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Original poster

Flaked on again. Should I send a snippy message?

39 replies

Heidi3333 · 17/06/2021 17:58

Hi ladies.
Not sure what to do.
I've been in touch with a guy from a dating site for about 2 months. There's been lots of chatting on line and 2 dates. We were scheduled to have our third date tonight but he went cold on me at the beginning of the week and when I messaged him yesterday he said he had food poisoning and then didn't reply to a further message I sent him. I haven't heard from him since.

Early on - before we went in our first date - we had organised a video chat but he never answered when I called him twice!

I thought we had a good thing going and he seemed smitten with me at times. He was the one asking for the dates! I never asked him once but did show my interest in other ways.

I was upset when I realised I'd been 'dumped'. I'm not so bothered now and sort of me just wants to leave it, the other part wants to call him out over his behaviour 😡.

I no longer want to see him as he's far to flakey for me and doesn't seem to know what he wants but I don't think guys should be let off for treating women like this. I'm tempted to send him a message tomorrow along the lines of 'thanks for flaming on me again. What a charming guy you turned out to be'.

Or would that show that I care too much?

Thanks for any advice!

OP posts:
VettiyaIruken · 17/06/2021 17:59

I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of thinking I gave a shit tbh.
Better to just block him and move on.

Umberellatheweatha · 17/06/2021 18:01

I think just blocking him sends the message that he cant just string you along. Without making you the bad guy.

2 dates in 2 months. He is taking the piss. Just sack him off.

Welshgal85 · 17/06/2021 18:03

I wouldn’t bother to be honest, just leave it he isn’t worth the energy and your better off out of any drama!

Aquamarine1029 · 17/06/2021 18:05

Block and delete. That's all you should do. Why give him a second of your time? He won't give a shit, I assure you.

Prisonbreak · 17/06/2021 18:15

Honestly, you sending that will be something him and his mates laugh about

Original poster
Heidi3333 · 17/06/2021 18:17

Prison break- sadly I think you may be right 🙁

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 17/06/2021 18:17

Honestly what do you think he’s going to do when he gets that message? Find he suddenly gives a fuck? Or think he dodged a bullet.

Block and delete, you’ve met the guy twice, he was hardly smitten.

CMSdividend · 17/06/2021 18:18

Attached and he thinks his OH has got wind of it?

gamerchick · 17/06/2021 18:20

He's either in a relationship or he's been dating around and you're not it. Just block him and move on. It's not worth it.

SuperMonkeys · 17/06/2021 18:20

You've met him twice in 2 months. Neither of you owe the other anything.

lemorella · 17/06/2021 18:23

Don't block him but don't also don't text him again.

Wait to see if he messages again in the future and simply reply 'sorry who is this?' Then never text him again.

Next time pick up on the red flags much earlier - if he isn't asking you on a date every week 'he's just not that into you'

Bluntness100 · 17/06/2021 18:24

Your language shows you became over invested too quickly op.

“A good thing going” “smitten”

This is a man you met twice, he’s a stranger, he decided not to pursue it further, yes it would have been better if he told you and didn’t just dump and ghost, but after two dates it shouldn’t matter so much.💐

Bluntness100 · 17/06/2021 18:24

@lemorella

Don't block him but don't also don't text him again.

Wait to see if he messages again in the future and simply reply 'sorry who is this?' Then never text him again.

Next time pick up on the red flags much earlier - if he isn't asking you on a date every week 'he's just not that into you'

Really? She’s not 12.
OrchestraOfWankery · 17/06/2021 18:25

Yeah he's not single. Block and delete.

shakeitoffshakeacocktail · 17/06/2021 18:26

In a round about way it's good that this happened now. Guys on dating sites are hard to gauge. Generally if they want a date and YOU are delaying/ getting to know them and they respect you (don't try to rush you to date 3 or whatever) and are still interested. You've got a better chance of finding a good one 🤞

I've dated guys who I know are 'daters'
I've dated guys I'm 90% sure are invested in seeing where it goes without other 'distractions'

Move on and keep going OP, have standards and respect them and you will weed out the guys who are not worth it

Beannag · 17/06/2021 18:26

I'd also not reply, he will come crawling back and then you can ignore and block.

osbertthesyrianhamster · 17/06/2021 18:29

I'd just block and delete, no message. Fuck him.

Monsteraobliqua · 17/06/2021 18:37

Nah. Just block him. That's the only message he needs to receive. Hopefully he'll continue having the shits for some time yet.

Bagamoyo1 · 17/06/2021 18:43

I like to have the last word so I’d probably send “how’s the food poisoning 😂”
Then he knows you haven’t fallen for his bullshit but will think you find it all amusing. Being caught out lying always makes people feel a bit stupid.

lemorella · 17/06/2021 18:45

@Bluntness100

She can read all the replies and pick the one she likes.

Bagamoyo1 · 17/06/2021 18:45

I don’t like blocking. Apart from anything else, we all know it’s what people do when someone has got under their skin. And anyway, he wouldn’t even know you’d blocked him unless he tried to message you, which he probably won’t.

ThatOtherPoster · 17/06/2021 18:51

I never asked him once but did show my interest in other ways.

I don’t know why but this sentence makes me think you sent him saucy selfies, or sexted him. I hope I’m wrong.

Anyway, just ignore him from now on. It’s not your job to police how crap men date. It’s your job to keep looking till your find a decent one.

LizzieMacQueen · 17/06/2021 18:51

Did you already sleep with him OP @Heidi3333 ?

Original poster
Heidi3333 · 17/06/2021 19:02

No I didn't sleep with him! And I'm glad I didn't. We had a date a week ago and the week before that. We had a kiss last week for the first time. I never sent any saucy pics at all. What I liked about him actually was that he wasn't sleazy in the slightest like the majority of men on dating sites. He was actually quite shy.

I'm v fussy so it rate for me to meet someone I both fancied (he was beautiful) AND liked. I'm a bit gutted tbh 😭

OP posts:
GentlemanJay · 17/06/2021 19:02

@lemorella

Don't block him but don't also don't text him again.

Wait to see if he messages again in the future and simply reply 'sorry who is this?' Then never text him again.

Next time pick up on the red flags much earlier - if he isn't asking you on a date every week 'he's just not that into you'

My mum drilled something into me that has stood me in good stead. The moment someone starts to mess you about, get rid.

I've done a lot of dating. The thing that pisses people off the most is, when you you answer with "who is this".

So don't block. Just delete his details. I guarantee if you get chance to do this, it will give you great pleasure.