Sell me a relationship

[LittleMo234]

So it'll get to evenings / weekends and I'll see my coupley friends doing coupley things and think I want some of that...

Then I dabble in OLD and they'll all be creeps, weirdos or when I think I've found a nice one to chat to, the conversation gets pervy and I block them.

Or I come onto MN and read about all the unhappy relationships people are trying to escape and it puts me right off trying again.

My last 2 relationships were 25 years and 5+ years. The first one ended in divorce as he cheated and the second one ended up being more about friendship than anything else, so my experiences haven't been very inspirational.

So sell me being in a relationship - is it worth the bother? What am I missing out on?

Literally everything @Houseofvelour said 🙌

I say I am a better person with him than without him. That simple really

If you can't be the person you want to be without your partner, you need to have a look at why, and sort it out.

@Comedycook

No one's perfect...it's about choosing someone who's flaws you can live with because the rest of them is so great. I know I'm not a perfect partner...I moan a lot . Dh isn't perfect either but we are fundamentally suited with the same basic values and even when we are driving each other mad, I'd still do anything for him and vice versa.

The flaws I wouldn't up with 10 years ago are now no longer deal beakers.... I also think it heavily depends where you are in life/what else is going on. Are the partner's flaws going to affect anyone else other than you...

Honestly , stay single 🙈 I’m with an amazing guy he does lots for me but I miss my ME time. I work full time and then weekends see him I don’t even see him in the week and yet I get to the weekends and feel guilty sometimes when I ask for a day to myself. I’m an introvert and really need it. Sex is great and we have good sex but I honestly love being alone 🙈

My DH is a really lovely man who helped nurse me when I was seriously ill a few years ago. This has left me with a disability unfortunately. We do still have fun together, he makes me laugh a lot. Just before he went off to work he said one of our little personal in jokes and did a couple of things I would struggle to do. Yesterday I had a very pain free day and started to dance about to a song from my youth, again lots of laughing. We intellectually stimulate each other, we met while working at the same University and are huge nerds, clever to the point people think we are a little odd. We bring out the best in each other, we have been together almost 25 years.

The flaws I wouldn't up with 10 years ago are now no longer deal beakers.... I also think it heavily depends where you are in life/what else is going on. Are the partner's flaws going to affect anyone else other than you...

In my relationship for example, I know my DH is never going to be a lovey dovey type guy...he won't ever shower me with roses and recite poetry! He is however a very practical guy who steps in and sorts out any problems I have, will print out any document I need urgently, mend my hair straighteners when they break, unblock the toilet and make sure my car tyres are correctly inflated before I go on a long journey! To me, this is more important than rose petals and expensive gifts.

The only person who can sell you a relationship is the person offering it to you. When you meet someone and see what they're bringing to the table you will have an idea whether you'd be happier with that than without. Then you'll try it for a bit, and if you are happier with it, congratulations you've just been sold a relationship!

I just love being with my DH who I met on online dating. It's nice to have that special person who is always there for you and will support you no matter what. He makes me laugh, he's nice to look at and we can talk about everything together. Our personalities balance out. And when I'm having a bad day it's good to know that at the end of it, I'm going home to someone I love who also loves me.

@TheFoundations

I say I am a better person with him than without him. That simple really

If you can't be the person you want to be without your partner, you need to have a look at why, and sort it out.

Biologically we are social mammals!

I'd be fine on my own, I was until I met him. He enhances many aspects of my life. He balances me out from time to time as I do him.

For me I love a partner in crime.

I haven't RTFT and you do you. I think single is better than a crap marriage.

However, I spent all day yesterday cooking fancy desserts and posh stuff. Every couple of hours I'd say, "DH can you clean up?" And he does. I get to cook and not clean. And he gets an endless supply of posh nibbles. I love cooking and hate cleaning. He loves eating and not cooking.

Teamwork.