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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Love or Money

104 replies

changesoul · 31/07/2021 03:51

If you have to choose between love & money what will you choose & Why? U cannot have both.

OP posts:
Wolframhart · 31/07/2021 19:56

Financial security is too important, so if I could only have one, money.

In reality, I earn my own money and provide my own financial security so this little game is just silly. What you are really asking is, would I give up my everything I have earned and the safety and stability that brings, so I can have a man, even the most wonderful man on the planet? Hell no.

PumpkinKlNG · 31/07/2021 19:57

Money, choosing love got me nowhere 😏

KatharinaRosalie · 31/07/2021 20:03

For girl her carrier is not very important in my culture and I'm ok with that. I don't mind that at all.

You should mind. Then you wouldn't have to choose a husband based on their income.

RosesAndHellebores · 31/07/2021 20:08

Interesting that you say a girl's career is not important op. Everyone I know who has been looking at an arranged marriage for their sons have considered girls.who are doctors, dentists, lawyers, accountants, pharmacists, etc., for their sons who have similar careers.

Tuscancat · 31/07/2021 20:12

In your shoes neither.

Wolframhart · 31/07/2021 20:12

Sorry, there were display glitches and I didn’t see this thread wasn’t theoretical.

Are you located in a country where you lack basic legal rights? Please know there are women in other countries who hope one day you will get to join us in pursuing equality and I apologize that the following does not apply.

I don’t think you should marry anyone you aren’t really comfortable with. Even if your culture has taught you that your career isn’t that important, the reality is that it’s really important for women to have a financial safety net to be able to exit a bad relationship. You deserve to find someone you want to be with as equals in all ways.

GetTaeFuck · 31/07/2021 20:14

Money.

I have zero interest in a relationship.

GetTaeFuck · 31/07/2021 20:14

Oh ffs the site is glitching and it only displayed 1 page of replies.

ineedanewnameplease · 31/07/2021 20:16

Love. No amount of money can buy true love.

youvegottenminuteslynn · 31/07/2021 20:18

OP you're already married but have mentioned before you have feelings for someone else. Are they actually the two parties involved in this hypothetical scenario?

RiverSkater · 31/07/2021 20:25

The love of my children over money,

Money over romantic love as it won't let me down.

Eardrumy · 31/07/2021 20:31

You are a troll isn’t it. You have several threads about your husband and your many different issues.

Angelofchaos · 31/07/2021 20:50

Op you have been married over 10 years.

So how is this you mulling over suitors for an arranged marriage?

changesoul · 01/08/2021 00:07

Guys if I have started thread does not mean all problems are my some I asked due to friends & family who come and ask me and I want to know what normally ppl think ...

Very much happy to know you all remember me and helping me out and looking after me. Smile

OP posts:
Angelofchaos · 01/08/2021 07:13

You said 'I am not married yet'

If you are posting in behalf of someone else, it's pretty poor behaviour to not point that out.

You have posted threads where alot of ten contributors are fairly vulnerable to the issues you are speaking about. But it turns out uou could be speaking about you. Or could be speaking about someone else. People have interacted with you on some fairly serious issues. They deserve to know wether you are speaking from personal experience or speaking as though you are someone else.

If you are posting a hyperthetical based on someone coming and asking you advice, you should say that. So everyone is aware, what your position in the story is.

Eardrumy · 01/08/2021 07:48

OP you are full of shit.

Twoforthree · 01/08/2021 07:50

Money if single or with a decent guy, but money and a sleezeball, no thank you.

Noshowwithoutpunch · 01/08/2021 07:54

I would choose money.

changesoul · 01/08/2021 08:02

@Angelofchaos

You said 'I am not married yet'

If you are posting in behalf of someone else, it's pretty poor behaviour to not point that out.

You have posted threads where alot of ten contributors are fairly vulnerable to the issues you are speaking about. But it turns out uou could be speaking about you. Or could be speaking about someone else. People have interacted with you on some fairly serious issues. They deserve to know wether you are speaking from personal experience or speaking as though you are someone else.

If you are posting a hyperthetical based on someone coming and asking you advice, you should say that. So everyone is aware, what your position in the story is.

