Threads

Topics

Usernames

Mumsnet Logo
Please
or
to access all these features

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support.

Men don't want to be loved, they want to be liked. Would you agree with this statement?
55

Jenny215 · 22/02/2021 17:22

Well my question says it all really. It's made me rethink things, is it really true?

OP's posts:
Please
or
to access all these features

LApprentiSorcier · 22/02/2021 17:23

Sorry, I think it's nonsense.

Please
or
to access all these features

PlanDeRaccordement · 22/02/2021 17:24

My DH says this is nonsense.

Please
or
to access all these features

BaggoMcoys · 22/02/2021 17:25

I was once told a similar-ish saying:

Men want to be respected, women want to be loved.

I said it was bollocks and that both men and women generally want to be loved and respected, and that I don't think it's really love if there is no respect. And I still agree with myself.

Please
or
to access all these features

Branleuse · 22/02/2021 17:27

im sure most people want both

Please
or
to access all these features

AnneLovesGilbert · 22/02/2021 17:29

Can’t they have both? I’ve never loved a man I didn’t like.

Where did you hear this and what do you think it means?

Please
or
to access all these features

Jenny215 · 22/02/2021 17:33

Apparently it means men care more about feeling liked by their woman than loved.
I suppose it could mean fancying them, wanting them sexually, appreciating them. They don't care for romantic gestures etc.

OP's posts:
Please
or
to access all these features

AnneLovesGilbert · 22/02/2021 17:34

Men are nearly half the population. It’s always foolish to talk about them like they’re all identical.

Please
or
to access all these features

Shinyletsbebadguys · 22/02/2021 17:39

Not for my DF , he knows that there are things that I don't like (but understand and accept ) about him as there are many about me he doesn't like. We both accept that we are in a lifelong relationship with a flawed human being (because we all are) but we love each other despite those occasional dislikes.

Please
or
to access all these features

JustAnotherOldMan · 22/02/2021 18:21

No it’s bollocks, of course men want to be loved and wanted and needed, we are all people after all.
It’s Just that most men don’t really go in for a Jane Austin idea of romantic love

Please
or
to access all these features

Bookriddle · 22/02/2021 19:18

As a bloke, I personally feel this is bollocks! I want to be lived(thankfully am)

Please
or
to access all these features

Eckhart · 22/02/2021 19:20

Horrible generalisation. How would you like to be lumped in with 'what women like'?

Please
or
to access all these features

user1481840227 · 22/02/2021 20:47

@Jenny215

Apparently it means men care more about feeling liked by their woman than loved.
I suppose it could mean fancying them, wanting them sexually, appreciating them. They don't care for romantic gestures etc.

It doesn't really make any sense.

Fancying them and wanting them sexually would be more likely to make someone feel loved within a relationship, not liked.

Or some men want to be lusted after but wouldn't care too much if they were liked or loved so it could be a standalone category.

Also being appreciated would be more likely to make you feel loved than liked.

So I don't really understand what they mean by liked...but most men are annoying so I don't think they care too much about being liked lol
Please
or
to access all these features

Susie477 · 22/02/2021 20:49

Any generalisation about 50% of the population of the planet is silly.

Please
or
to access all these features

fantasmasgoria1 · 22/02/2021 20:51

My Fiance says he prefers to be loved. After years of marriage and other relationships where he did not feel loved that's what he really wanted. He gets love in spades because he's awesome!

Please
or
to access all these features

Ritascornershop · 22/02/2021 20:52

Good god no. Of course they want to be loved. A difference I do note is how they interpret gestures of love (as much as we can generalize about “all men”). I think for more men than women they interpret a dip in the amount of sex as meaning love has dipped too.

Please
or
to access all these features

Jackie2022 · 22/02/2021 20:56

Not really. Men do tend to be comfortable with casual no strings dating, but as can women.

Also a man can get jealous if a new potential partner likes another man more than they like him, suggesting being merely liked isn’t enough for him and he wants more. There’s definitely men that want more from a relationship than sex or “being liked”

Please
or
to access all these features

Jackie2022 · 22/02/2021 20:59

Another example, there’s plenty of famous, successful or wealthy men that don’t want to date a woman that wants him for his popularity/money/to benefit from his success etc. They prefer a woman that loves him for him rather than likes what he can offer them.

Likewise there’s many men that wouldn’t care and think a vagina is a vagina 🤷🏼‍♀️ You can’t really generalise

Please
or
to access all these features

OchreBlue · 22/02/2021 21:02

What has it made you re-think?

Please
or
to access all these features

Marineboy67 · 22/02/2021 21:04

As a man that's just rubbish. Of course we want to feel loved. Doesn't everyone? Really can't understand the source or foundation behind a statement like that, I've certainly never heard it said before.

Please
or
to access all these features

Shoxfordian · 22/02/2021 21:14

It doesn’t really make any sense op

Please
or
to access all these features

helpmeoutMN · 22/02/2021 21:32

My husband definitely wants both

Please
or
to access all these features

NoMackerelInSwindon · 22/02/2021 23:33

Men generally want the same things as women, apart from toilet seat lids.

Please
or
to access all these features

NotMyPremium · 22/02/2021 23:54

DP wants me to love him, like him and respect him. He also loves the little gestures I make that show him I love him.

His ex did none of thise things. She didn't respect him, she didn't love him and I doubt she really liked him that much. It's crippled his MH at times to have been treated like that by his long term partner.

So no, it's total rubbish. Men aren't a different species. They want many of the same things that women want.

Please
or
to access all these features

oil0W0lio · 22/02/2021 23:58

But but.... I thought men were from alpha centauri and women were from Aquarius 🤷🏼‍♀️

Please
or
to access all these features

Fabiofatshaft · 23/02/2021 00:23

Another bollocks from me.

Please
or
to access all these features
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.