Ex not interested in baby

[Smallmum55]

So my ex and I broke up a couple of weeks before I found out I was pregnant. He wanted to get back together but as he had been a bit of a creep throughout the relationship I was against that.
He wasn't very involved with the pregnancy but said he wanted to be in the child's life and be a proper dad.
A few weeks before I gave birth he met someone and dissapeared off the face of the earth. I didn't hear from him when baby was born, at Xmas...nothing at all. Due to this, he's not on the birth certificate. He lived just down the road so he had actually walked past me and the baby a few times and just ignored us.
A year has past now and still no contact from him at all.
Despite this I still put up photos of the baby on social media incase he was interested and wanted to look. The other day I noticed that he had blocked me on social media.
Do you think it's time I just accepted he's not interested in the kid and forget he exists?

If hes a creep he'd be best not near your child.

Walked past you and ignored you and his child, I've heard it all now.

Are you getting child maintenance off him?

Yeh leave it, my ex doesn’t see our child at all his choice, I would never chase him

Why would you want him in your and your child's life if he has completely blocked you, taken zero interest in his child and ignored you both in the street?

Yes, time to accept he is never going to be interested. But still make sure you get child maintenance from him!

Yes, he's not interested.
Does he at least pay towards his child?
If not then you should open a case.
I'm betting he's told the new girlfriend the baby isn't his

Yep. Most definitely. It is shocking that a parent could be so disinterested in their own child but too many men do this, sadly.

He's a grade A fucking loser. I suppose it's better he's not the sort who'll waft in and out of her life getting her hopes up. But imagine walking past your own baby in the street and ignoring them.

It's definitely time to give up all hope. Concentrate on being an ace mum to your baby. He is an arsehole and will always be an arsehole.

He’s probably not
Told the new girlfriend anything about the child at all.

Personally if he’s as you describe I’d be glad that he doesn’t want anything to do with the baby. If he did want contact it could cause more issues than it solves. Reading on here, fathers demanding contact in your situation can cause endless problems; do you really want your child spending time with him? You’ve described this man as being ‘a bit of a creep’ so I would be grateful that he clearly doesn’t want anything to do with you or the baby I don’t know how much support you have from your family and I appreciate life must be incredibly difficult for you in so many ways but to me … I think you’re better off on your own.

Sounds like you and your child have had a lucky escape. Someone who can walk past their own baby in the street without so much as a glance is not the type of man I'd want as a father.

I agree you've had a lucky escape. You can't rely on him, so even if you somehow pursuaded him to show an interest, it would most likely to be temporary or intermittent. A child is better off now knowing their father at all than spending their life wondering why he hasn't been in touch / why didn't he turn up when he said he would / why did he forget my birthday.

If he wanted to he could get in touch. He doesn't want to. I assume he is contributing financially to his child's upbringing?

Report him to the cms.

Tbh there is a little bit more than him just being a creep. He often cheated on me during our relationship but there was also some abuse (which is why we broke up just before I found out I was pregnant) for which he was found guilty and is currently doing community service.
I don't get any money from him as if he's not interested I don't want him on the birth certificate. I'm lucky that I have a great support system and I am financially ok enough that i don't need his money. He's never offered me any money or help so I don't want it.
It's insane to me that he can just ignore the fact he has a child, I can't get my head around it...which is why I've kinda left the door open slightly for him to at least show interest in the baby...but I'm thinking for my own sanity that I have to close it and realise that my baby doesn't have a dad really.

FFS why would you even want this shit for brains in your child’s life? He’s not going to bring anything of value to the baby’s life in any way, shape or form.

Forget about him - move on and be happy with your baby.

He sounds worse and worse. Your baby will be so much better off without him in her life. It's a blessing really that he's taking no interest.

Why would you want an abusive criminal in your baby's life?! Be thankful he isn't interested. It's the best possible situation for your baby if he ignores baby until baby is an adult and can take it or leave it!

Your own sanity!!!

What about the safety of your baby? OP I'm really confused by your thinking here.

He doesn’t need to be on the birth certificate to have to pay maintenance. After the abuse, you may feel better being entirely unentangled but it may be a way of building up money in an account for your child-small compensation for a deadbeat, abandoning father but something at least.

Thanks everyone for taking the time to read that and replying.
I know it's absolutely for the best that he's not involved and it just makes it easier that he's not interested anyway but some times I just need reminding of that.

This is like these women who would go on the J Kyle show and want these wasters to " be in their child's life "...just why ??

Well it’s clear to see why he’s staying away if he is currently doing community service for abuse? You do realise if he got involved social services could become involved?! I don’t blame you for not claiming cms I don’t either so I would just leave it, I’m amazed you want him to come back though considering the abuse

Oh no I don't want him back. Not at all. He wanted to get back together when I found out I was pregnant but I'd never go there again. I just find it so strange that a man is so uninterested in his child...to the point he would ignore the child in the street and block my instagram, the only place he can see photos of the child.
I think I just needed reassurance that I was doing the right thing by completely closing the door and basically not even thinking of him as my childs dad anymore. I needed some sense spoken and I definitely got that here.
My ex is a waste of space and is doing us a favour by keeping out of my child's life.

Claim cms. It gives him no rights at all and makes no difference to his status on the birth certificate.
You may not need the money now but you can save it until you do
I would not want this guy in my child’s life. Your DC deserves better. Claim cms but otherwise just move on.

My ex is a waste of space and is doing us a favour by keeping out of my child's life.

^ yes ! Put this on a post it note in your bedside table and look at it if you ever doubt you're doing the right thing!

CMS is not about you.. it's for your Childs needs so claim it asap. 🌸

Claim the CMS, he doesnt have to be involved or on the birth certificate. Even if you don't spend the money, imagine saving it up for your child and present them with a nest egg one day. And one day you may need the money.