OK … considering a hysterectomy at 42

[Perriwinkles]

Right … so … I’ve been in pain all day with day 2 of my period. All my plans for the day had to be cancelled apart from meeting a friend which I powered through.

I’ve had painful periods since my first period. I remember crying at the kitchen table when I was 12 but was told to just deal with it! I took myself to the GP at age 17 and I went on the pill from age 17 to 33 and that calmed it down. Once I came off the pill, slowly but surely it all came back: the intense period pain in my back, abdomen and thighs, severe bloating (I look 5 months pregnant right now, no exaggeration) and fatigue.

I have had normal smears and an ultrasound that only showed ‘functional cysts’ which I’m told are normal. Sex has always been painful in all but the missionary position and I told the doctor this when getting a smear but she didn’t say much. I never got any pleasure out of PiV sex.

Basically … I’ve had it!

I’m so fed up …

I never got to have children and don’t plan to now & have made my peace with that.

Have any of you done this? I’m not in menopause. I still have regular periods despite some spotting before and after my period.

I’m giving a hysterectomy serious consideration as my quality of life is just gone for half the month. I get PMS for at least a week before the period to the point that I can’t trust my own decisions in that time and had post-menstrual depression as a teenager.

Would a GP entertain this? Do you know anyone who has done this? Any info? Thank you x

@Dee03

That's so touching that your father is going to pay and that you could even share all of that with him. I could never in a million years talk to my Dad about my period pain. Best of luck with it.

@CookPassBabtridge

Thank you and I'm glad the thread is helping others too. I don't think I really realised how bad my suffering was until I wrote it all down in this thread. How different life could have been....

Having said that, the contraceptive pill helped in some way for many years. I don't think it helped the mood fluctuations but it helped the severity of period pain.

[quote Perriwinkles]@rosabug

Thank you. You summed up my life since I was about 15 with this:

what it did clear was my PMT - I couldn't believe I could be the same person and feel the same moods ALL the time. I had been plagued by constant changes in my state of mind for years which I think in retrospect caused all sorts of secondary problems in my life. Then they were gone

It's a good idea to write a letter. I think I will as I have been waiting for an initial appointment with a gynae for over 1.5 years now.[/quote]
I think 1.5 yrs is unacceptable. Trying phoning them first and telling them you want to make a formal complaint and who is the hospital manager. Any money you like they'll give an appointment pronto.

Do your research and be prepared to ask for what you want. Don't be coy about your symptoms and don't be fobbed off.

Indeed - in fact I wish I had seen how bad it was. But I simply thought that was our lot in life. 10 days before my period I would wake up feeling like i was going mad.

I was very fortunate, in my mid mid-30's, to finally have a sympathetic GP who actually listened to me, plus private medical insurance through work. When interventions to shrink the fibroids didn't work, he referred me to the lovely Gynaecologist/surgeon who listened to the long and negative experiences I'd had with periods from childhood, including pain and consistent flooding to then fibroids and flooding and needing to know I was near a toilet when that was happening. I was 35 when I had a hysterectomy, at a date I was able to choose in a local private hospital. Even then the consultant said he wasn't used to being begged for a hysterectomy by someone my age, especially as I hadn't had children but, given the experiences I'd described, the pain I was often in and the effect the effect of the fibroids were having on my life, agreed to proceed.

Within a short few weeks I had the hysterectomy, including removal of a Fallopian tube enclosed by the fibroids but, fortunately, both my ovaries left so I didn't go into early menopause.

I cannot tell you the relief I felt knowing that never again would I be laid low each month. For me it was a very positive experience and I'm still grateful for that. 🌹

@Newestname001

That’s great and I’m delighted to hear your experience was positive especially since, like me, you don’t have children.

[quote Perriwinkles]@Newestname001

That’s great and I’m delighted to hear your experience was positive especially since, like me, you don’t have children.[/quote]
Thank you!

Hi just came across this post whilst looking for information on what to do about my situation.
A recent mri showed Adenomyosis, suffered with extremely heavy and painful periods. Consultant wants to do ablation and mirena together, I'm not happy about it but there's no other choice. They don't bother listening they don't check hormones, thyroid etc they just want to push these treatments on you before bothering to find out what's going on. The only reason I had the mri was because I went private for it as I was sick of every doctor pushing the same treatment without getting to the cause of things.
I hope you get the right treatment

They don't bother listening they don't check hormones, thyroid etc they just want to push these treatments on you before bothering to find out what's going on

I hear you! I can’t believe I’m 42 and thought this pain was somewhat normal … not to mention all the other symptoms.

If you do go for ablation, I hope you get relief from it. I wouldn’t be keen on the coil either to be honest. I’ve too much pain in there to stick something in there semi permanently.

Well doctor's seem to be textbook so if that's how they think then they should know that all the pain and bleeding is not normal. Every single gynae I've seen has said mirena and ablation, not one bothered to check anything else. You really have to be your own advocate and push for yourself to get answers. I have had enough of it. That's my problem with the mirena the thought of something inside like that doesn't sit well with me, as for the ablation the problems it can cause put me off too. Apparently they work well together and the consultant seems quite certain that I won't have anymore bleeding, but what about the other symptoms. I'm so desperate for an end to the misery that has ruled my life.

