I'm not interested

[Strawberryshortcake28]

I'm not interested in what your saying

This is what my husband has just told me when I tried to speak to him while he was watching the news. Is it me or is this just a sign of total disrespect.

It brought tears to my eyes at how rude he could be to Me while we are currently away on a staycation in a lovely hotel.

I am currently 14 weeks pregnant and he said it's my hormones making me emotional. Things have been rocky for a while he says I run him down all the time and he doesn't find me attractive or want to have sex with me and if I'm being honest I don't want to with him either I think about other men all the time.

This is just one of the many comments he has made another example is 'ill punch you if you ever do that again'. Also ignoring me Infront of my own family and spending the evening talking to them.

I think he'll make a great father but I don't think he enjoys my company anymore he doesn't make me laugh a d I walk on eggshells around him most of the time .

I'm not saying I'm the perfect wife we have been together ten years and I just feel too much has been said and done to amend or come back from . This has been the latest issue of a long list of problems .The issue for me is after these comments he doesn't take ownership or apologize just again highlights I'm running him down.

He has not got a lot of family or friends and tbh I'm recognising why now if he's treats ppl like this. He would have no where to go if I were to ask him to move out

Is this normal any advice ?

Oh and for the record, I (like anyone I would imagine) would ge very very angry, upset, hurt, frustrated and feel the relationship had to end if my partner said any one of those things to me.

You're not hormonal, you're normal. He's gas lighting you.

There isnt one person on this planet who'd hear that feom their partner abd not be upset/angry etc.

Mental.health issues; he certainly has something wrong with him.

He's also a typical public angel, home Devil.type abuser. Very common.
You know, though - you're the best person, the only person placed to know what hes really like. Don't let others tell you how he hs; your the one who knows him best, lives with him, has been in an intimate ltr with him.

Noone really knows someone they're not in very close, day to day, constantonh term contact with.

I've had evil looks from a (gossipy, somewhat effeminate) man I know through a hobby because I ended a relationship shop with an abusive man I also met through that hobby. He obviously told him a very selective account indeed of the breakdown of the relationship; and he believed it
Had I been bothered I could have told him the sorts of things this nice, family man who I'd apparently treated badly said about him behind his back "he's closer gay, he overcompensates trying to flirt and be suggestive with women, he's infertile, he overcome sates being sleazy because he's infertile, he chose a "mannish" woman as his wife, he's barely got a whisker on his face, I always notice that about "gay boys" etc etc. He used to tear him to shreds, like he did everyone. Yet that man thought he was saltbif the earth, genuine, lovely guy; mistreated by a little bitch.
Noone knows anyone unless they've been in a serious relationship.with them.(or are a family member).

Also he couldn't be all that good at maintaining the nice, kind, stable guy act all the time if your family have commented that he has mental health problems.

Incidentally there are plenty of people with anxiety and depression who gave those without being rude, cruel, and disrespectful to their partner's etc. So let's not blame MH; it's his character too.

He wants to try marriage counselling

It's not recommended to have marriage counselling with an abuser, which he is.

He should have counselling on his own though, to figure out why he acts like such a %$@.

Maybe it will help.him treat his child better than his (ex) partner.

All the things you say about his gentlemanly behaviour ... all short, sweet, public etc. Not sustained, constant, private home life.

Your child will be in the latter sphere; and rhetes nothing like a baby/child to test your every reserve of tolerance, kindness, patience abd forbearance. I don't think he'll be much better with them.

He's be much better kep away from them as much as possible, so he affects them as little as possible. Hopefully he'll be a minimal father who focuses on himself and his interests (as he already seems to do) and his hunt for a woman he actually fancies, who.diesbt then become someone he doesn't fancy. Anyway he'd be their problem, not yours abd in time you'd be very flg glad of that.

You have no childcare costs and lots of support, you're in a better position that many many women.

@Strawberryshortcake28

Im in a lucky position I will not have childcare costs so I know I will be OK financially I am the higher earner but not by a lot we don't have a lot of assets just the house which we can agree on.

He wants to try marriage counselling and has admitted he has lost respect for me I'm still set on leaving but I'm. Hoping a counsler will highlight to him that he is being abusive or see that this won't work
He said he wouldnt want to be with me if I wasn't pregnant

He's said he's lost respect for you and wouldn't be with you if you weren't pregnant??? Why the fuck would you want to try to work it our with a man who said this to you and thinks like that about you?

He has threatened to punch you. Pregnancy is a very vulnerable time for women - it's often a time when domestic abuse switched from emotional to physical. You should remove yourself from this situation to protect both you and your child. Can you stay with family?