i am seriously considering this. i personally think she has some kind of bi-polar disorde but of course i could never say this to herr. she is super one minute and the next she is almost suicidal. i never know what i am going to get.
she never seems happy with her life, she doesnt seem to like my father (who is very very easy going but a bit stuck in his ways and likes a very rigid routine), she cant make any decisions (currently not being able to find the right curtains for the lounge has sent her into depression) , she spent years looking after her parents then latterly just her mother (note- they didnt need looking after). the weirdest things tip her over the edge into like i said at the moment it is decorating the house. i have offered to take it over but thats no good either apparently even though whatever i do in my own house she says she wishes she'd thought of that.
she doesnt have any friends. and i mean literally none. her mother really was her only friend. and now she only has me. but i find her exhausting and its bringing me down. i love her to bits and we speak on the phone every day and she only lives 3 or 4 miles away. but she is never happy with her 'lot', she will die muttering about how she has had a rubbish life (which imo she hasnt at all). she ruined my wedding plans with her depression caused by not being able to find an outfit (hers! not mine!) and i had her cousin calling me saying how she was really worried about her etc). her and dad are both retired and they have money to do things yet all they ever can think of to do is to go into town to have a coffee. they are wasting their life. she moans about my dad and how he doesnt speak to her and that she is worried he is developing dementia (he talks to me and his gym friends perfectly lucidly). she bears a grudge and remembers every single thing and will bring it back up (lately she has been talking alot about how i really upset her (wtf?) when she and dad came to visit me and dd in hospital( 7 hours after she had been born in middle of night) and i apparently made a comment about how she smelt of cigarette smoke (well she was going to hold my brand new baby what did she expect???)- also this was just after she made a comment to me about how i looked really huge, like i was still pregant. thanks mum. but i dont keep bringing it up fgs.
i dont understand how she gets in such a state about 'nothing', i think she needs to speak to a professional about everything and maybe they can get to the root of it. iam an only child and she is an only child so have noone to 'share' this with. i fear she is going to bring me down with her. i feel i need some space. its suffocating. she suffocates me with her neediness and depression and i seem to be all she's got and i dont know how to deal with it. so i wondered about counselling. but dont know how she would react to it.