I wwnt out with a man who did that (I'm suspecting not even to the extent your h does) and it didn't stop of change during the relationship.... I suspected I would not stop.
Because, ultimately, it's their character. They enjoy it. They feel compelled to do it. They're wired that way. He also dated the almost complete inability tk apologise or take responsibility or take anything back.
I described some of his behaviour on here and a poster said he was developmentally immature, he had developed emotionally, and I thought she had a good point. He was mid 40s and he wasn't going to change I felt. I could see smaller versions of what he did to me in his interactions with others as well.
When we finished, i doubted he'd manage not to throw insults and he did, saying "no wonder you're a spinster at x age" etc. (I was a divorcee btw lol).
A very roundabout way of saying; I dint thi k they change. It'll only be temporary.
When someone is immature, spiteful, nasty, malicious, accusatory, degrading etc in arguments m, it's them. It's one aspect of them. They clearly get something out of it, some gratification that is more important than your feelings or damage to the relationship. And that gratification, alongside the feeling you wont leave because of it ... makes them.repeat it.
With this type indent even think if they believed you'd leave, they'd even be able to stop themselves.
They are abusive (verbally abusive).