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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

"But we took you to stately homes"... a thread for adult children of abusive families

1000 replies

Pages · 15/12/2007 10:52

This thread is a follow up to "My mother has cut me out of her life - long sorry" because we reached the end of the thread life.

I originally posted on that thread to say that my mother had blamed me for something that was in fact her fault, called me a liar, got the rest of the family to gang up on me and then blamed me for splitting up the family.

It generated a huge amount of interest from a number of women who, like me, had grown up in an abusive, or "toxic" family environment where we had been the scapegoat or the dustbin for our parents to dump their own unresolved difficulties. My mother, like all our mothers, has refused to apologise for what she has done and many of us have cut ties with our families in order to recover our lost selves and self-esteem.

OP posts:
PurpleOne · 29/12/2007 20:46

What is it with toxic people and photos?

Thanks for sharing that TMSB x x

Danae · 29/12/2007 21:06

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Danae · 29/12/2007 21:09

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smithfield · 29/12/2007 21:14

danae- my god that is absolutely vile! Sorry but that comment would anger me with an adult let alone a child.

smithfield · 29/12/2007 21:15

Just cross post and now lol at fish faced slapper

toomanystuffedbears · 29/12/2007 21:29

Kazz33--{{{hugs}}} and I'm happy for your peace of mind.
For me, it seems like the stars align and all is right when kids can be not bothered with too much interference so they can be kids. All the hovering, micromanaging has its place to nip certain problems in the bud, but I don't think intensive surveillance 24/7 is a good thing-for one thing-it reminds me of Middle Sister [sigh emoticon].

Pages · 29/12/2007 21:34

OMG at the present thing - my mother has diappointed me all my life with completely crap and useless presents and my older brother agreed with me recently that she is a crap present-giver. Always buys some obscure (often expensive, but useless) gift. As a child I remember being disappointed beyond measure every birthday and Xmas, never got what I wanted, always something she thought was great instead.

This Xmas we got presents for the two dc. DS2's were suprisingly normal, but DS1's were so bizarre that I'm not sure even the charity shop will have a use for them...

OP posts:
Danae · 29/12/2007 22:05

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PurpleOne · 29/12/2007 22:10

Jesus Danae, your mother sounds horrendous. That is just plain nasty to say that about your dc.

Pages, no you didn't step out of line saying that. Although maybe you should've dropped the 'w' in witch and replaced it with a 'b' instead lol .
How old is youe DS1 Pages? Am intruigued about the present.

Hope everyone had a good day today. Sending blessings x x

toomanystuffedbears · 29/12/2007 22:15

Danae-
The awful descriptive from your mother is pure mean.

As mentioned earlier by Pages?: The seeing her in 2D, literally, seems to apply regarding desiring photographs yet reluctance for real time interaction.
__
Maybe the 2D photographs can not possibly fight back with the toxic ones. They control the photo that is personal to someone else. Creepy.

But in our experiences: Photos can not speak to tell the real story thus a safe haven for power/control for the toxic ones. 2D -but realistic -representations can not protest defacement, or embarrassment, or misrepresentation.

I think the photos are a cart blanche (sp) power festival for the toxic ones, especially the NPD types who won't stand for anyone else's opinion.

Pages · 29/12/2007 22:21

This reply has been deleted

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Danae · 29/12/2007 22:21

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toomanystuffedbears · 29/12/2007 22:49

Presents too-dear me- we are covering the bases.
I gave Middle Sister a unique and lovely . She didn't use it for a couple of years, then regifted it to Oldest Sister who loved it. MS calls me up and asks where she could find another one because she couldn't remember where she bought it. I said well I found...(catch and correct myself just in time) I mean I think I can find one at _, 'but I don't know for sure'. I could hear the smugness in her voice and so I knew she knew what she was doing. But I didn't challenge her on it, and I also didn't go shopping.

I have decided to not give suggestions anymore when she asks what I want or for the dc, and I'm not going to ask what she wants.

I asked for Agatha Christie DVD(s) and she gave a trial subscription to dvd rent by mail service. She has this and has endorsed it to me several times, but I am just not into renting and have said that isn't for me, several times. (I like to read a book/watch the dvd and rewatch and sometimes just have a familiar story on for background.) But no, she thinks I should have it whether I want it or not [forcing down throat emoticon].

Danae · 29/12/2007 22:54

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toomanystuffedbears · 29/12/2007 22:59

Thanks Danae {{hug}}
thank you, thank you, thank you.

Danae · 29/12/2007 22:59

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Danae · 30/12/2007 00:01

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Pages · 30/12/2007 06:51

Sorry, just had to ask to withdraw that last post saying what the present was - I may be a bit paranoid but just worry about identifying her, precisely because it was so unusual. Suffice to say it was not something meant for a child of 5, let alone one with SN, not something DS would be able to use anyway, or anything anyone else I know would want. I tried to work it and couldn't.

