I really like him but he’s moving to South Africa 😭

[Kmona1735]

I really like my work colleague, I think we both flirt with each other but please tell me if he’s not as I don’t want to get the wrong idea , some examples would be that he hugs me constantly, if we see each other in the corridor we’ll walk upto each other and touch at least hands or make small talk or just joke around.. he will even calls out for me if he sees me and we’ll walk and talk. He said he would give me piano lessons.. but I want to get his number somehow and I don’t know how.. and now He’s said he’s moving to South Africa Middle of next year and now I just need advice on what to do as I haven’t liked anyone in so long since an extremely bad break up..

What shall I do guys and please don’t be mean

I think you try online dating and find someone else. There's no future with him, unless you want to move to SA also.

Ask him for his number for those piano lessons, maybe it'll lead to a fling but don't get attached or don't do anything.

Tell him you like him and want to get to know him better before he goes - nothing to lose

You had a bad break up so are vulnerable. I don't think it is good advice for you to ''have a fling''. He is going to SA and you might fall in love before then and get your heart broken.
Also, he might be like that with all women - it might be the way he is - I've met many work colleagues like him.

@Pascal80 I said maybe a fling but don't get too attached, some people can deal with it others can't.

Do you know his relationship history? Most male colleagues wouldn't just run up and hug you, touch your hands in the corridor etc. At least if you are not even at the stage where you hang out outside of work and have each others phone numbers. He sounds a little OTT.

@Snoken he said he was in a very long relationship aprox 7/8 years from what I remember and then he just ended it

Tell him.

Kindly, there's no point getting involved.

He's moving far away.
He flirts but hasn't asked you out.

@Kmona1735

OK, it's just when I read it, I pictured quite a flamboyant person, so just thinking if you knew if he has had relationships with women before. The only men who are ever that touchy feely with me, and who aren't my partner, are gay. Especially in a work place.

Step away. He is leaving, this sounds like a heart break waiting to happen.

How old are you and when was the break up?

@Aprilx I find it hard to step away as I’m just drawn to him. I have tried

My gaydar was also going off with this guy.

Honestly I don’t think he’s gay 😭😮‍💨

My friend got into a short relationship with a guy who had just had his Australian visa approved. That was about 15 years ago. They've had three DCs, are married and live in Adelaide. So go for it!

@weebarra oh wow, that amazing

So strange people say to not get involved. You never know what could happen just like a pp said about her friend.

I had a friend that met someone who was visiting her city who lived far away. It didn’t stop them they got married and have been together for 30 yrs

Don't do anything that threatens your job or your professionalism. If you pursue something make it very clear that it has to fit with company policy, be disclosed etc. Worst case scenario is broken heart and looking for a new job.

I will try to ask him for his number even though I’m abit shy

@weebarra

My friend got into a short relationship with a guy who had just had his Australian visa approved. That was about 15 years ago. They've had three DCs, are married and live in Adelaide. So go for it!

I would think very long and hard before deciding to live in South Africa. It's a pretty tough place.

Take up the offer of piano lessons and see how it goes!

Many, many years ago, a guy I really liked at work moved abroad. We had lots of mutual friends (small industry), and at his leaving for he asked me why I wasn’t going with him. Well, because he’d never asked…. I might have give fine either more than a day’s notice.

I've been you and I've been him (with different people obviously). When I was you it worked out. When I was him the person who told me they had feelings did not get the response they wanted.

However, nothing ventured nothing gained!

@MrsTerryPratchett oh, I’m stumped on what to do now

A tough question, OP!

On the one hand, if he was really interested, wouldn't he have made more of a move by now possibly? But then again, perhaps its a bit awkward because you are colleagues.

You could resolve it by being a bit pro-active. E.g. Ask him about his move to South Africe and let him babble on a bit. Then say, lightly, brightly that he can stay in touch with you if he likes, let you know how he's getting on. It signals your interest without starting some kind of mad affair two weeks before he leaves! Then also the ball is in his court.