Why would he have a lighter?

[YetAnotherHastyNameChange]

I’ve been seeing a really lovely guy for nearly a year now. No red flags at all, we have a great time together and I’m completely falling in love with him.

This morning while at mine I noticed a lighter had fallen out of his pocket. He noticed it a few minutes later, assumed I hadn’t seen it and put it back in his pocket. I’m a non- smoker, I’ve never smoked (apart from very occasionally smoking cannabis. He told me he’s a non-smoker who has also never had a smoking habit and has very occasionally smoked cannabis too but hasn’t done for years. In all the time I’ve known him he’s never smelt of smoke, we’ve spent a good 5-6 days together and he’s never sneaked off anywhere that could be used as a cover for having a fag. I’ve got a pretty sensitive sense of smell and I’ve never smelt cigarettes on him either.

So why would he have a lighter? I will ask him, obviously, I’m just trying to think of there’s another reason for carrying a lighter around in your pocket that I’ve completely missed. I don’t have a problem if he is smoking, I’ve never suggested that I’d have a problem with him smoking so I just don’t understand why he’s try and hide something like that from me. It just seems really odd.

sillawithins this isn’t the only thing I have to worry in my life at all. Is it the only thing you have to comment on? Is there nothing more interesting in your life right now for you to comment on? I wish I had such a simple life where the only thing I had to do in a day was to comment on a MN thread that I had no interest in.

Not a posh one or a souvenir one. Just a bog standard plastic jobb or.

I know lots of people who smoke cigarettes occasionally who wouldn't want to admit to being smokers (myself included), I've been caught out with a lighter more than once!

@Scarby9 how often do you get splinters?! That's possibly the most elaborate set of preparations for a splintering event I have heard of.

DH has one, he uses it for various things, he doesn't smoke.

I have a fire and regularly leave matches / lighter in the wrong place, pick them up to move them and put them in pockets only to find again days later!

@Monkeytapper

Crack pipe or tea light

Go hard or go home.

@Whitegrapewine
Practically never!!
I think I just collected a free matchbook in some restaurant years ago and slipped it in the zipped pocket in my bag where the sewing kit already was. Then some kid got a splinter and I was able to combine the two - I have used it quite a few times since, and also lit the odd birthday candle over the years too.
I didn't set out to carry a de-splintering kit at all times!

My DP has a lighter and he doesn't smoke. He uses it for all sorts of other stuff, he also has one of those zippo hand warmer things that you have to light. He also carries a multi tool sometimes. I'd not find it odd if it was in his pocket, he either used it for something or more often saw it laying around somewhere and put it in his pocket thinking he'd put it on his dresser where he normally keeps it but hadn't got around to it yet / forgot.

If it's not a big deal then forget it, if it's bothering you, ask, overthinking won't help.

@YetAnotherHastyNameChange

No, nothing to make me paranoid at all. It just seemed an odd thing to have in a pocket of clearly clean trousers. He does have a fire at his house but he’s at mine at the moment which is a 2 hour drive from his.

Probably for his fire then? We use lighters, matches or even the hob to light ours.

I’ve never touched a cigarette in life.

Cigarettes
Weed
Candles
Annoying hob doesn't spark
Pyromaniac
Had a cheeky cig on a night out and didn't return it to the owner
Arts and crafts

I also have hundreds of the buggers as I’m constantly losing them and have an electric oven so can’t light them off that.

Could it be that he's picked up one of yours before dropping it out his pocket during sex?

Then I felt daft not asking him when I saw him put it away as I thought he’d mention it.

Wouldn't it have been strange for him to be the one that mentions it? 'By the way I have this lighter for x y z...' no? I'm just trying to imagine the setting.
I think it's more natural that you would ask rather than him offer an immediate answer. That wouldn't have been daft. But now you've waited, it's probably going to come across a bit strange...

I use lighters for insense, candles and my cooker. Occasionally pop in my pocket and forget about. Why does it matter though?

Perhaps he was a Scout...always be prepared...

Tooting smack or crack pipes

I haven't smoked for years but have a lighter in my handbag and a couple at home. It's always handy if someone needs a light, plus I have candles etc at home. I think you're way overthinking this.

Hmmmm ..... that’s a two pipe problem ?

DD carries a lighter, she has friends who smoke, also apparently homeless people at the bus so go away if you give them a lighter.

😂 are parents still falling for this shit.

Lighters are very handy to have around, you can use them for lots of reasons. You are the first person I have heard of, who noticed that another person has a lighter in their pocket. I have about 6 lighters in my handbag, and have lost count of how many people have stopped me to ask for a light in the streets,or a park whatever, as they want to light up a ciggy. I sometimes give them a free lighter then.

Dental technician needing to melt wax to make dentures?
To burn the tops off plaits ( this used to happen to me on the school bus)
To see in the dark?
To light a barbecue or fire pit?
To hold above his head at a concert when they play the slow song?

I asked him and he told me it’s because he likes to have a fag on the way back home after he’s seen me. He said he considered himself a non-smoker as he only has one every week or so. Mystery solved.

I've never smoked in my life but I have a lighter. It lights candles, tea-lights, blow torches, sterilises needles to get splinters out. It's just a handy "thing".