Funny that this has come up... I was actually going to add that about the present thing in a previous post where I said to maisemor that her mother was like mine in ignoring what I had asked for and giving me something else instead.

OP posts:
Pages · 30/12/2007 06:57

Well, it's still there at the moment...

Danae, funny I guess, but weird too. Just so inappropriate. When I saw her in September she also gave DS2 who is 2 and doesn't have SN a plastic toy suitable for a 3 month old.

OP posts:
kaz33 · 30/12/2007 08:43

Pages , DS1 (5) got an electronic weather station (thermometer, barometer etc..). Ah well, they did better this year but then that is because we told them what to buy and bought it on their behalf.

ally90 · 30/12/2007 10:12

Good god...how on earth do I catch up?! so good there are so many of us here now to support each other!

Things that I have thoughts on...

Photos - yep totally relate to embarrassing one's, screaming at my mother to not to take another one, asking her not to, growling at her not to take one, telling her to piss off...no respect for my feelings whatsoever. And she will generally take one out and go 'oh weren't you sweet' in a really patronising way...she does sickly pass me the bucket sweet patronising thing very well. But she's a caring and loving mother and that's what they do, according to her.

Smithfield, just wrote an essay and deleted! Okay...I separated from mother at 8 mths pg. I got cards, things brought by 'accident' by my dad from her, then they turned up on doorstep when we had just come back from hospital with our dd. Obviously my dad and mother did not care that, as I had told my dad on phone, I had had epidural, pethidine, hours of labour, no sleep for 2 nights, high blood pressure still (had pre-eclampsia) and was trying to cope with a new baby. No, no, no...what mattered was, mum. She bewailed it all on the doorstep, to my dh luckily. I was in a very bleak place at the time and was for sometime after. However I think having this thread and all you lovely ladies would have made all the difference. I was only in phone contact with my therapist and had got quite 'unconnected' with him so I did feel totally alone with it all. My dh was great, but he was so honest about my parents I felt he was being unfair to them and they 'weren't that bad'. I really really really wish I had had this thread then!

So anyway...that was my experience. As you will know, hormones are a bugger for making things worse than they are so do what you feel you are able to do. I think with my mother I had hobson's choice (oh how I loathe that book from my gcse's...) she wanted to be camped out at mine, saw it as her right as a grandmother and as my mother and to be all lovey dovey to me which quite frankly made me nauseous and furious (not sure that's what she intends by 'mothering' me but there you go). Go with what seems the best decision for you at this time. Hindsight is a wonderful thing, I think I would have tried to get more support in place and still have sent the letter. But if I could have got away with texts and a brief visit and no hassles I would have done. Anyway you know what your mother was like when your first dc was born...let that be part of your decision too.

Whatever you choose, it will be the right decision for you and your dh and dc. Not your mother or sister.

Okay thats all for now...it takes sooo long for me to type all my thoughts out then delete them to rewrite them again....suppose its a legacy of being around someone who opened their mouth...then thought about what they said...or not must get back on later to read all I missed...only scan read...

ally90 · 30/12/2007 10:26

Hi Boho!! You got here!

[modestemotion] title t'was from moi...and Pages and Bearsmom...we've all been taken to stately homes by our mothers/families. It means they are good parents y'know!

It was something I put on one of my first posts on the other thread, (when I had first confronted my parents at 18, or rather yelled it all at them, they looked all sweetly bemused and slightly bewildered and explained they had taken me to stately homes and how all my friends had been jealous etc.) And Pages picked up on as she had been taken to them too...then became a running theme.

Pages · 30/12/2007 11:28

Hi Boho, is that the quote you meant?

BTW Kaz33 congratulations on the feelings of liberation. It's a great feeling isn't it?

Smithfield, the confrontation is inevitably going to have the effect of dropping a bomb on your entire family. I would leave it until you are sure you are ready for that, and brush up on the toxic parent reactions as quoted by Attila. It really helps to be prepared and emotionally fit first.

BTW on the subject of detaching and disentagling, my counsellor likened it to breaking up with a romantic partner in that you need to have a period of no contact after the confrontation before you can be "friends" (ie have the superficial relationship that some children of toxic parents settle for). As with an ex, you will invariably still react in the old pattern unless you put some distance between you. Susan Forward suggests 3 months, but my counsellor said a year is more realistic.

OP posts:
oneplusone · 30/12/2007 11:41

Hi Pages, am sorry to be nosy but was wondering wherabouts (roughly) you are, or more to the point where your counsellor is based as he/she sounds excellent and really clued up. I have been seeing a counsellor who has really helped me but I am wondering if i have reached the limit of his experience in this area and am thinking of trying to find another one. Thanks but no worries if you'd rather not say.

If it helps i can tell you I am in Surrey, so if he/she is miles away i know i won't be able to try and see him/her. Thanks.

Danae · 30/12/2007 12:23

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