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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What now?

51 replies

Camelflage · 29/12/2021 01:12

Earlier today my DH (of 20 years) made the most disgusting, misogynistic 'joke' whilst on the phone with (adult) DSS. I won't repeat it but I'm not at all easily offended and it really, really offended me so that tells you how bad the 'joke' actually was. He had no excuse when I told him how it had made me feel, just got all defensive and 'it was only a joke' about it, I've said I don't want to discuss it anymore now I've told him how it made me feel and asked him to just leave me alone, which he has.

But I don't know wtf I'm meant to do now, I feel like he's not who I thought he was if he finds misogyny amusing and I don't know how I'm ever going to be able to look at him the same way again. It seems ridiculous to throw away a long marriage over one joke but it feels like I've had a glimpse of the real him and everything else has been a lie and now I'm living with a stranger who hates women instead of my husband. I just feel utterly disgusted with him and don't know how I'm ever going to get past this.

OP posts:
Camelflage · 29/12/2021 18:05

Exactly crochetmonkey74, the DH I know, the one he presents to me, wouldn't say that. Or so I thought, so now it leaves me wondering what else I thought about him that isn't actually true.

To answer some other posters, it's not an overreaction, it's my reaction. I feel how I feel about it and I can't change that, nor will I be trying to. I haven't asked for anyone's opinion about whether I'm right to feel this way, I don't need my feelings validated, or not. We all have our own boundaries and after 20 years together I would have hoped he knew mine, he certainly knows I don't find crass, derogatory jokes about women funny and that I would not choose to be in a relationship with a man who did. Those who say they would have found this funny, that's fine, you're entitled to your own set of boundaries and feelings, but so am I and the fact that they differ makes it kind of irrelevant what other people find funny.

There has been a conversation anyway, he admits it was 'in bad taste' and has apologised. I don't feel much better tbh, I still just feel disgusted by him.

OP posts:
tarasmalatarocks · 29/12/2021 18:09

I thinkOP that ‘appeal’ and getting the Ick can easily be snuffed out by comments like this— once you are aware of it , you can feel quite differently about someone. I would with a comment like that and think some people have bloody low standards

melissasummerfield · 29/12/2021 18:12

Lol I knew someone was going to say dementia!

Unless there is a massive backstory you are completely over reacting, yes its a revolting joke but to say you thinking of divorcing over it is madness.

ILoveSushi12345 · 29/12/2021 18:14

@2022beesknees

What a revolting thing to say. Could be the start of dementia?
Lol are you for real? 🤣
Christoncrutches · 29/12/2021 19:00

To the posters who can’t believe that women would overlook this kind of comment, I think you need to consider a potential cultural influence - being Scottish, I can imagine various people, both men and women saying this kind of comment in jest. If it was a cheesy food, perhaps the reference would be more penis-y, so I don’t think it’s necessarily a comment that directly relates to someone’s feelings about another gender, more how someone’s humour compass is set. Its possible to find crass humour funny in a certain context AND be socially progressive.

Personally, I’s be more upset that it was directed towards his son as that seems totally inappropriate, but if it was two friends talking, I don’t think that would necessarily be an indication of misogyny.

But you’re right OP, he’s not married to me, your reaction is yours and it’s totally subjective. If he knew that this kind of language is unacceptable to you, he shouldn’t have used it.

I can relate to something happening in a relationship that affects your overall feeling about a partner, and I think in these moments you need to take some time for those thoughts to percolate, and eventually you can see things more holistically and are able to focus on whether their behaviour overall is bad enough to consider a serious reaction. He’s broken your trust and it might take time to build it back up.

SunflowerTed · 29/12/2021 20:12

@Camelflage

Exactly crochetmonkey74, the DH I know, the one he presents to me, wouldn't say that. Or so I thought, so now it leaves me wondering what else I thought about him that isn't actually true.

To answer some other posters, it's not an overreaction, it's my reaction. I feel how I feel about it and I can't change that, nor will I be trying to. I haven't asked for anyone's opinion about whether I'm right to feel this way, I don't need my feelings validated, or not. We all have our own boundaries and after 20 years together I would have hoped he knew mine, he certainly knows I don't find crass, derogatory jokes about women funny and that I would not choose to be in a relationship with a man who did. Those who say they would have found this funny, that's fine, you're entitled to your own set of boundaries and feelings, but so am I and the fact that they differ makes it kind of irrelevant what other people find funny.

There has been a conversation anyway, he admits it was 'in bad taste' and has apologised. I don't feel much better tbh, I still just feel disgusted by him.

