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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Professional cuddling

32 replies

emzyemzy · 21/02/2021 21:45

I'm a single mum of two SEN children and I work full time and care for my DF who has various problems, my last relationship was over a year ago and was for 7yrs, however for lots of reasons affection was sporadic at best (that's the background)
Now to the current issue
I miss cuddles/hugs/warmth, I'm not in a position to have a relationship, I'm not interested in a sexual relationship, I just need a cuddle

Maybe that sounds a bit sad, I obviously hug my children and that's amazing and I wouldn't change it for the world, I don't know, I needed to write in down after spending half hour exploring professional cuddling services, but obviously in current times a no, and tbh I'm probably a bit cynical around paying for a hug etc

I don't know, if you read thankyou, please be kind

OP posts:
Boopeedoop · 21/02/2021 21:52

If it wasn't covid, and you lived near me, I would hug you for free. I love a cuddle xx

WilsonMilson · 21/02/2021 21:56

Sending big virtual hugs op. We all need to feel cared for and loved.

emzyemzy · 21/02/2021 22:02

@Boopeedoop @WilsonMilson
Thankyou for being kind, sometimes just helps to get the thoughts out, back to work tomorrow after the half term so will be busy atleast

OP posts:
Fortunefavours1 · 21/02/2021 23:28

I'm a single mum, haven't had a cuddle in years, i miss it ever so much. Dc aren't the huggy type. I know what you mean. I get a lump in my throat thinking of getting a tight hug.

emzyemzy · 23/02/2021 08:12

@Fortunefavours1 it gets you at the worst times as well, sometimes I could well up just from thinking what a difference a hug could make

OP posts:
olympicsrock · 23/02/2021 08:15

I’m sending you a great big squeezy hug! Xx

emzyemzy · 23/02/2021 17:23

@olympicsrock thankyou Smile

OP posts:
EarthSight · 23/02/2021 19:53

Sending you a pink, candyflossy hazy cloud of a hug 😊

iklboo · 23/02/2021 19:56

((((((HUG))))))

Professional cuddling
Nsky · 23/02/2021 19:59

Cats are fab

purpleme12 · 23/02/2021 20:05

Yes I get it
Also single
I'm so irritable and not as happy and not as relaxed and I'm sure it's cos I'm not getting cuddles partly
I haven't had a cuddle since October when I saw my mate
I'm working from home so can't cuddle anyone at work
😔

cheeseismydownfall · 23/02/2021 20:07

Would a really good massage fulfill something of what you need, OP?

My best hug ever was from a osteopath. She was both strong and comforting at the same time, and she wrapped her arms around me to release my spine in this really deep squeeze. It was amazing! If the osteopathy ever stopped working for her she could totally reinvent herself as a professional hugger!

luckiestgirl · 23/02/2021 20:19

I’d book a bodyworker or somatic healer or a sex worker. I’m sure they’ve done stranger things than just hug someone for an hour

RosyPrimroseDoll · 23/02/2021 20:36

Where is themadhugger when you need them?!?
Sending you a huge hug!

Corcra · 23/02/2021 22:21

I felt so sad reading your op. A hug seems like minimum you deserve. I wish happiness and hugs for you 🤗 💗

Treehops · 23/02/2021 22:56

I used to do Brazillian Jiu Jitsu - grappling basically, which is very full on physical contact, smothering at times. Everyone would be elatedly grinning afterwards, for lots of reasons, exercise but also physical contact. One of the charming things about it was these guys who had been rolling for years and had broken down barriers of physical contact and just would casually playfight in conversation or literally flop on each other and chat. Like kids do. Obviously only in that context (unless they were allowed out in public with alcohol, ha) It's an innate human need. I got injured and stopped going but still keep in touch with some of the guys, it was ace. And funnily enough now, if my little boy is full of energy at bedtime we play guard game and end up giggling and happy. Playfighting, hugging, it's all so human. I have a hug list for after all of this. I like to think of all the people I'm going to greet like I've just come off a flight. Running jump style. Grin

Treehops · 23/02/2021 22:57

I hope after all this you have someone who hugs you like they've just come off a long flight and they're so, so happy to be with you again.

Onsiesarethenewblack · 23/02/2021 23:16

@Treehops I used to do the same sport until covid killed it. Its not something I would ever be interested in on paper - I like my personal space and I'm not normally interested in fighting - but I found it really addictive. After learning more about it I wondered if part of the 'addiction' was the physical contact, I think it fulfills a very human need, even if it's not one I consciously wanted!

oil0W0lio · 23/02/2021 23:25

I want to do jiu jitsu too🤩 it sounds ace

Flamingosarentreal · 23/02/2021 23:39

I miss my dance classes for similar reasons. Hugs to those missing them.

DianaT1969 · 23/02/2021 23:48

It's not a substitute for hugs, but reflexology on the feet and massage is great for connecting like this.

PreyingMantlepiece · 24/02/2021 00:13

It's not the same, but a weighted blanket sort of helps just a little.

I'm a cuddler, but am funny about who I'm cuddling. But I miss cuddling up with friends.

I have one very very huggy nine year old, a weighted blanket, and one of my ferrets likes to lick my face and nose. At bedtime I've got a very big old Ikea tiger (they made this kind ten years ago) and I often wake up spooning it. Ahem.

I do have an OH. He's just got shit personal hygiene and if he tries to hug me he leans his huge weight onto me and he has put my back out this way, so...

Woolwichgirl · 24/02/2021 00:31

Sending you (((virtual hugs)))🤗

I felt like this for a few years until I had a baby last yr..Hes now my cuddly little partner☺

How about paying for a full body massage?.Do you think that will help?

All the best OP.xx

Docketpuo · 24/02/2021 00:34

Hugs to all who need them.

MorriseysGladioli · 24/02/2021 00:36

I used to love snuggling up on my exes chest and being cuddled up.

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