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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

He says he regrets everything, what do I do

57 replies

Hasiva · 15/06/2021 22:46

I’ve been dating a guy for a month now and from the second date he was telling me he loved me which yes I know was too soon, I told him that it wasn’t love and he told me not to dictate his feelings which I never argued with..

Right from the get go he was very intense and passionate about me, crying when he thought I blocked him, I told him a couple weeks in I didn’t want to be with him as I just felt smothered he also cried at that too and I felt bad so I just stayed.. we both booked off a week just to get away for a few days aswell, he spoke about the idea of moving out together after New Years next year.. to which I told him he was rushing and moving way too fast

The last time I seen him I felt I connected with him as he had calmed down and we spoke about everything, all our feelings etc..

We see each other one night and day a week and today he told me one of his days off got moved to a different day which means I can’t see him every week, it’s more like every other week or once a month depending on my shifts..

He’s told me now that he regrets forcing me to love him that he shouldn’t have said he loved me too soon, he regrets talking about moving in together and that he doesn’t really see this working out as we can’t see each other much.. he said we could still be friends in which I said I don’t want to just be friends..

He basically regrets moving too quickly, the holiday is cancelled but I didn’t think that was going ahead anyways as I kept asking him if he booked the hotel and he was always like he’ll do it later or closer to the date..

In all honesty I’m just thinking about calling it quits, I just want to know everyone’s perspective on this and what you think I should do.. Please don’t be mean as it’s not necessary.

OP posts:
PurpleyBlue · 15/06/2021 23:04

Even if it's not intentional, do you really want to be with someone who is like this after 1 month?

NinaMimi · 15/06/2021 23:11

I agree with others. It shouldn’t be this much work early on. He sounds unstable. You can do better. Just move on.

Ninkanink · 15/06/2021 23:12

Is shouldn’t be this much work ever.

FuckUcuntychops · 15/06/2021 23:14

Run like the fucking wind and don’t look back he’s a fucking nobhead.

Poppop4 · 15/06/2021 23:20

I dated someone like this when I was 18. Our first date was 2 days before Valentine’s Day, we worked together in a big department store. On Valentine’s day I come to my desk at work and he’s covered it in red roses, chocolates me to you teddys holding I love you pillows it was freaky freaky shit! My boss came in to find me just staring at it and she found it hilarious. He then came over the tannoy to tell the whole store that he’d found the love of his life it was mortifying!
I promptly ended things with him and he went to my mums house crying on the doorstep. Honestly I couldn’t run away quick enough!
He then told everyone at work that I’d given him a blow job and I was that unsexy that he couldn’t even get hard so I sucked it soft for a while then licked his bumhole 🤮 (I absolutely did neither) so what for loving me ay?
Run the fuck away while you can!
He sounds like an absolute loon and is definitely love bombing you.

Nitpickpicnic · 15/06/2021 23:48

My 10yo DD has a ‘boyfriend’ who exhibits far more maturity and common sense than this guy. He’s more fun, too.

OP, he has already called it quits. Nothing remains but to wish him well and delete his details.

partyatthepalace · 16/06/2021 00:22

He’s unhinged.

Get rid. Now.

EloquentlyBrash · 16/06/2021 00:35

He’s trying to force you to move in with him.

Absolutely get rid, sounds like a nutter and an emotionally abusive shit.

Anordinarymum · 16/06/2021 00:51

He's not a keeper is he ?

katy1213 · 16/06/2021 01:05

The first sign of blubbing, I'd have shoved him a Kleenex and sent him packing.
Deeply unattractive, manipulative and not worth the drama.

ElizabethTudor · 16/06/2021 01:10

Anyone who cries over being blocked would immediately be showed the door. Let alone the rest of the madness he’s displayed.
Get out now. In fact, block him again. And let him weep.

Onthedunes · 16/06/2021 01:11

@Poppop4

He sounded lovely.

Amazing how spiteful some boys can be.

Mintjulia · 16/06/2021 01:22

Run for the hills. He's piling on the pressure then backing off, trying to manipulate you. Just get rid of him.

Summerfun54321 · 16/06/2021 01:50

What an mess. Block and move on now.

GertietheGherkin · 16/06/2021 01:57

@Poppop4

I dated someone like this when I was 18. Our first date was 2 days before Valentine’s Day, we worked together in a big department store. On Valentine’s day I come to my desk at work and he’s covered it in red roses, chocolates me to you teddys holding I love you pillows it was freaky freaky shit! My boss came in to find me just staring at it and she found it hilarious. He then came over the tannoy to tell the whole store that he’d found the love of his life it was mortifying! I promptly ended things with him and he went to my mums house crying on the doorstep. Honestly I couldn’t run away quick enough! He then told everyone at work that I’d given him a blow job and I was that unsexy that he couldn’t even get hard so I sucked it soft for a while then licked his bumhole 🤮 (I absolutely did neither) so what for loving me ay? Run the fuck away while you can! He sounds like an absolute loon and is definitely love bombing you.
Dear God 😮 I know it's not nice to laugh, but I have to admit this made me howl 😂😂
LopsidedWombat · 16/06/2021 02:01

I'd say it's good that you're seeing this behaviour after just a month, nice and early so you can swiftly move on before you've wasted much time on what sounds like a very unstable and/or emotionally immature person.

Providora · 16/06/2021 02:04

Call it quits? But he already broke up with you didn't he?

Sounds like he's done you a favour. In future, please don't stay with people just because you they make you feel guilty. That's actually a really good reason not to stay.

MobyDicksTinyCanoe · 16/06/2021 02:15

God I couldnt be arsed with that drama...... Chuckit in the fuckit bucket and move on.

1forAll74 · 16/06/2021 02:19

He's an odd bloke,if he keeps crying about things, how old is he ? He lives in his own little sad world, so don't go there.

Tossblanket · 16/06/2021 03:13

Yep, sounds mental.

Backtoblack1 · 16/06/2021 03:21

Take the hit and end it x

BlueDaises · 16/06/2021 03:29

Oooft he's doing you a favour... BLOCK ☺️

AgentJohnson · 16/06/2021 07:43

Block and move on. He love bombed you and now circumstances have changed the relationship is no longer convenient for him, your feelings were never important. His type of love is selfish because it’s all about him.

VettiyaIruken · 16/06/2021 07:54

Far too much drama. Walk away.

ChangePart1 · 16/06/2021 08:48

Well, he’s ended it, so you do nothing. You block him and move on. It’s been a few dates, don’t give it more thought.

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