Not being horrible but your massive overreaction says more about your character than his. His home should be somewhere where he can have a laugh without being judged and having his character assassinated by the person who loves him most. I think he has some serious thinking to do
Camelflage · 29/12/2021 20:14

That's exactly where I've landed Christoncrutches, other perspectives on the humour/appropriateness have been useful and I've come down off the ceiling a bit now so I'm starting to think a bit more rationally about it all. It's not something which can be instantly fixed, I need to time to figure out how I feel once the dust has settled and in the meantime we have to coexist. We've spoken again and agreed a way forward so I'll just have to see how I feel.

OP posts:
Camelflage · 29/12/2021 20:20

So by your reasoning it would be ok for him to make, for instance, racist or homophobic 'jokes' so long as it's in his own home, even if it offends and upsets the people he lives with SunflowerTed? Some things are just not funny.

OP posts:
SunflowerTed · 29/12/2021 21:21

@Camelflage

So by your reasoning it would be ok for him to make, for instance, racist or homophobic 'jokes' so long as it's in his own home, even if it offends and upsets the people he lives with SunflowerTed? Some things are just not funny.
No I actually meant daft lighthearted humour about body parts
crochetmonkey74 · 29/12/2021 21:23

I totally get it OP.
It's not a case of whether it's funny to others or not. It's a comment out of character of who she thought he was. If I was dating someone and they made this joke I wouldnt date them. I've had similar happen with an ex partner when I found out he and his friends spoke in detail (even with photos) of when they went to the toilet and did a shit. Some people think that's ok, for me, it isnt, and it really put me off him. It didnt split us up but it really did start to change my mind about him. It's the fact that you think you know someone and they do something really gross. The own home thing doesnt work for me, for the same reasons said. It's an offensive thing he said

485bantuknots · 29/12/2021 21:45

I don't even understand the joke lol it's gone right over my head

Camelflage · 30/12/2021 14:11

Still struggling with how utterly turned off him I feel, things are fine on the surface but I'm a bit shocked by how strongly I really don't want him to touch me. Couldn't relax enough to sleep last night until I was as far away from him as I could get in the bed. I know some on here won't get it, that's fine but I'm really not looking for opinions on whether I'm overreacting or not, this is how I feel and I'm looking for support to get through it, that's all. Someone said upthread that the trust would need to be rebuilt and I know that's right and I just need to be patient, it's just horrible trying to coexist while that trust is missing. Unusually for me I really need a hug and it feels like the person I need it from isn't here anymore.

OP posts:
Christoncrutches · 30/12/2021 16:51

@Camelflage

Still struggling with how utterly turned off him I feel, things are fine on the surface but I'm a bit shocked by how strongly I really don't want him to touch me. Couldn't relax enough to sleep last night until I was as far away from him as I could get in the bed. I know some on here won't get it, that's fine but I'm really not looking for opinions on whether I'm overreacting or not, this is how I feel and I'm looking for support to get through it, that's all. Someone said upthread that the trust would need to be rebuilt and I know that's right and I just need to be patient, it's just horrible trying to coexist while that trust is missing. Unusually for me I really need a hug and it feels like the person I need it from isn't here anymore.
Do you think he understands that he's broken your trust and needs to work to rebuild it, OP? Has he properly acknowledged it?
Sleepytimebear · 30/12/2021 17:25

I totally understand what you are saying OP. My ex was an abusive twat but I definitely ignored his attitude to women which came out in "jokes". They weren't jokes, he had no respect for women and therefore no respect for me. He said all the right things when I asked him but as you say the jokes were his mask slipping. I think you've been brilliant calling him out on it. Practical steps forward, if you wanted to make the marriage work maybe some couples counselling?

Camelflage · 31/12/2021 03:00

I think so yes Christoncrutches, he seems genuinely gutted he upset me and is doing his best to show remorse, he's a man of few words but he's said enough. We've talked a bit more about wtf was going on in his head for him to say that and I kind of get where it came from now but we're agreed he crossed a line and it needs to not happen again. I'm not sure what else he can do now other than give me some time and space to trust him again, he can't unsay it unfortunately.

We have tried counselling for other issues Sleepytimebear, largely unsuccessfully as he really struggles to talk in that environment. It did improve our communication away from the actual counselling though and we've got pretty good at working through our problems, no doubt we'll talk more about this. I want to believe this was just spectacularly ill judged rather than a mask slipping but at the very least he knows now that it will be called out. I'm sorry you went through that with your ex, I'm really hoping I'm not dealing with the same underlying attitudes but I guess only time will tell.

OP posts:
2022beesknees · 31/12/2021 07:32

FWIW an early sign of FT dementia is saying inappropriate things, often hyper-sexualised comments.
The sufferer will often not know be aware of their change in behaviour.
Long-term partners of people with this disease will display the same sort of confusion OP is presenting, e.g. wondering if mask is slipping. It is a dreadful disease and the partner will feel like they are living in chaotic reality because most of the time the person is still the old person the knew, then occasionally they will say a remark that seems to have come from another person entirely.
Not saying it is this. Just offering an alternative explanation.

