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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

NC with toxic mother

37 replies

Bat96 · 06/04/2021 17:51

Hello,

I suppose this is me asking whether I am being unreasonable.

I cut contact with my mother since I was 18 years old, she is a very toxic person, has caused me a lot of grief in my life.
To cut long story short she split with my father when I was about 8 years old, since then, she's used me as a weapon to hurt his feelings in many different ways, my dad was not allowed to contact or see me, nor was any of his family.
She would refuse to buy me or my brother any new clothes or items needed for school as according to her she did not have any money, but would get lip fillers, hair extensions, permanent make up and many more.
This one time she refused to give me money for shampoo, we run out and I was going to school the next day. She was laughing at me, making comments. I had to go with greasy hair and was bullied that day badly.
She uses to bring different men home all the time, drink and argue with them.

I could go on forever abour her behaviour, she is not a mother material.

As soon as I started working, which was when I was 16, she started stealing money from me. One day I confronted her about it. I was never an argumentative person and never challenged her before or stood up for myself. Whenever she did not like something I did, she woukld give me the silent treatment for many days until I begged her for forgiveness.

After confronting her about the money, we had an argument, I went to work. When I came back, she was clearly tipsy, called me some nasty names and said some hurtful things. All I did was stand and listen. All my things were already bagged up in bin bags and she made it clear she did not want me in the house, I left. Since then I've had no contact.

She blocked me on SM and as she was still texting me abuse, I blocked her number.

Fast forward 7 years, as I still keep in contact with my grandma who is my mom's mum, my mum found out through her that I'm pregnant. She now unblocked me on SM and wants to regain contact, but I do not. My gran was insistent on me speaking to my mom again and kept saying things like, you're too stubborn, she is your mum you should respect her in whatever circumstances.
My mum's new husband has been messaging me on SM telling me I should be talking to her. I feel guilt tripped.

In the past years she has had many opportunities to speak with me, we live in the same time, she has walked past me on the street many times and never even said hello.

All this is messing with my head, she has done a lot more to me than what I've described above, a lot worse things.
Now she, her mother and partner are insisting I forgive her because that's the right thing to do.

I'm not looking for any sympathy I'd just like to know from people who have cut contact with their family members, did you regret not regaining contact when they tried reaching out?

Any advice on how I can handle this?

Many thanks

OP posts:
AbbieLexie · 06/04/2021 17:52

No regret.

Dropdeadfred2 · 06/04/2021 18:00

Just keep doing what you are doing.... also block her husband

Mistystar99 · 06/04/2021 18:03

Block husband, and sadly also your gran. What she is doing to you is not OK. Otherwise you'll get dragged right back in.

Mummyyyyyyyyyy · 06/04/2021 18:07

I would focus on what is best for you and your child.

ratspeaker · 06/04/2021 18:09

Forgiving her is not the right thing to do.
Respect is earned not due to someone under "any circumstances" just because they gave birth to you, she never nurtured or cared for you.
If she was toxic to you imagine what she would be like to a defenceless child, your child.

Has she ever apologised or acknowleged the pain and hurt she caused?
Block her, her partner and warn your gran if she keeps on you will block her too

93sdb · 06/04/2021 18:12

Agree with those above. If she can cause this through other people imagine what she will do 1 to 1.

Unless she comes up with a real heartfelt apology with acknowledging what she has done I wouldn't give her the time of day.

AttilaTheMeerkat · 06/04/2021 18:16

Your mother is not reaching out at all to make any sort of amends. She merely wants to further control you and otherwise draw you back into her dysfunctional world.

I would block her partner, your Nan and your mother. None of these people are at all worth remaining in contact with. Your Nan and partner are being used by your mother as her flying monkeys. Such easily manipulated people are enablers and are not interested in hearing your side of things so their opinion should be ignored.

Do read and post on the well we took you to Stately Homes thread on these Relationships pages. It would also be a good idea for you to read Toxic Parents by Susan Forward.

