He said I'm too needy..

[PandaEyes00]

Just that really and it fucking hurt.
I like kisses and cuddles I love him for christ sake why wouldn't I enjoy kisses and cuddles with the love of my life.
It's not constant, not like I'm always in his face.
A kiss before we leave for work, a kiss when we get home and sometimes cuddles while we're watching a film.
I'm I too needy or is he just being a prick?

As some female PP have already said, this isn’t an exclusively male preference.

My previous GF had a very strong aversion (I’d almost call it a horror) about holding hands in public. And hugging or kissing at home were vanishingly rare.

I’m fairly sure she would have called me needy, but TBF I thought she was emotionally unavailable. Reader, I didn’t marry her.

If my dp called me needy for just having a kiss and the occasional cuddle on the sofa id make sure I backed right off and just let him do all the running.
Then I'd give it a while and then get rid

@Trisolaris

Having different levels of what physical affection you desire is one thing but what is not nice is him using the word ‘needy’ which implies there is something wrong with you for being a physically affectionate person. It’s like saying all people with a high sex drive are perverts or sex pests because you personally don’t want to have sex as often as they do.

Hmm, I'm not sure about this.

Speaking as someone who's not huge on physical affection, I would definitely find it "needy" to need daily cuddles on the sofa. I don't need that level of affection or reassurance in a relationship and I'd find it quite overwhelming if someone did, in all honesty.

I don't think calling someone needy is in any way comparable to calling someone a pervert or a sex pest, either.

Accepting that there is such a thing as 'too needy' is to accept that there is a rulebook about how needy we are all 'allowed' to be: There isn't.

You are as needy as you are. I am as needy as I am. He is as needy as he is. We are all more needy than some people, and less needy than others. So. You're not 'too needy'. There's nothing wrong with your level of neediness. Relationships need need. It's not an unhealthy thing.

When it's unhealthy is when people's levels of need don't match. He only said half of the sentence he meant. He meant to say 'You are too needy for me.' Which changes the picture a bit, because it stops the issue being your fault, and becomes more of a relationship issue/potential incompatibility. Nobody has done anything wrong, but you need something perfectly reasonable, and he perfectly reasonably doesn't want to provide you with it.

I think there is a problem with the way he has communicated this to you, though. Have you told him how much he hurt you? And if so, how did he respond?

It is horrible being told you're too needy. Ugh. I feel for you. Just keep reminding yourself that there's no such thing, and that even if you were in his face all the time, that would be ok in many relationships. IT'S NOT YOU.

It only gets worse (I speak from bitter experience). Cut your losses....