Camelflage · 15/01/2022 11:14

I wasn't sure whether to come back here or start a new thread but I'm still really struggling. It feels ridiculous to say over one stupid 'joke' but I'm actually afraid I've fallen out of love with him, it literally feels like a switch has flicked and now I just feel.....nothing. Things are strained between us, I think he knows things still aren't right but he's got some stuff going on with his family at the moment and was away with work all of last week so I'm not sure he realises quite how bad it is. I don't really know what I want anyone to say, I just feel so alone and terrified this is going to end my marriage. I keep trying to rationalise it, one comment shouldn't wipe out 20 years of love and commitment should it? But I look at him and just feel utterly switched off from him and I'm scared that's not going to change. Is it just time? Do I just need to be more patient and wait for the feelings to come back?

OP posts:
layladomino · 15/01/2022 13:05

I understand Op. The comment itself was disgusting and I too would have wondered who my DH was if he's said it.

But more than that, I understand it's made you question who he is, if he has that stuff in his head, when you thought he was someone else.

You mentioned that there's been some other stuff, and that he struggles to talk, and I wonder if this comment was just the straw that broke the camels back. I think this may be a case for joint counselling. I think you should lay out to your DH with honesty how you are feeling. Don't let him minimise it. He said something disgusting which he knew would offend you, and which was not in keeping with the person you believed him to be. It isn't about the statement itself, but about the fact that you aren't now sure who he is. His reticence to discuss things means this has perhaps done more damage than it needed to do.

By having counselling you can see if you can work back to trusting who he is.

If he really wants the marriage to work, then he will agree to that reasonable request.

Tulipsandviolets · 15/01/2022 22:17

Try to think of all the lovely positive things he's done in your 20 years together, rather than keep thinking of his silly bad taste joke! Most men imo love a vile dirty joke

Damnloginpopup · 16/01/2022 02:09

Made me laugh to be honest. Reminds me of eating parmesan...

Nat94 · 16/01/2022 03:17

In all honesty your husband must be a great person if this is the worst thing you've heard him say in 20 years. I don't even know why this would of offended you to begin with never mind moaning about it two weeks later. Sounds like you're just looking for an excuse to leave him or cause drama over nothing.

EvenMoreFuriousVexation · 16/01/2022 03:41

The joke wouldn't have bothered me.

The sudden lack of "love". Ime that never comes back.

SpidersAreShitheads · 16/01/2022 04:06

OP, you've said a few times that you don't care if people feel that's is an overreaction because it's your reaction. And absolutely, you don't have to justify your feelings.

But I think - in the gentlest possible way - it's worth pointing out that the majority of women think that even if was in bad taste, it's nothing more than an eye roll - given the fact that there have been no other instances of raging misogyny. It's a stereotypical joke - not an especially funny one, but just stupid and crass. It's rather surprising that a fairly mild vulgar joke would provoke such a vehement response.

You are entitled to feel how you feel. So, the reason why I mentioned that the majority response on here was that it's an overreaction is because it feels as if there's something else going on here.

My DP has occasionally made dickhead comments/jokes which he knows I don't find funny. It may irritate the hell out of me at the time but it wouldn't "switch off" my love. If it was constant, repeated and ongoing yes it absolutely would - but you've described a one off, fairly tame comment in quite dramatic and exaggerated terms.

You're clearly very affected by what's happened.

I guess I have two questions/points.

Firstly - is this the final straw that broke the camel's back? Has your relationship been slowly dying without you confronting the fact? Sometimes it's a seemingly small thing which finally spurs action, when really it's about everything that's gone before.

Secondly, I think I read that you're perimenopausal? So am I. And in the last few months I've noticed an annoying and horrible swing in my moods. My anxiety is off the scale for literally no reason whatsoever and I'm definitely noticing a drop in my "nurturing" inclinations. Is it possible that the perimenopause is causing some depression or anxiety? Would it be worth booking a GP appointment for a blood test. Feeling nothing is common with depression, as are episodes of anger.

I'm not saying you didn't have the right to be angry - but your reaction seems quite extreme. I wonder if the perimenopause is in the background and having an impact on how you are feeling in general, and making issues like this seem impossible to deal with or process?

I don't know you so maybe this reaction is your normal? But if it's not, it might be worth considering both of the above to try and find a reason why such a stupid, thoughtless joke which he's apologised for has caused such a violent reaction in you.

I hope you find some answers.

Tulipsandviolets · 16/01/2022 09:12

You maybe over reacting op it's not that bad a thing to say or does it go a lot deeper the problems

Opaljewel · 16/01/2022 11:50

I think it's funny if very crude. Guess I'm going to hell? But I have a weird sense of humour. Personally, I think you are overreacting. But it is your life.

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