What do i do

[Delilah6]

Seeking advice
Am not sure what to do
He is very verbaly abusive and has on few occassions pushed me and twisted mt wrist forcefully. He would rant and rant for hours on end. Doesnt matter what time of the day or night. Without trigger or provocation he would call me names he wpuld say" you whore, dick sucker, go kill yourselve, your not a mother, you dont deserve to be a mother, you slut"

I go to work i leave on time as i have alot to do with regards to work so i try to go in early. As soon as i walk through the door he goes on repeat sayinf the above negative words to me over and over hours on end. Am stuck and am not sure what to do partly due to stigma of dirvorce within my community and family, and i dont want to feel like a failure. But then our D is still a todler. Am petrified of living alone and been single as now he mostly works from home and is able to look after D when D is not at nursery.

When ibretuen from work he accuses me of foinf to mans house, cheating, neglecting D, its becoming exhausting his negative constant verbal abuse.

We would be asleep and he would wake up middle of the night and begin verbally abusing me he would say " you whore you slut hell has a special place for you and he would pace up and down the house verbaly abusing me.

He just said " until you die no one will ever do for you what i did for you dickbhead i married you, gave you your only child dickhead, its because of me you can go to work, i wasnt working from home your ass will have to stay home with your child i dont blame you, your delusional you think another man will teach you how to be a good wife, never no decent man will want you, your an embarrasement my little cousin knows what to do when she becomes a wife, your a whore, standbin the mirror and see how ugly you are, you think penis will come and save you, anyone that is your friend is a maron, your a clown, all those people gasing you up, they should tell you you are an actual clown, you have no blessing your terrible, its you mate your the problem, your so embarassing, imagin this little boy has to grow up and look at you as a role model, sad times, my 18 yr old neice will teach you more, your empty, you can bring 10 penises it wont save your soul, your cra cra"

For

Ladies he just said to me " you behave like a becky who meets a man and leaves her family and goes and shag men, "

what does the above even mean.

" what advise would you give to your daughter if you had one, fo to the highest bidder ".

For the records, i am not cheating on this man all i do is go to work, come home, go to my local shops to buy essential needs.

I've just read the last three posts and it is full of absolute nonsense. You know exactly what to do. It doesn't matter what rubbish and gibberish he is trotting out. You need to get free of him, end of. Get out. Nothing more to say. Sorry.

Op you really think leaving with your ds would be more damaging than bringing him up in this environment?! No wonder he isn't talking being around words like this....

The way he is verbally abusing you in front of your son will damage him. He will grow up thinking that's how he speaks to Mum, and all women. You must leave him and end the abuse for the sake of your son.

This is the worst thing I have read. Please leave for your son OP. Record everything and get loads of evidence.

@Delilah6 I think you would benefit from contacting Refuge:

www.refuge.org.uk/get-help-now/support-for-women/

I don’t know why Women’s Aid advised you to go to Relate; they must have not quite understood the situation.

Try contacting Refuge, and explain what he is saying, and that it is constant, and that it is so bad that your son isn’t talking.

I really think you and your son should just get out now, and go to a refuge for women and children. Once you are there, they can help you sort out all the practical stuff, with a new home etc. Hopefully you could get a council house which is cheaper than privately rented accommodation.

Do you have a health visitor for your son? That would be another person to confide in. You could ask to see her, and show her this thread. She would be able to advise you.

Some of this is unbelievable. If I were a counsellor under these circumstances I would have reported this man. For this reason I do not believe everything said here.
No way would any counsellor tell OP that her children are better off with two parents like these

Record it next time he starts. And go to the police. Get a Domestic Violence Protection Order and get out of there. Staying with him is going to damage your child a whole lot more than divorcing him and getting yourself safe. Shes likely to be proud of you when she grows up rather than Staying and her accepting this is how men treat women and have a lifetime of abusive relationships her self

I don't know why you would stay with him a day longer. He is damaging your child and making your life a living hell. You can work, you are perfectly capable of living without him. Your life would be 1000 times better, as would you child's.

Every day you stay with this man, your child is more likely to copy himas he grows, and to treat women the same way, and therefore never be happy in a relationship. Don't you want your son to grow up to have a happy, healthy, balanced relationship with someone he loves and respects? Then show him that isn't how to treat your wife.

I wouldn't speak to someone I detested as your husband speaks to you. And you are his wife, the person he's meant to love most in the world (along with his DC). He shows you no love. He shows you he hates you.

Why stay a day longer?

Please be careful though op. He has hurt you in the past, he's threatened you that the world would be better without you, and he is clearly unbalanced - all this means that he is likely to become violent once he realises he's losing you.

I would talk to the Police. Tell them all you've said here. Show them the recordings. Tell them you are frightened for yours and your child's safety. And seek their help to get him out of your life for good.