Am I oversensitive, or was this a shitty thing to do?

[rainydays2021]

Long-time lurker (sistine chapel, penis beaker, Korean lady). Have nc for this thread.

I just need some outside perspective on something that happened on Friday to know whether I'm being a drama llama, or if my DH's actions were insensitive at best.

On Friday, the weather was awful here, lots of heavy rain on and off throughout the day. We don't have a car, so I walk the DC to school (DH has done pick up twice since September). The only umbrella we have is a huge golf one that takes up the whole pavement, so before heading out I checked with Alexa if it was going to rain. Response was that it would be cloudy until 7pm, so I thought I'd chance it.

As I'm leaving, DH says "Take the umbrella" but I tell him it should be okay.

Well, the heavens opened as I was waiting for DC in the playground. They had their umbrellas and wellies, so we started the walk back home. To say I got drenched is an understatement - my waterproof jacket got soaked to the inside!

Arrived back home, standing in the kitchen taking off DC's things, literally dripping wet. DH comes in and instructs DS (17) to "Quick get a towel for the floor". The fucking floor. Like, seriously, not me. The floor.

He made a huge fuss of the floor, making sure it was dry, ignoring me.

Afterwards, I explained his reaction had hurt me. That I didn't need him to feel sorry for me, but to prioritise the floor being dry was incomprehensible to me.

His response was that he'd advised me to take an umbrella and I'd ignored his advice, that I am an adult and therefore should bear the consequences...

So, do I need to give my head a wobble and move on, or was this a really shitty response from DH???

I’ve got real wood floors, I’d have banned you from entering wet (the panic of making sure water doesn’t turn the wood black).
.. I would then offer you a towel.

I think we need to know what the floor is made of. Tiled = YANBU, laminate = YABU

Our laminate bubbles up at the joins when it gets drenched so DH would definitely have panicked about the floor. If i ever get soaked in the rain I tend to take the wettest stuff off while on the inner door mat and then run upstairs.

Long-time lurker (sistine chapel, penis beaker, Korean lady). Have nc for this thread.

Could anyone summarize or better still give me a link to the Sistine chapel? I know the other two but this is one I haven't heard of ....

In the absence of OP telling us what floor she has..

Yep you are being over sensitive. I can't see why you don't get a umbrella or use a large one. If my partner ignored my advice (cos they didn't want to carry an umbrella) and then expected special treatment because they were wet I wouldn't be best pleased.

Did you really want him to do the school run? Is that what you were hoping from the situation?

Another man who thinks he's the big boss and likes to make a point, act like a dick, when the little woman didn't do as she was told.

@SunshineCake

Another man who thinks he's the big boss and likes to make a point, act like a dick, when the little woman didn't do as she was told.

Tbh, I'd have responded in the same way he did. As would many of the women who've replied so... 🤷🏻‍♀️

I'm not sure suggesting someone takes an umbrella out when it looks like rain is particularly dickish behaviour, if I'm honest.

@YarnOver

You’re welcome:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3178898-DH-embarrassed-by-my-sensitivity

I would do the same of dp came in and soaked floors to be honest.

I think you are being over sensitive.

I'd be so happy if my DP started to clean/mop up the floor 😂

It's one of those situations that could be completely nothing - he was a bit irritable/exasperated/pompous about being proven right.

But I can also imagine the same actions and words being very cold and punishing too.

I just watched a bit of "sleeping with the enemy" though so my feelings are probably hung over from that.

I think you were there and your feelings were your feelings and I'm not going to dismiss them by saying you were too sensitive. I think it's a good sign that you had the confidence to explain to him how it came across. It's hard to know from just reading it how he intended it.

Yeah you were oversensitive

@SunshineCake

Another man who thinks he's the big boss and likes to make a point, act like a dick, when the little woman didn't do as she was told.

Yeah not sure cleaning thr wet floor or suggesting a brolly is being a dick. If so, call me one, I’d likely do the same.

@Guavaf1sh

Yeah you were oversensitive

I personally think he was. He made a point of “punishing” you because you didn’t take his advice. That’s pretty over sensitive.

I’m kinda in the “depends on the floor “ camp, it’s carpet/ laminate/ engineered wood then probably yeah bit over-sensitive, after all most people get showed everyday and don’t take any harm…
But who knows

I never said he was a sick for suggesting she use an umbrella. But he is from the way he acted.

Sounds like he was trying to make a point about how you should have taken his advice, that would annoy me too.

[quote BobLemon]@YarnOver

You’re welcome:
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3178898-DH-embarrassed-by-my-sensitivity[/quote]
I'm going to read this later. It looks like a good'un thank you!!!