I don’t know how attractive I am, how can I know?

[Unsureseatlle]

I’m in my 30s and recently single. I’ve not dated for years and I’m about to start again.

I don’t know how attractive I am. Some people say I am, other times I feel I’m described as lesser than an average woman.

I know looks aren’t everything but I hate not knowing this! When I was younger and going out with groups of friends I feel like I knew where I was in terms of how attractive I was, as there was something to measure it against and the potential for male attention on a daily basis when going out at uni etc.

Despite how this post comes across I’m actually not a vain sort of person and I know that personality is what matters most. I guess with age this has started to bother me from a confidence perspective.

You can tell I think by how many blokes give you the sneaky eye when you're out if you wanted to go along those lines.
But that's bloody grim tbh. Most of them are probably inadequate wanky drooling types anyway.
( shudders)

I've been feeling like op lately. I have a good friend who is so focused on the way her friends look it has destroyed my confidence. I've spent alot of time with her as she's a good friend in all other ways but I can't continue with the friendship. I was just happy with myself before but now have even stopped wanting to eat, get Botox etc. I'd be careful this isn't the other woman causing this. It took me along time to work out it was my friend causing it. Meaning it has deteriorated my mental health quite badly due to it being done ontop of having actual life problems. She doesn't do this with other woman so I'm not sure if she ever actually really liked me. I'm now trying to work on self care and get my mental health better.

@lunarlandscape

If you are within the healthy BMI weight, that's massively in your favour. If you also work out so your body is toned, that makes you extra attractive. If these are both true, just get a good cut and colour of your hair, choose make up that suits your personality and clothes that suit your body shape and colouring. Then you will be more than averagely attractive.

I'm about 6 stone overweight, the wrong side of 50, not a looker by any means, but am beating off unwanted attention with a shitty stick.

Men are weird