Hard to forget friendship with ow

[dausychain47]

Long story hubby took lady for lunch. Pretty sure more to it but let it go as didn't want separation.
Feels like unfinished business that I didn't tell him there were some other occasions that I know he wasn't where he said he was. Don't know what he was doing but couple of other times he was in a different area to where he said. Not seen anything like this since that time I confronted him re his lunch.I know it will blow up if I mention this as he will know I checked him more than he thought. He still has contact with her on professional basis.
At time had lost weight that was ongoing and feeling better about myself.
Hubby was going to leave marriage when questioned about ow but stayed and has half heartedly apologised. Not crawled/grovelled on floor like I would have liked but we are are ok. I spoke to her and she said just friends. She really pisses me off as much as him.
I went on to lose more weight and felt good but in last year have put three stone back on. One of things he said was he wasn't attracted to me when I confronted him about his lunch with lady friend. It's hard to unhear that now and he says nice things all the time but I think back to that time.
I am worried that I have put a lot weight back on and I need to get it off but feeling very down and tearful recently.
I actually had to take time off work as just felt so low today. I pretended to hubby I had stomach problem as didn't want him knowing nothing physically wrong. But I'm feeling very low today.
Any advice/words of wisdom would be good.
Also can anyone recommend a good weight loss club that isn't too expensive.

It’s not your weight that’s the problem here op…. He is lying to you and blowing hot and cold to keep you off balance and uncertain, it’s no wonder you are a bit insecure!

@Pixie1771

I'm.not making you out to be that at all. But there's no proof and you are driving yourself insane. I'm only trying to help, if you can't live like this then you must meave and start a fresh. Good luck whatever you decide.

Thanks for all your advice.

for you OP.

Reliving and replaying it is awful. If you are in the UK can you access a NHS talking therapies service? It’s free and might help having someone to vent to who won’t judge you. It helped me for sure.

Wishing you well.

@PeridotPenelope

for you OP.

Reliving and replaying it is awful. If you are in the UK can you access a NHS talking therapies service? It’s free and might help having someone to vent to who won’t judge you. It helped me for sure.

Wishing you well.

Thankyou

OP, my advice to you would be to get in or start up some kind of fitness groups / social groups for women your age. I can't remember if you work or are retired or something, sorry, but even if it is a couple of times a week it would be good for you to have a distraction and potentially people to talk to in real life, as well as getting more exercise.
For example, I found an ad online looking for women aged over 50 to go running once or twice a week. We just meet up in the park. (Or there's parkrun in the UK, right?) The point is that you have already agreed when you're going to meet so it makes you go out on the day.

Then you could see if there's a "good mood café" or similar in a nearby town. Or meditation classes, singing, art, anything like that. Do all these things as an independent woman, without your husband, and it would take you out of the house, give you some fresh ideas and make you feel less reliant on him.

@ravenmum

OP, my advice to you would be to get in or start up some kind of fitness groups / social groups for women your age. I can't remember if you work or are retired or something, sorry, but even if it is a couple of times a week it would be good for you to have a distraction and potentially people to talk to in real life, as well as getting more exercise. For example, I found an ad online looking for women aged over 50 to go running once or twice a week. We just meet up in the park. (Or there's parkrun in the UK, right?) The point is that you have already agreed when you're going to meet so it makes you go out on the day.

Then you could see if there's a "good mood café" or similar in a nearby town. Or meditation classes, singing, art, anything like that. Do all these things as an independent woman, without your husband, and it would take you out of the house, give you some fresh ideas and make you feel less reliant on him.

Good ideas. Thankyou