Apologies in advance, I imagine this will be a long one.
On Saturday I had planned to grab some milk, go to a music shop to get guitar strings and then drop something off round a friends. I didn't expect to be gone for too long, but didn't say to partner (been together 3 and a half years) when I would be back or how long I thought I would be. I left him and dd (9) at home. I knew he wanted to get on with doing stuff in the garden but he could easily leave dd upstairs (we live in flats) to do this, she's perfectly fine. So didn't think that there was any limit on my time, neither of us had anything else planned for the day.
I ended up taking a while longer than I expected - the music shop wasn't open at the time it said on the website so I had to hang around for about 40 minutes. Then went to friends and had a coffee and chat. All in all I was gone just under 3 hours. After about an hour and 40mins, partner texts asking where I am. I rang him to let him know and he was clearly pissed off said 'I've got things to do' and hung up on me. I finished my coffee and headed home, I was bracing myself for a fight (because I know him) so when I got back I did say 'what the hell are you mad about', which I appreciate was not the best way to start a conversation. I explained about the shop not being open, that I had done exactly what I said I was doing and that it didn't stop him getting stuff done in the garden. I rarely leave him caring for dd alone so it's not like this is a regular occurrence. He got really angry, seemingly more because 'when he takes longer that expected I get annoyed with him'. I feel that this is unfair and mostly untrue. I have in the past asked him to let me know if he's going to be late because I do get a bit panicky worrying that something has happened to him if he's not back at the time he's supposed to be. But I don't get mad at him, I just feel anxious until he's back and have previously asked him to let me know if he's going to be late. The only times I've ever been annoyed is if I need him home for some reason (like if I need to go to an appointment or something like that). I feel this situation is different as I hadn't given a time and he wasn't waiting on me so he could do something. Yes I could have called to let him know about the shop and that I was going to be a bit longer than I thought, but I really don't think the situation deserves him being so angry. And he's now treating me as if I'm the one who's done something wrong, whereas I think I did nothing wrong and his anger and unpleasantness are what is really bad. Do other people think that he's right? I really do try to reflect and consider the ways in which I may be at fault but I really don't feel like I am, and he's so certain that I am 🤷♀️