My mother was extremely physically abusive (think prisoner of war type of treatment but not reaching death obviously), emotionally abusive, allowed the ongoing sexual abusive of me for 9 years and when I would tell her she would physically assault me, psychologically abusive etc.
We didn't know any different, I loved her despite all these things and couldn't have dreamed of ever telling anyone what was going on.
My mother would tell us she was going to hang herself as we were leaving for school and she would say 'if the door is closed when you get home don't come in, just call the police'. I look back and wonder how I was able to go to school and no one ever questioned if I was all ok at home, I had one set of clothes and one set of undies for 3 years, I wore them every day and night.
My mother acknowledges the physical abuse but says 'what else was I supposed to do?'
My grandmother was a very hard working, refined woman. My mother had a very privileged childhood, by both their accounts.
My mother had kids young, all 5 to different men, she didn't finish school, never worked, there was nothing. My grandmother has purchased 5 houses for my mother over her life, countless cars, given her tens of thousands of dollars when she's needed it. My mother has trashed every car, house and blown the money on things like holidays for herself and men that she was sleeping with.
As kids she would starve us, we were rarely allowed to eat, we would steal our neighbours macadamia nuts of their trees, eat flowers, yabbies.
I don't understand why my mother's turned out the way she has.
To this day she will try to ruin things for her kids, if we get a new job, new relationships etc anything we do she will try to ruin so that we have nothing.
She cannot allow us happiness.
Everyone thinks she's golden, she's so perfect at being a fake church going citizen its mind blowing