Feeling hopeless and wife has just left me to it

[UnitThree]

I've been ill with Covid for weeks and haven't been able to get out of the house. Struggling with energy and needing to sleep a lot.

Honestly, I was feeling overwhelmed with work and just life before I got physically ill and haven't been much fun to be around.

Lots of things are getting to me, but I keep being told by my wife it's just because I don't feel well. Things around the house that need fixing and keeping on top of, apparently I'm just moaning. Neighbours constantly disturbing me all day long is just me whinging. I'm dull and unpleasant and just have a problem with everything. I'm being dramatic to say I feel hopeless and like I have nothing to look forward to. I just shouldn't say it. It's abusive of me to say I see no way out, because I only want her to agree with me and she doesn't, and doesn't want to hear it.

My wife hasn't spoken to me since she said these things and has gone out. I didn't think I could feel worse but I don't know what to do.

I do feel for you op but living with a partner who is constantly negative is very draining. I think you sound depressed, have you sought medical help? I think I would be a lot more sympathetic if you had seen a gp and got ad’s or therapy if you need it. I think also, the person you love telling you that this life is hopeless and have nothing to look forward to is actually quite painful. My dh brings me so much joy, I look forward to seeing him and talking to him every day even just watching a film and having a nice dinner and I like to think that I bring joy and meaning to his life (he tells me I do anyway!) so I would be a bit hurt that life with me was so empty and joyless and if you kept on at me about how shit it all is I’d be inclined to go out and get on too.

I do really feel for you, but please seek some outside help.

It's abusive of me to say I see no way out, because I only want her to agree with me and she doesn't, and doesn't want to hear it.

OP have you been talking, however circumspect, about suicide? Because you need to get to the GP.

I wondered if anyone else was thinking this @MrsTerryPratchett and if in fact OP has been threatening this, it is actually abusive.

OP what is it you want your wife to do?

"Some people have a habbit of (unconciously) unburdening their griefs/dissapointments/bad moods onto others, leaving themselves feeling better but the other person with their stress."

I agree with this. It's supposed to be good to talk if you are depressed and again it's good for the people around you to #bekind. But it all comes at a price and no one has a miracle cure.

Depression needs to be climbed out of, much like addiction. The impetus has to come from the sufferer, no matter how hard it seems.

I agree with other posters that say you say sound depressed, please see your GP. It is a strange time and it sounds like you need some support!

I think it’s unfair to say people are being unsympathetic. We don’t know the OP personally and it may be that the OP was always a rather negative person - they haven’t said, it may just have got worse in the current situation. It’s very harsh saying his wife is being unsympathetic— we can’t hear what’s actually being said or the tone - she may be having a very tough time herself and trying to keep the show on the road—all I can say is the OP clearly not only has long covid but depression that they may have had before covid struck — and that needs the OP to seek outside help

Oh and I’m presuming it's a man-but may not be do of course— the OP hasn’t said—

Sounds like you've been going through a slightly extended rough patch and I hope things feel better for you. I can recommend 7cups.com for a sympathetic ear. I'm sorry you didn't get it from your wife- she may have her own stuff going on that makes it hard for her to deal with your struggle.