IggyAce · 06/04/2021 18:16

You & your child have nothing to gain don’t contact her, she gave you a shit childhood, do you want your child to experience anything you went through?
My dh doesn’t speak with his mother hasn’t since before we got married (nearly 20 years ago) our dcs don’t know she exists and therefore have missed out on nothing. They however have been saved from experiencing disappointment and abandonment.

Buttonfm · 06/04/2021 18:17

Agree, stay NC. You are not a bad person for cutting contact. She is the one who has behaved badly.

Don't bring your child into that environment. Listen to your instincts to stay away and to protect your child

They are trying to manipulate you through a sense of guilt and obligation. Ignore them, they are wrong. You don't owe them anything.
Also, I hope you and your brand new family have a lovely life together.

Notaroadrunner · 06/04/2021 18:25

For the sake of your sanity and the welfare of your baby, stay NC. Your gran is being a shit support to you if she thinks you should respect your mother. I'd seriously consider cutting contact with her too. Block your mother everywhere. And definitely block her husband. He has no business involving himself in this at all. Your mother treated you appallingly as a child and she doesn't deserve to get the chance to do that to your baby.

CovidCorvid · 06/04/2021 18:30

Block her dh.
Tell your gran you will stop seeing her if she doesn’t stop guilt tripping you.
Stay strong.

I was NC for the last six years of my mums life, she died recently. No regrets. She kind of reached out with a letter telling me how guilty I should feel for not being a better Dd, etc and how I should get back in touch. No apology from her for her behaviour. So no, I wasn’t tempted.

HarrietSchulenberg · 06/04/2021 18:37

I'm always sceptical when people describe a family member as "toxic", and I usually advocate for some kind of conciliation. From what you've described, however, I think you'd be best off staying no contact, at least for now.

OnTheBenchOfDoom · 06/04/2021 18:38

Stay NC she is not a nice person, she hasn't changed. Why on earth would you want this woman anywhere near you or your baby when he/she arrives?

Just because she is nice to her Mum and her husband does not mean she would be nice to you. All these people are just her "flying monkeys" the ones who do her bidding. If they cannot respect your decision about NC then sadly you need to block them too.

Have you reconnected with your Dad at all?

Goatsgetmygoat · 06/04/2021 18:41

She wants a chance to be a better mother again through her grandchild, to re write history, to prove she was a great mum by being a doting grandma. Honestly I wouldn’t let this happen. Say to your Gran you’ll send pictures etc that you are happy for her to share but that’s it

chestnutmares · 06/04/2021 18:44

Don't do it. From what you've described, you've made the right decision. Parents don't have an automatic right to a relationship with adult children, all relationships should be based on mutual care and respect. Your mother has been appalling to you, why would you want to bring that into your child's life? Don't allow anyone else to guilt-trip you into shifting your boundaries. And be prepared for being emotionally blackmailed - your 'cruel behaviour will be making her ill' etc. Be strong and good luck!

RandomMess · 06/04/2021 18:54

I would reply to her new husband

"I forgive my mother for...

Long list of worst behaviour

Amongst the regular day to day neglect and abuse however I will not tolerate her presence in my child's life. If you continue to contact me I will reporting your for harassment.

MadKittenWoman · 06/04/2021 18:57

Not spoken to my narcissistic mother for years. No regrets. She has ruined my life and that of my sister who was also NC but now has to act as her carer for reasons too complex to go into now.

mbosnz · 06/04/2021 19:28

The right thing to do is not let that poisonous person back into your life, to protect you and your child. I found when I had my babe, it brought up an awful lot of feelings and memories for me, and a hell of a lot of anger towards my mother. You owe that woman nothing.

I'd be having strong hard words with anyone that had the temerity to suggest I owed that woman anything. Block this ghastly woman's new bit on the side from social media, he and his opinion are entirely irrelevant. The very idea!

Robin233 · 06/04/2021 19:59

Is she still drinking ?
You deserve better.
You know what to do.
Live the best life for and your future baby (congratulations by the way).
You certainly don't want her round your baby.
And avoid any 'flying monkeys ' that is ANYONE who would encourage contact with you and your mum, including your grandmother.
Break the chain. Good luck. You're going ti be fine Thanks

MzHz · 06/04/2021 20:04

Don’t open that door
back up

Block your mums h and tell your gm that the condition you will insist upon to remain in contact with her (gm) is that she NEVER EVER interferes again in your relationship or undermines your decisions.

