OK … considering a hysterectomy at 42

[Perriwinkles]

Right … so … I’ve been in pain all day with day 2 of my period. All my plans for the day had to be cancelled apart from meeting a friend which I powered through.

I’ve had painful periods since my first period. I remember crying at the kitchen table when I was 12 but was told to just deal with it! I took myself to the GP at age 17 and I went on the pill from age 17 to 33 and that calmed it down. Once I came off the pill, slowly but surely it all came back: the intense period pain in my back, abdomen and thighs, severe bloating (I look 5 months pregnant right now, no exaggeration) and fatigue.

I have had normal smears and an ultrasound that only showed ‘functional cysts’ which I’m told are normal. Sex has always been painful in all but the missionary position and I told the doctor this when getting a smear but she didn’t say much. I never got any pleasure out of PiV sex.

Basically … I’ve had it!

I’m so fed up …

I never got to have children and don’t plan to now & have made my peace with that.

Have any of you done this? I’m not in menopause. I still have regular periods despite some spotting before and after my period.

I’m giving a hysterectomy serious consideration as my quality of life is just gone for half the month. I get PMS for at least a week before the period to the point that I can’t trust my own decisions in that time and had post-menstrual depression as a teenager.

Would a GP entertain this? Do you know anyone who has done this? Any info? Thank you x

I had a hysterectomy at 35 and it was the best decision I ever made. I'd had horrendously heavy periods since Day 1, from recurrent fibroids. The last straw was when I took the DC to a museum, wearing pale coloured trousers ( period wasn't even due). Period suddenly started, and by the time I got to the ladies room my trousers were soaked in blood down to my ankles. Somehow wrapped a cardigan around my hips and tottered to the exit and to the car park with kids crying and asking loudly "What's wrong Mummy ? "

I went private, saw the gyno and basically demanded a hysterectomy through my tears. He was lovely and just said "Next week OK ?"

The op was faultless, done vaginally so I had a quick recovery. Back at work within a month. Kept the ovaries so I didn't have an instant menopause. Life was so good, never having to worry about what date it was, making plans and knowing I could actually rely on them !

Go for it, OP. You'll never regret it.

Deep pain during sex is an indicator of endometriosis likely being present; am sorry to read your GP dismissed it.

I had a full hysterectomy at 45 and never looked back. It was keyhole surgery. I took a while to recover and went straight onto HRT. Never regretted it. And I certainly don’t look prematurely aged or otherwise.

Recovering now.

Luckily private. A friend is waiting locally NHS and has been told 3 years.

Adenomyosis and history of Endo but I did have a mirena which worked relatively well for me for years but as I got perimenopausal, other things were going wrong.

I was having trouble with bladder and bowel due to adeno and endo.

So far so good. Really good.
You most definitely should have HRT afterwards unless there is cancer.

I had a full hysterectomy at age 30, for health reasons. I went private for convenience of dates, and it was the best days work I ever did.

I’d already got 2 kids, wanted no more, so I had no traumas whatsoever, and was so much better physically.

If you can afford to pay for a hysterectomy I would definitely go for it. If not you will have to pester your GP to try and get one.

I had one at 36 because I had a fibroid the size of a football. Obviously because of the size, I had to have an abdominal one. They managed to leave 1 ovary.

I was only in hospital 1 night. Up and about the next morning, showering and walking along the corridoor (slowly).

Best thing I ever did. No problems whatsoever, no pain whatsoever. Didn't need to take even 1 painkiller. Back to work in 5 weeks.

Never had to take HRT and didn't go through menopause until in my late 50's.

As you're already on the gynae waiting list then you're on the first step, that's positive. But as you've found, the waits on the NHS are very long.

If you can afford to go private then do it. If you can't afford surgery, then look at the NHS gynaes at the hospital you've been referred to and see which work privately. Book a consultation (£2/300) and explain your situation. Most will then agree to see you on their NHS list when you reach the top of the waiting list. They're not obliged to, but that's your best method of getting some time with the right person.

