How long is on yr mortgage OP? Both you and DH have policies in force to protect your mortgage. At present, If your DH passes during mortgage term your mortgage will be paid off as per the policies you have in place. His work death in service is an additional benefit.
So you are saying you want your mortgage paid off ( taken care of with mortgage life assurance) and then an additional lump sum to replace your husbands death in service benefit ,if he dies when he has left work?
If your DH dies before mortgage paid off, his life assurance will pay out, clearing mortgage. You will then have full ownership of property and property paid. If he dies having retired your property will still be paid for. If he dies while in employment your mortgage will be paid and you will receive a lump sum from his employers.
Are you now saying that you would like another sum of money available to you upon his death should he die,once he has left work?
These policies cost money. How much money do you think you will need OP once he is dead and you own house outright?
If your DH does not want you take out any additional cover on his life, i would respect that. He has put in place enough to secure you and your children by securing your home.
I have exact same in place, that your DH does and i am single parent. My DC's will inherit house upon my death, ( insurance will pay any outstanding mortgage ) my savings and any death in service , if applicable. My children can sell my house, release the money and use it to buy their own homes.
What more money do you want from your DH? You have a job and work so can support yourself. How much more money do you need?
I have noticed in your posts a lack of affection for your DH. You have complained about possible house downsize if he dies. You do not refer to your "DH" particularly affectionally .
As by your own admission you will live longer, maybe you put in place finances to secure your own future and not rely on the death of your DH?