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Relationships

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Moving In Together

43 replies

BrazilianBumBum · 09/05/2021 19:49

Considering moving in together after 5 months.. I have 1 DD at Uni (currently home) (19) & 1 DS co-parenting (15). Both great kids!

Other half has 1 DD (23) lives with Grandparent - Her Mother left last year an no relationship with her!! Another great kid!

The thing is... OH DD is not happy with her Dad moving 30 mins (max) away from her an prefers him to rent to stay close!!

I understand it's all change, none of us have ever been in this situation before and our futures look bright together 💕

Any suggestions to prevent anyone being unhappy?

We just want everyone to be happy ❤️

OP posts:
autumnalrain · 09/05/2021 20:00

Is this a troll? 5 months? Obviously way too soon you barely know him!

Blanca87 · 09/05/2021 20:00

5 months is too soon especially with all the other dynamics at play. Enjoy your relationship without the domestic humdrum. Why the rush?

CausingChaos2 · 09/05/2021 20:04

Yes, it’s too soon. Think of your children. They don’t need a man you’ve just met in their home. Take time and get to know him properly first.

LemonTT · 09/05/2021 20:07

@autumnalrain

Is this a troll? 5 months? Obviously way too soon you barely know him!
Five months means they met at the start of lockdown too.
BrazilianBumBum · 09/05/2021 20:31

@Blanca87

5 months is too soon especially with all the other dynamics at play. Enjoy your relationship without the domestic humdrum. Why the rush?
He's selling his house due to divorce! We can support each other and both happy to do so along with spending time together and growing our relationship ❤️ Timing is based on circumstances!
OP posts:
BackforGood · 09/05/2021 20:46

5 months in normal times, without dc, without ex-partners, or any other involved factions would be somewhat hasty.
With all those dc, it is ridiculously hasty.
Add in the fact you've not been able to spend much time together due to lockdown is just daft.

Chamomileteaplease · 09/05/2021 21:06

You have a 15 year old child and frankly sound like you are 15 yourself. Do not make him share a house with a near stranger.

Just don't do it. Let him sell his house and sort himself out. Enjoy your relationship without extra pressures.

category12 · 09/05/2021 21:15

He's selling his house due to divorce! We can support each other and both happy to do so along with spending time together and growing our relationship ❤️ Timing is based on circumstances!

Just because it's convenient doesn't make it a good idea.

You barely know each other.

Twolostsoulsswimminginafishbow · 09/05/2021 21:22

He can rent on his own. I met DH and married him in less than a year (twenty six years ago) but (and it’s a big but) we were young with no baggage. Even then I would say we were very lucky we grew together.
Five months is nothing, you do not know this man.

LittleBirdBlu · 09/05/2021 21:28

Get a grip, you sound like a lovesick teenager! Think of your children for goodness sake. 5 months is nothing you do not know him properly, and moving him in will be a massive mistake!

KarmaIsAnAngel · 09/05/2021 21:30

I don’t understand the timeline here at all sorry. How can you have a fifteen year old child when you’re clearly no older than seventeen or so yourself? Confused

user1471538283 · 09/05/2021 21:33

5 months! Good god!

Lou98 · 09/05/2021 21:35

I moved in with my DP after 6 months together in "normal" times, we were together every day anyway and made sense for us rather than paying two lots of rent etc. However, we were both living alone, neither of us had any children, both were renting so neither of us stood to lose much if things didn't work out. As it happens, things worked out really well, we're still together years later and have our first baby on the way.

I would never have done this if I had kids in the picture though, it isn't fair yours being forced to live with someone they barely know. Also if he's straight out of a divorce I'd be wary about taking it too fast too soon anyway

RantyAnty · 09/05/2021 21:40

Do you own your home?

Why is he divorcing?

TeeBee · 09/05/2021 22:17

I'd give it a couple of years, at least. You're moving a bloke into your child's home. You barely know him, surely, after 5 months. And your child probably knows him even less. Would you be happy for your child to bring a friend home and tell you they were moving in?

TeeBee · 09/05/2021 22:20

Sounds like the best option is for him to rent near his child and for you continue your see each other. All children then happy. The adults are...well...adults and can work around the childrens' needs. That way, you can get up know him properly.

Howshouldibehave · 09/05/2021 22:24

Considering moving in together after 5 months

Errrr. What’s the rush, it sounds like a bad idea?!

RachelRaven · 09/05/2021 22:25

No one falls in love faster than a man who needs a place to stay.

Bananalanacake · 09/05/2021 22:35

I always give it at least 2 or 3 years before moving in. Or did you know each other as friends for years before you got together.

ItsNotLoveActually · 09/05/2021 22:42

Please give your head a wobble - you do not really know this man. It's not just yourselves you need to think of here! Surely he can afford to rent somewhere, even for 6 mths/a year - to really get to know each other.

RestUp · 09/05/2021 22:58

You are being ridiculous. I get that the kids involved are older but 5 months ? Seriously ?

ThisIsStartingToBoreMe · 09/05/2021 23:27

Why are you moving in together?

KaleSlayer · 09/05/2021 23:32

Any suggestions to prevent anyone being unhappy?

I suggest not moving in with someone that you’ve only known for a few months. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Jannetra17 · 10/05/2021 11:28

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

KittyKattyKate · 10/05/2021 12:05

Only 5 months. That’s crackers!

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