Sorry but I don't agree with it. I can ask whatever I want to ask it's my choice if u feel I m not allowed to ask & I should only ask what is related to Me i don't think there is any rules on Mumsnet.

I ask coz some ppl are not confident or even know about Mumsnet, I ask coz friend told me why don't u ask if u r already on it.

It's free country if u feel I have to post weather it's related to me or not if u think it will not make or should not make any difference into ur replies. So I don't understand the point.

Thanks Smile

OP posts:
changesoul · 01/08/2021 08:03

@Eardrumy

OP you are full of shit.
Abuse is not welcome. Thank you very much
OP posts:
Angelofchaos · 01/08/2021 08:31

It's free country if u feel I have to post weather it's related to me or not if u think it will not make or should not make any difference into ur replies. So I don't understand the point.

I think my point was quite clear. But I will be explicit.

You are posted on mn about your mental health, infertility and subjects that are very upsetting to some people.

People have opened up and spoke about their experiences and taken time out to give you sympathy. But it actually, turns out, some (or all) of these situations are you using other people's situations and experiences. Its exploiting peoples own experiences and its manipulating people.

You may know these people whose stories you are using, for attention. However, since you aren't them you don't actually know exact emotions by this being their actual life. The nuances. Everyone processes situations differently.

So if those people posted, small details would change the answers. As the conversation progresses, small details may change people's minds.

Your free country point makes no sense. Mn can be access from most countries.

At no point did I tell you, you must do anything. I told it was poor form. Which, in my opinion, it is.

changesoul · 01/08/2021 10:47

@Angelofchaos

It's free country if u feel I have to post weather it's related to me or not if u think it will not make or should not make any difference into ur replies. So I don't understand the point.

I think my point was quite clear. But I will be explicit.

You are posted on mn about your mental health, infertility and subjects that are very upsetting to some people.

People have opened up and spoke about their experiences and taken time out to give you sympathy. But it actually, turns out, some (or all) of these situations are you using other people's situations and experiences. Its exploiting peoples own experiences and its manipulating people.

You may know these people whose stories you are using, for attention. However, since you aren't them you don't actually know exact emotions by this being their actual life. The nuances. Everyone processes situations differently.

So if those people posted, small details would change the answers. As the conversation progresses, small details may change people's minds.

Your free country point makes no sense. Mn can be access from most countries.

At no point did I tell you, you must do anything. I told it was poor form. Which, in my opinion, it is.

Sorry to say but u don't know anything about me and my life & what I know or go through or not.

I agree on that some situation is not related to me but u don't know how my near and dear one it's related to and how much I feel and get affected. I fully understand the seriousness of the issue & At no means I would manipulate it coz some problems are of my best friends and my immediate family. So before u make any judgment which you have please don't I would say.

In life we don't go through all the situations to understand it but u do hear it & feel the pain and u would like to go extra mile to help them if there is any other prospect out there that's why using this platform.

Anyways by end of the day all I can say is if u don't like what I'm posting then please leave and don't participate.

Hope it helps 🙏🏽

OP posts:
Angelofchaos · 01/08/2021 10:54

No unless you are in someone's head, you don't know every minute thought.

I didn't say you are manipulating your friends and family. You are manipulating posters here. Pretending you are in one situation when you aren't then another. Getting them to open up about their own experiences pretending to be in the same boat as them.

Its poor form.

You are simply using your friends and family for attention here. But not manipulating them.

Hope that helps clarify. Smile

changesoul · 01/08/2021 10:57

@Angelofchaos

No unless you are in someone's head, you don't know every minute thought.

I didn't say you are manipulating your friends and family. You are manipulating posters here. Pretending you are in one situation when you aren't then another. Getting them to open up about their own experiences pretending to be in the same boat as them.

Its poor form.

You are simply using your friends and family for attention here. But not manipulating them.

Hope that helps clarify. Smile

Lol I'm not in someone's head but I am in someone's house and someone's is my best friend who is having this issue and she is with me who is posting me with me ...

As I said you don't know anything all u know is what u feel or see on this post please as I said if u don't like it please leave and don't participate

OP posts:
Angelofchaos · 01/08/2021 11:30

Its a free country WinkGrin