He commented about my food

[Zig27]

There is a guy who I was interested in romantically but I wised up to his games of emotional unavailability and control. I am keeping my distance from him but he keeps going to the walking group we are both part of.

On Friday we stopped at a pub during the walk and I bought some crisps as I had not had chance for dinner beforehand. He said I should not be eating crisps and that it’s a waste of calories walking and I should have his apple instead. I was taken aback by this comment. It’s as though he thinks I’m going to put weight on. The funny thing is this guy drinks a bottle of wine a night. Even on this walk he broke the drink drive limit and had 2 pints and drove home.

What should I say in future if he ever comments on my dietary habits again? I’m really getting annoyed now as I have been going for many years to this group and don’t see why I should leave. I am keeping my distance but he always tries to speak to me at the pub as I stay away from him on the walks.

Are you actually planning to see a drink-driver with an alcohol problem again, regardless of his opinion on your crisps? Seriously, OP?

Why are you interested in somebody who is rude enough to comment on what you are eating? He's trying to manoeuvre you and you're not even dating yet.

Cut him off now, short and sharp - and lose your romantic interest in him as quick as you like, he sounds awfully odd.

Op, the only thing in your post that’s worthy of any thought is that he drove home after two pints and you all seemed to have stood by and let him.

Just tell him that it’s none of his fucking business.

I missed the drink-driving point entirely... that's an even better reason - and report him, that should bring your feet back to earth. He's a twat who feels entitled to drive having drunk alcohol.

And get his car reg so you can phone the police next time.

The OP is saying she WAS romantically interested.

@CurryLover55

The OP is saying she WAS romantically interested.

Yes, but her reason for no longer being interested was ‘emotional availability and control’, not ‘he drink-drives and is alcohol-dependent’.

@CurryLover55

The OP is saying she WAS romantically interested.

Thank you for recognising this! I’m no longer interested in him as he is dysfunctional and controlling.

My fave thing to do when people make rude and unwanted comments is to be really over the top thankful at them. Sarcastically.

Bloke makes apple comment

My response would be along the lines of ‘oh my god thank you I didn’t realise that two different foods would have different nutritional benefits. Oh my god, thank you so much. Legit can’t believe I got this old without knowing! With a sweet but sarcastic tone and a ‘dont fuck with me again’ look on my face

And then I’d report the drink driving.

I didn’t know he was buying another drink as there was a second pub at the end of the walk. I thought he had gone home and while I was in the toilet he had ordered at the bar and had already drank half by the time I go to our tables. The others knew this and did not discourage him.

I'd say thanks for your concern but I wasn't asking your advice, if I feel like a packet of crisps I'll treat myself to some.

Perhaps remind him how many calories are in alcohol?

Move seats?

This really should be a non-issue. So a rude person comments that you shouldn't eat crisps. At best it was an ill-thought light conversation starter. At worst his controlling ways are at the fore and he's seeing if he can change your behaviour by making a comment.

So next time, the first thing I would do is order 2 bags of crisps, eat one and say the other is 'for the road'.

But really, just ignore him. Or if you feel you have to interact do the sarcastic response in pp above. I'd certainly feel the need to comment on the drinking. 'Did you know drink driving kills more people than crisps?'

'You do realise that there's more calories in a pint of beer than a packet of crisps? That's your second pint isn't it? Are you getting a taxi home'

Or a simple 'it's none of your fucking business' should do it

I liked Victoria Coren Mitchell's response to the (male) host of HIGNFY (can't remember who it was) who had offered unwanted an comment or advice;
'Thank you - I already have a mother'.

Either
“Fuck off”

or

“Sorry, what did you say?” the trick of making him repeat it should make him realise how crap a thing it was to say and make sure others hear it too.

Thank you for the advice I will be sure to consider it. (Polite but pointed and assertive - you actually don't want to antagonise this guy or look rude to others)

You again?

OP you need to move on, you’re obsessed with this man!

@DiscoLightsOnAFridayNight

You again?

OP you need to move on, you’re obsessed with this man!

Yeah, shes really scraping the barrel now looking for "meaningful" interactions between them....

He. Is. Not. Interested.

Please stop obsessing over men you are not, and never have been involved with!

"fuck off"

Tosser.

@DiscoLightsOnAFridayNight

You again?

OP you need to move on, you’re obsessed with this man!

I don’t want him! I just don’t like this subtle form of control even on an acquaintance level.

@bigbaggyeyes

'You do realise that there's more calories in a pint of beer than a packet of crisps? That's your second pint isn't it? Are you getting a taxi home'

Or a simple 'it's none of your fucking business' should do it

I like this one