If she can’t abide by that, block her too.

AnotherKrampus · 06/04/2021 21:53

Now is all the more reason to stay NC and block the rest of them. You need to focus on your own family. The woman who has given birth to you is not a mother and you owe her zero. The others were not subjected to all of this abusive behaviour so can fuck right off with their manipulative shit. It hasn't happened to them, so they have no business to interfere.

TobyHouseMan · 07/04/2021 10:26

I can understand other family members trying to get you and her back in contact. For them, they most likely don't know your Mum as you do.

But from what you describe she abused you. She behaved appallingly and from the sounds of its left you with indelible emotional scars.

It's your choice. Make it clear to other family members that when your Mum stole from you and kicked you out at 16 she set up a chain of events that landed you where you are today.

It sounds like you're doing the right thing.

The best way of rising above it is to show her how a good Mum behaves. If it were me I'd keep her toxicity as far away from my kids as I could - will she start with her crap on your kids too?

Good luck with your little one.

littleredberries · 07/04/2021 10:47

Block the husband and your grandmother. Your grandmother obviously does not or cannot respect your wishes.
You need to protect your family, and make even more hard choices.
I've actually done this, so I'm not giving you any advice that I haven't followed myself. I also had/have a toxic mother. Wanted to keep grandparents in my life but they kept passing on information. So now they're out as well. Also, when you become a mother, you'll realise that your child owes you nothing. You brought them into the world, the rest is their choice.
So the people telling you that you owe your mother contact are not good for your family.
You're building your own family. Protect your new family; sacrifice the old one.

BlackAlys · 07/04/2021 12:04

Your mother has a long, long way to go before making up for all her past behaviour - and. by that I mean being utterly transparent, being honest, admitting her shocking treatment of you, getting help for herself, being a decent citizen, saying sorry.

It won't happen thought. It never does.

She has probably spun her version of events to her new husband and given him the 'poor me' line - making her the victim and you the evil daughter. He's fallen for it and is wanting to 'bring you both together for the sake of the grandchild about to be born'.

It's all based on lies.

If it had been her to approach you, on her knees and admitting all her faults, it would be one thing (and I'd still be wary), but it isn't her. She's getting others (flying monkeys) to do her bidding.

Don't fall for it.

You've built a life for yourself and you will be a great Mum because you've seen how 'not' to be.

The hard thing is asking yourself whether your Grandmother is going to compromise your safety, your privacy and your sanity again by trying to put you in touch. Can you 100% guarantee that she won't send pictures of your baby or even allow contact with your baby if you rely on her to babysit for you in future?

Your answer lies there. Trust is everything but more so when your children are involved.

Bat96 · 07/04/2021 13:56

Thank you everyone for your input.

@ratspeaker you've asked if she's ever apologized. When she first reached out, she insisted on having a chat with me so I could explain why I don't bother with her, tell her what she's done to deserve NC, me being naive I thought- great maybe she wants to apologize.
She asked me to tell her my side of what happened, so we went through all the major events, she had an answer to everything somehow managed to make herself the victim.

When I brought up about the time she kicked me out of the house while calling me names such as slt, cnt, she said that I misunderstood as she wasn't swearing at me but to herself in general.

Then I brought up the times she created an email address for me and made me write to my dad after he had left her, bare in mind I was 8, about him having a small di*k and being bad in bed and many worse things, made me sign the emails with my name...
She said that she was protecting me, because he was saying bad things about us.

She said I was the issue because I plucked up the courage to ask for help from one of her friends who came over to see us one day. I embarrassed her.

We spoke about many more and she had a twisted version for every event. She is a good manipulator, so after our chat I felt the guilty one, she made me feel insane thinking I made all up all these things in my head and was unreasonable to reach out for help.
Her version of the events and then pressure from my gran and her husband made me feel like I owe HER an apology.

So no she has never acknowledged her faults, because in her mind, she doesn't have any.

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