@Perriwinkles and she is out horse riding all the time now. She had suffered with periods for a long time. When she told me initially I was a bit surprised by she knew her own mind.

If you go through an automatic menopause immediately after the procedure, are you more supported?

I'm 51 and apart from the really heavy periods I've had no symptoms, I don't think. It's hard to tell what little niggle might be related.

Realistically, given how bad NHS waiting lists are, and the extra hoops you have to jump through, I'd say it's pretty likely you'll be menopausal naturally before you get offered surgery.

How did you find going through menopause at 42? Was it particularly intense because it came on so suddenly? I’ve been having some peri menopausal symptoms for years.

It was very quick - the hot flushes started within a day of the operation and I was getting them several times a day at first. I don't think there was anything different from the usual symptoms of menopause, but obviously I don't know what mine would have been like if it had been natural.

Some things were improved - I used to get a bad migraine about once every three months. Since my operation, I hardly ever get a migraine.

Bear in mind that if you keep your ovaries, you won't go into an immediate menopause (other than your periods stopping) because your ovaries will still be there releasing eggs and hormones. My ovaries were badly damaged by the endometriosis so they had to come out, but many women are able to keep one or both.

Within a day of the operation
Wow.

I get migraines. I guess that's menopause. I hardly ever get a hot flush. Both times, it was a hot summer day.

I had a hysterectomy at 33 having had horrendous periods from the start, with endometriosis and ovarian cysts just to round everything off 😡 I ended up bleeding for 22 days out of 26, feeling like I had a cannonball in the bottom of my pelvis, never wearing light coloured clothes etc.
It was the best thing ever! I had tried various other so-called solutions (D&Cs, medication etc)
I took HRT and everything was fine.

Thank you all so much for the responses. You make me feel less crazy for thinking of this as a very serious option and for that I am so grateful. It sounds like I’ll need to go private…but it may well be money well spent. I’m saving for a divorce and a house deposit so money is tight but I’m only now starting to realise how much this has affected all aspects of my life for so long.

Life was so good, never having to worry about what date it was, making plans and knowing I could actually rely on them
This is just so true. I had so many plans for yesterday and today. So far today I haven’t even managed to eat as my abdomen is so bloated. I’m tired of having no life for half the month. I’m worried about how I’ll be in work tomorrow as I have people relying on me.

A part of me wonders if I’d be better off with a full hysterectomy as I’ve a long history of hormonal related depression and anxiety (quite serious). It might be good to just get it all out and start afresh. At least with HRT, it’s a steady predictable amount of hormone.

@YanTanTethera123

Thank you. I bleed a lot too but not 22 days. I have brown spotting for days before and after my period - a recent development in the last few years. Good for you getting it sorted at 33 and delighted to hear you feel good now.

That’s good to hear @SquirryTheSquirrel I have been getting hot flushes for a few years now so I think I’m in perimenopause but I’ve a feeling this will drag on & on if I stay natural as my periods are still more or less regular and heavy.

I had a hysterectomy, oopherectomy and removal of cervix 32 years ago. (I’m ancient). I went into surgery for removal of ovarian cysts so wasn’t expecting menopause. My lovely surgeon put an oestrogen implant in when sewing me up and comparison between my progress and the other ladies on my ward was chalk and cheese. I felt energised and was helping out everyone else. It took a while to realise that I must have been oestrogen deficient prior to the op. and recovery was easier for me as I wasn’t coping with menopause at the same time. (A couple of us kept in touch)
I have continued taking HRT (you only need oestrogen) and will do so for the rest of my life.

