Should I or should I not bother with my sister?

[giletrouge]

Dear Wise Mumsnetters – help me decide on this one! It’s my birthday today, I’m 66. That’s just context. I’m pretty introverted and not interested in birthday fuss. I lead quite a quiet life these days with my partner. Got two lovely grown up children and three lovely small grandchildren. Backstory – my family of origin were pretty shit – although I now realise they could in fact have been far worse. But I haven’t seen any of them for years. I’m the youngest (by far) of four girls. Both parents died a long time ago and my oldest sis died a few years ago. My next up from me sis (eight years older) is on Facebook; we are not friends on FB but both aware of each other. Thereby most relevant backstory but without the emotional bits.
So this morning I’m pootling about on Facebook when I get a notification that my sis has shared a photo of mine. I don’t post many pix of myself in fact hardly any, it’s not what I use Fb for. This is therefore a nearly 3 yr old pic. She captions it with (not the exact words) this is my sis, she’s 66 today, we had nothing in common and drifted apart not seen her for thirty years or so x.
It’s fine, I’m not fussed about her saying what she wants and sharing this.
However my impulse is to reply on her post – something like – you may have drifted apart but I made a conscious decision.
Am I mad, just poking a long sleeping bear, totally pointless exercise? Or should I give in to my – admittedly slightly malicious – impulse to chip in my own comment on her post?
One way is dignified silence – the second way is to possibly open it all up – do I really want to even contemplate that level of nonsense?
Thoughts gratefully received, thank you.

I’m not sure she’s being cheeky or manipulative. I think people need to remember she’s mid seventies, she’s probably reminiscing or feeling sad that you’ve been out of each other’s lives for so many decades. The way people act on social media when in their 20s to 50s is different so someone 70-80. It’s a different generation.

Op, if it still hurts ans the emotions are still there, then just leave it. Trying to hurt her or rub salt in the wound serves no purpose now ans benefits no one.

Drifted apart my arse - I left them

That sums up 'why did you go no contact ?' succinctly. Not petty. Not cruel. Just fact.

Dignified silence it is. Let's face it, I'll have forgotten by tomorrow, whereas if I start an argy-bargy who knows where it will end.

In a few days you can feel good that your didn't react. It would be worse if you did respond and she ignored you. You would kick yourself for handing that opportunity to her on a plate. Or worse still a pithy, 'still bitter ?' from her.

She didn't actually manage to wish you a happy birthday in her wangsty post, did she

Nope. It was done to get a reaction as has been said. As has also been said there's better, more private ways to reconnect. It doesn't have to be done publicly. It's not performance art.

When one of my parents died, an estranged relative who somehow found out about the death, decided to put an obituary in the local paper which started with these two words, 'I want

Yeah, that about summed estranged relative up in two words.

OP, you're doing really well with this.

Happy Birthday to you. Now go and get a drink of your choice.

Oh, and btw, what about the other 364 days of the year to contact you ? Oh no, just had to be a nicked social media photo of you posted on social media on your birthday with a, 'poor me, I'm trying hard here' tagline.

Even your birthday had to be about her. Ye gods !

There would not have been anything in it for her if she had contacted you on any other day and would not have had anything else to say either.

Oh no, just had to be a nicked social media photo of you posted on social media on your birthday with a, 'poor me, I'm trying hard here' tagline.
ToffeeNotCoffee thanks you made me laugh!
Sorry to hear about how your relative reacted to your parent's death.