Gf recieveing message from other guys.

[Notquitethere01]

I don't know if I'm overreacting or am I right to feel a bit weird about this?
My gf asked me to read out something on her phone to her and as I did, a message came through from instagram from a guy replying to a story she had posted. This guy is someone I know about and who she has openly told me she talked to before we got together. She went almost embarrassed when it happened but I kept quiet and didn't make a big deal out of it. I know this guy has reacted or responded to her stories before because she has told me. However, it made me feel really quite uneasy yesterday.

After what happened she has really stepped up her loving side, hugging me, kissing me, telling me how much she loves me etc. Said I'm her soul mate etc.

A few hours later I told her that the message unsettled me, like it would if I had one from a girl. I guess what is going through my mind is if she has been messaging him back and forth and I don't know about it. But I have zero evidence of that.

She told me she knew I had something on my mind and she promised me that (quite sincerely) that she would never do anything to break what he had. I told her that I trust her and that's all I can do.

Am I right to be worrying about this? I guess I can't be sure 100% but I have to trust her until proven otherwise?

[Alexandernevermind]

You are showing a huge red flag @Notquitethere01.

[Notquitethere01]

@Alexandernevermind why is that?

I'm merely asking a question as to whether I should be worried or not but seem to be getting all manner of responses that I have done somethong wrong. Imagine it the other way around and you saw your husband/boyfriend/ girlfriend/ wife/ partner getting messages from anothher guy.

[Alexandernevermind]

The red flag comment is because this does not sound like a healthy relationship.
One scenario (the one I am leaning towards) is that you are jealous and controlling. You saw that a male had commented on her photograph and she became flustered when challenged, panicking about your reaction. She felt she had to be OTT in reassuring you everything was fine. The fact that you questioned her about a man making a comment is odd, and her reaction could be that she knew you would over react.
The second scenario is that your 6th sense was right and him commenting "looking good" meant they were at it, which on the face of it is bonkers, but her reaction and the fact there is already an element of you not trusting her means something is off.
My DH and I speak to people of the opposite sex all the time and it means nothing, its fine, even when its jokey flirty. We trust each other.

[Wanderlusto]

[quote Notquitethere01]@Alexandernevermind why is that?

I'm merely asking a question as to whether I should be worried or not but seem to be getting all manner of responses that I have done somethong wrong. Imagine it the other way around and you saw your husband/boyfriend/ girlfriend/ wife/ partner getting messages from anothher guy.[/quote]
It's not a message though OP. It's a comment on a public forum.

If she was texting the guy then maybe there would be an issue. But what actually happened was he posted on a public photo and by the sounds of it, she didnt even reply.

And now it sounds like she is going out of her way to reassure you. Maybe because she is attuned to the fact that you are all insecure and potentially, needy as fuck.

[goldielockdown2]

Imagine it the other way round

Well yeah, no one else finds it a concern. You've got post after post telling you so. What exactly is your worry here?

[AryaStarkWolf]

[quote Notquitethere01]@Alexandernevermind why is that?

I'm merely asking a question as to whether I should be worried or not but seem to be getting all manner of responses that I have done somethong wrong. Imagine it the other way around and you saw your husband/boyfriend/ girlfriend/ wife/ partner getting messages from anothher guy.[/quote]
He posted a comment on a picture she posted of a cup of tea though, he didn't send her a message, are only her female followers allowed to comment on photograph she posts?, it would be exactly the same if it were a woman commenting on a mans photo, it isn't a message and there was no flirtatiousness to it, it's a cup of tea!! Tea isn't sexy

[Notquitethere01]

@aryastarkwolf no it was a direct message into her inbox. They have messaged before and she told me that she was attracted to him.

[Wanderlusto]

[quote Notquitethere01]@aryastarkwolf no it was a direct message into her inbox. They have messaged before and she told me that she was attracted to him.[/quote]
Did she reply?

[AryaStarkWolf]

[quote Notquitethere01]@aryastarkwolf no it was a direct message into her inbox. They have messaged before and she told me that she was attracted to him.[/quote]
But you said he was replying to an Instagram story and he said the tea looked good?

[Alexandernevermind]

Your story has changes slightly, or the original post wasn't entirely clear. Cut the poor woman some slack and either trust her or end it. There really is no in between.

[Alexandernevermind]

*changed