn't enjoy spending his free time doing things with you......

[quote Boredmum2]@CoverYourselfInChocolateGlory
@TabithaTittlemouse He’d look at me like I’ve got 2 heads if I suggested that[/quote]
Let him

I do.
He wasn’t boring when we got married but has become increasingly so.
Christmas dinner at his parents house - he barely said a word.
Invited to a friends for drinks last night - conversation all around him and he rarely joined in.
I find it embarrassed but he doesn’t see anything wrong.

[quote Boredmum2]@CoverYourselfInChocolateGlory
@TabithaTittlemouse He’d look at me like I’ve got 2 heads if I suggested that[/quote]
Good! Let him look. Go out and have fun!

Just seen your reply to Tabitha, don't suggest it to him then, just go, on the evening of the party walk out the door telling him when you will be back, he knew he could have gone if he wanted.

If my SIL came to something without my brother, I would be thrilled! Such a great idea. You should do it, OP.

[quote Boredmum2]@CoverYourselfInChocolateGlory
@TabithaTittlemouse He’d look at me like I’ve got 2 heads if I suggested that[/quote]
And why do you care what the boring fuck thinks?
Is he arranging alternative fun at home, or does he expect you to just sit around with him?
If you want to go to your own family's party just go.

I totally get you. And pp commenting just go on your own it gets tiring in the end constantly explaining why your DH isn't there. Plus it'd be nice if they came out once in a while. OP mine doesn't go out at all though. I'm bored too.

He clearly doesn’t enjoy these things. Doesn’t stop you though.

If you want to go to your own family's party just go.

But it's HIS family. I understand why it would be a bit awkward to go to his stepmum's birthday without him, we don't know how long they've been together and how close she is with his family.

OP, I'd make plans with my own friends for NYE and leave him at home.

Two of my friends gave DH’s that won’t do anything. They’ve been together for years but it’s really getting them down now. One won’t do anything because he hates spending money and is generally boring (my friend’s words). The other one is boring and does the odd thing with his friend but hardly anything with his wife.
Both women have grown up DC and seriously considering their options and if they want this situation for the rest of their lives.

You sound like a bit of a martyr op

Go without him. You don't need his permission.

Have a glass of wine for me.

I have to agree, why would him looking at you like you had 2 heads be an issue. Surely you find yourself looking at him like all the time.

If you want to go, go.

The main issue is you 2 not doing anything together. Is there some reason for that?, kids that you can't get a sitter for, never off work together etc.

Don't become a hermit, go out with your own friends or go out with his family if you have lost touch with your own friends, but get out there if you want to.

@flower1677

I totally get you. And pp commenting just go on your own it gets tiring in the end constantly explaining why your DH isn't there. Plus it'd be nice if they came out once in a while. OP mine doesn't go out at all though. I'm bored too.

I got fed up telling people why xh wasn’t attending events so in the end I was honest! He was dull. I left him and got with someone who had more joy and lust for life.

@Doona

If my SIL came to something without my brother, I would be thrilled! Such a great idea. You should do it, OP.

I thought the opposite, it might cause trouble if she goes to his family as the invite is really for him and his wife.

Also confused, has OP had a name change fail?

Seems like it's not just a case of 'he never wants to do anything. or go anywhere' though is it OP? because he goes out with his friends..

I dont mean to be harsh, but from what youre saying, it sounds like he doesn't want to do things with you? Is that more or less correct?

God, reading posts like this makes me soooo happy I'm single. Is this the rest of your life OP? Watching from the sidelines while everyone else enjoys life. You only have one, you know. A life, that is. Away out and enjoy yourself while you're still able.