I had my hysterectomy at 27 due to endometriosis granted I had 2 children. Took them over a year to grant it and countless gynecologist appointments and then 6 month wait for the op itself. I had been back and forth since a teenager with terrible periods, they left my overies so no menopause straight away although have started with the symptoms now at 44. That also gets fobbed off by the dr as not severe enough for treatment yet. Things is women have to go through hey xx

I have seriously considered this. I'm 37. But I can't afford to go private, and though I'm 99.9% sure I'm done having children, there is a tiny, minuscule, part of me that wonders so I'm not tight for it at the min. I take the pill back to back to control periods.

I think thinking about children is natural when you realise that having ablation or hysterectomy is going to take that away.
I really feel for women that want to have children but have been unable to due to all the problems they have.
If only doctor's would listen we know our bodies better than anyone.

To those on here that have had hysterectomies, has there been any long term side effects for you negative and positive?
Thank you

@Vanillaskystar

To those on here that have had hysterectomies, has there been any long term side effects for you negative and positive? Thank you

I breathed a HUGE sigh of relief when I knew that my days of heavy, painful periods, bloated abdomen, sire breasts, flooding, fear of my period staining through my clothes (and therefore dressing in dark colours on those days), staying in whilst menstruating because it made me so ill I'd be taking the strongest painkillers I could take which I could buy over the counter, etc etc).

The day my consultant agreed to do my hysterectomy I half ran the five miles or so home, I was so happy... no regrets! 🌹

Oops not "sire breasts," but SORE breasts... (wouldn't it be lovely to have an Edit button?)🌹

Newestname001
Great to hear that you're doing so well and have no regrets. When you mention hysterectomy to some consultants they try to put you off with possible side affects and scare stories, but when they mention ablation and mirena and the patient asks about side effects and tells them of the scare stories they try to make out they don't happen when we all know they do.
At least with a hysterectomy you're guaranteed to be period free compared to ablation and mirena, even though the consultant is quite positive the bleeding will stop, I'm not so convinced.
The OP mentioned waiting for 1.5 years for a gynae appointment, is there no system that if you don't get an appointment after being on a waiting list for long that the NHS will cover the cost of private care?

@Vanillaskystar I feel like @Newestname001 but with out the five mile run 😂

And the possible complications go both ways. Someone mentioned bladder issues. Well my fibroid ended up being very close and growing towards one of my ureters (I think that’s the word, the tube between kidney and bladder). That wasn’t visible on the ultrasound beforehand. One of my reasons for surgery was because it was pressing on my bladder and that drove me insane but that wasn’t critical. But my surgeon said said afterwards it could’ve kept growing and easily blocked that tube and I may have ended up with emergency surgery due to a kidney problem.

The pros and cons are really dependant on the circumstances that bring a woman to wanting the surgery. Even on this thread the reasons vary a lot. My uterus was huge with fibroids and removing it gave my other organs a chance to fit properly again (they showed me pictures of my surgery). For others they might be removing a healthy normal sized organ so the results might be different.

@Vanillaskystar

Well doctor's seem to be textbook so if that's how they think then they should know that all the pain and bleeding is not normal. Every single gynae I've seen has said mirena and ablation, not one bothered to check anything else. You really have to be your own advocate and push for yourself to get answers. I have had enough of it. That's my problem with the mirena the thought of something inside like that doesn't sit well with me, as for the ablation the problems it can cause put me off too. Apparently they work well together and the consultant seems quite certain that I won't have anymore bleeding, but what about the other symptoms. I'm so desperate for an end to the misery that has ruled my life.

I really sympathise. It’s a bit different in my country, we have a lot more choice with GPs and can request to be referred to specify specialists (consultants) so you can better avoid being fobbed off. And because it’s normal to go private (public hospitals here are excellent for emergencies and critical care but long waiting lists for elective surgery), you kind of have it in mind that you’ll pay to go private (once you earn over a certain threshold there are financial penalties for not having hospital coverage, so it’s just a matter of surgeon and anethetist fees. When you’re used to a totally free at point of delivery service it must seem off putting to pay, but our system is already a mix of free and paid for care so it’s less of an issue. Cheaper than an overseas holiday from here. And it is really nice not having to go through all the hoops first.

I hope you can get a solution soon. I feel like too often it’s ‘cheer up, soon be dead’ kind of mentality. Fob you off until you go through menopause.

@Vanillaskystar

The OP mentioned waiting for 1.5 years for a gynae appointment, is there no system that if you don't get an appointment after being on a waiting list for long that the NHS will cover the cost of private care?

I'm not aware of this option but I'd be surprised if there was such a scheme. Maybe another poster can advise.🌹

Trying to work out why such an interesting thread on hysterectomies is under the Relationships board 😂

Thank you for your sharing your experience.
I understand it will be different for every woman depending on her issues.
It's just so frustrating when you go to a doctor they ask you about your symptoms but out of the list the patient gives all they hear is heavy bleeding and period pain the rest is just shrugged off.

I did it at 45. GP v highly against it. I'm not in the UK these days, but here I was able to get GP to refer to a private gynaecologist.
She also had reservations (more about the oopherectomy) but I was determined.
I had several extremely valid reasons and demonstrated how informed and researched my decision was.
She did it.
Best thing I could have done. I'm so relieved 3 years on.

@MistySkiesAfterRain

Ha ha I know! Maybe I posted here as it’s all about our relationship with our bodies!

@Eekay

Good for you. It’s a pity though that we have to undergo major surgery to get permanent pain relief … but so it is.

@Newestname001

I’ve no idea but I’m still waiting. I don’t think I got across to my GP how bad it can be and I don’t like going to the doctor.