I have missed the talked about symptoms of menopause (hot flushes, night sweats, mood swings) but far more importantly I have avoided the crippling long term effects which you rarely hear about. Listen to the older generation complain of all the results of oestrogen deficiency, osteoporosis and resulting hip fractures, incontinence, loss of libido, vaginal atrophy, sleep deprivation, osteoarthritis, prolapse, heart problems, even Alzheimer’s is linked to lack of oestrogen.
Premature ageing is also likely. Compared to my peers I look way younger. I have been mistaken for the daughter of two of my friends. I have a very different lifestyle too.
My advice then is if you do have a hysterectomy please research HRT beforehand and know what you intend to do. Google NICE guidelines on the menopause for starters.
You can choose between patches - corn plaster size patch you apply to your buttocks twice a week, gel - which you rub onto your thighs once a day and implants - which are inserted under your skin twice a year. I chose the latter because for 363 days a year I don’t have to think about it. There are other methods but these are the main ones. Do not accept pills. The dosage is huge as the active ingredient is removed by your liver.
Best wishes and feel free to PM me if I can be of help.

I had an ablation at 37. It’s about 90% likely to solve the problem .
Worth a go.
A hysterectomy will definitely stop the bleeding but you’re about 20% likely to get some form of prolapse or incontinence.
I paid privately ( I’m on benefits and a disabled student ) but £5.5k and I’m feeling the benefits.I can hold down a job in the future and don’t have to stay in my house for 5 days per month.
I’m no more likely to get droopy or leaky bits than I would have been without an ablation but I don’t bleed now :) I’d try that first .

It does sound like endometriosis worth investigating? I was luckily diagnosed at 19 so have had treatments for the past 20+ years and now have the mirena coil (life changing - not everyone cup of tea but living with heavy bleeding/PMS/being in huge amounts of pain and sometimes only a week break in between bleeds - worth it!)
During my last surgery they said the next step is likely a hysterectomy due to scaring (I’m now 43) I’m not ready for that step yet so glad for now the coil is working for me. I don’t want any more children.
Nearly all the females in my family have had hysterectomy s before they 40 - I lived with my Mum when she had hers. I’ve seen their changes at such a young age. It what made me delay the hysterectomy for myself .

Also the NHS guidelines have changed it may be harder to get a hysterectomy- but please ask to be referred to a gynaecologist.

No for the same reason but I have been advised to have a complete hysterectomy in the next few years. I'm 40 now. My mum had one when she was mid 40's as both her mum and grandmother died of ovarian cancer and given its so hard to detect in the early stages he consultant advised the hysterectomy.

I dream of my periods stopping.Ive wrecked so many clothes, underwear and bedsheets due to my heavy periods it even leaked on my carpet yesterday as I was sitting down. I totally support you op periods are such a curse for women there really should be a way to stop them after you have children or decided you don't want children, after all what other purpose do they serve?
They restrict your life in so many ways.

It is so irritating that the problems that women go through month after month are trivialised and not taken seriously. It can be a blight on your whole life.

I had a hysterectomy at 42. There was only a tiny fibroid but my periods were awful. I flooded for 10 days or more each month and was in dreadful pain.

I always say that the day I had the operation was the best day's sleep I ever had. It transformed my life completely - I was not in pain; I could go out for the day without taking cumbersome supplies; I did not have to cancel arrangements because I was lying in bed in pain; I did not have to get up and change the sheets in the middle of the night when I bled through a large tampon + 2 large pads.........

There is one warning I would give however. Even if you only have your uterus removed and retain your ovaries, it still does cause you to have the effects of menopause, notably the start of osteoporosis. I was not told this and have osteoporosis problems now some years later. So .... please put yourself on calcium tablets as soon as you have had the op.

Good luck.

And Vitamin D

Thank you all SO MUCH for the advice and sharing your stories. I’m sad that I’ve gibe through life since age 12 with the stoicism I was reared with. It also saddens me that I went off sex (due to it being painful) or just did it despite not enjoying it in all my relationships including my marriage and the effect this had on my partners and relationships. Things could have been so different.

@Todaytomorrowyesterday I’m curious to know what you mean by this though, if you don’t mind my asking?:

Nearly all the females in my family have had hysterectomies before they 40 - I lived with my Mum when she had hers. I’ve seen their changes at such a young age. It what made me delay the hysterectomy for myself

The tips de oestrogen, calcium and vitamin D are invaluable. Thank you.

I’ve been on a waiting list to see a gynaecologist for a year and a half now …