Friend keeps flirting with my husband

[Mumof2222]

So, I have this good friend who everyone loves and thinks is very loyal which is why this concerns me so much..

In the 15years me and my husband have been married I have never felt that he has crossed a line with an other woman or ever felt uncomfortable around other women. We have never ever argued about our relationship and are very close.

This one friend I did recently notice that she was being very touchy feely with my husband and it made me feel uncomfortable, i mentioned to my husband who said he hadn't noticed but would keep his distance.

This weekend he had to take our son for a party at her house and i was unable to go as i had to take our daughter elsewhere. He left his phone at home and I had texts from her later in the day asking me to go over for wine after the party, so we headed over..

I got there for her to tell me that she was glad i had turned up as my husband had far too much to drink and i needed to drive!

My husband looked fine, didn't look drunk at all.... said he only had 2 beers and was fine. She then in front of me and others whispered in my husbands ear and giggled and then lent around him whilst rubbing his back to grab her phone.

She then when we got home, texted my husband to say that she hoped she hadn't got him into trouble! She then text him again in the morning about something else.. my husband showed me and didn't reply.

Me and my husband have spoken about it and i told him how much it uspets me and he is making steps to not put himself in that situation again but i just wanted to get your thoughts...

Would you say something to my friend? be worried they are cheating??

Text her husband and tell her you're tired of seeing her hitting on your husband and could he have a word?

@Hotcuppatea
No didn't think of that 😵🤣🤭

Sounds like she's quite interested in your hubby and also trying to create a bit of friction between you. Keep your distance.

OP is in NZ. Read the thread before you let the accusations fly about lockdown.

@ProseccoLush & @SleepingStandingUp
There's always one isn't there who has to lecture on the covid/lockdown rules instead of sticking to the point of the thread 🙄

@SummerWhisper

How did he react when she rubbed his back?

He should have just burped.

OP, your husband doesn't seem to be very cognisant of what goes on around him. He said he would be more watchful. That said, it's your friend's behaviour that is bugging you, not his. I would distance myself from it because even if your husband tells her to knock it off, you won't find the friendship on the footing it was before.

She's no friend of yours and I'd be telling her to cut it out as her behaviour is making her look ridiculous.

I would call her bluff, just say "hubby's in the shower but asked me to text back - of course he's not in trouble, our relationship isn't like that. It did look like you'd had a bit to drink though! Don't worry, we all get silly sometimes"

I would be keeping my distance emotionally and calling her out subtly. She'll send on realise your DH is a no-go zone.

If it did continue, then I'd ask her how her marriage is as you've noticed she'd a bit flirty with other husband's and wondered if she's ok. That should stop her.

This woman is not your friend. My ex best friend -note the ex- of 25 years used to flirt with my husband. She eventually married and her husband bears more than a resemblance to my husband in looks.
Anyway, my point is it doesn’t matter how long you are best friends with someone, once they make a move on your husband that’s it! Friendship over, and when other friends/family point it out and she buys herself a copy of your engagement ring and wedding ring, time to get rid.

[quote 2021isgoingtobeasshitas2020]@Hotcuppatea
No didn't think of that 😵🤣🤭[/quote]
And that if you read her posts, she tells you she's in NZ.

OP. You don't have to confront. Just block and avoid.

I’d limit contact. She could be one of those who gets bored and flirts but it’s a shitty thing in a friend. Limit what she sees on social media from you and it sounds like your dh has blocked her which is good.

If it's a small town and you don't like confrontation just phase her out.

Agree with your DH he doesn't reply to her any more and leave it a few hours or a day or so before you reply and be non committal.
Don't go round there and be 'busy' if she invites you or DH anywhere.

I had a 'friend' like this once. She actually dyed her hair the very same shade as mine at the time (found the box dye in my bathroom and bought the same) got the same haircut, bought the exact same clothes I did and flirted heavily with my XH (who was appalled) and once even asked me when she was drunk "What would you say if I fucked your husband"
When I told him what she said he replied "There are dogs I would rather shag than her". She had form for cheating on her partner (now her DH) and he showed me texts she had sent other men soliciting for sex and proved she had cheated. In fact they were together because she cheated on her XH with him
FWIW I don't believe she ever managed to do anything with my XH but not for want of trying and she is no longer my friend, I am no longer the naive fool who thought she was just a bit messed up and harmless.
Fuck this woman off from your life. She isn't your friend.