Missing my (male) friend

[Chainbreaker]

I have a fair few male friends, I do hobbies with some and generally get on better with men that woman.
I do have female friends who I also see and spend time with so it's not like my only friends are male.

One of my friends has a very jealous partner and has given him the ultimatum that he stops spending time with me or their relationship ends. He had not told her we had been to collect something together and she presumed it was a date. I think he has barely mentioned me before due to her jealousy.
He has obviously chosen to remain in his relationship.
We perhaps saw each other once a week or perhaps twice at the most, mainly with other people.

I don't expect him to put me before her.
I told him he should sort out his relationship and do what he needs to do.

But he's still messaging me most days and today has said he's gutted we can't do something we had planned and he's missing me. I didn't reply. Then he phoned and said similar.
I do miss him and would love for things to return to before but likewise I don't want to cause trouble between him and his partner.

I always thought friendships were a two way thing but not prepared to be his secret friend. But I really miss him and his support.
I've had fall outs / drifted away from people before and it's been just how it is. This feels really tough.
How do I get over it?

Ah , soooo uptight to worry when your DH spends a lot of one on one time with a female friend. Why be so insecure when he has deep conversations with her? Discusses his marriage with her? Isn’t that what friends do? Gives her hugs when she’s upset…who cares? Goes on trips away with her, spends nights with her, shares a bed if it’s cheaper than booking two rooms…it’s all cool. All what friends do! Wives with young children can be so insecure. What’s the worst that could happen?

You're quite right @Coronawireless, all those times she can't be bothered to turn up to meet his friends. It's never because he won't let her, or is gaslighting her, or that someone has to mind the kids. It's because she is jealous and controlling isn't it.

He probably tells his partner/wife that he's off to meet Steve to have a drink and talk about their hobby while he's really with Bex telling her how his wife has let herself go and doesn't understand him and they're just together for the kids but it's Wife who is in the wrong, cos a man and a woman can be just good friends.