I have a boyfriend who finds himself very difficult to express his feelings. I can see he is happy when he has a nice meal though. He once told me that I am an emotional person and emotions are a waste. Divorced after 17 years of marriage from a cheater wife, had some girlfriends before and after but never been in love with a woman but he said he doesn’t want to live alone.
He is still actively hiding me from his family, said we only introduce a woman for marriage. (I know the culture difference but it hurts)
From his reactions and how he deals with the relationship issues, he seemed quite selfish and talks very blunt so I got hurt a lot at the very beginning when we were learning to know each other but then again I feel that his selfishness is because he doesn’t know how to approach to talk about the odd situations and sudden events that could hurt me? or simply don’t think that further?
He never touches me or holds my hands ever first even in bed he just cannot show his affection at all as if he does not know anything so you do all but he really likes me being next to him, touching him, holding his hands, anything.
Other than his character, he is very successful and has an honourable job. His work is his whole life, nothing else. I honestly cannot believe that he was once in a marriage for 17 years because I have found it very difficult with him, maybe me? I don’t know. I almost broke up with him a couple of times and could have left his house straight away but I didn’t and he hugged me so hard next morning ( this means “ thank you for staying/bearing with me, omg, I want to cryðŸ˜)
I have kept telling him what I want him to do and how I want to be treated with clear instructions but I know it may be impossible for him to change especially in his age. and I feel that he won’t be happy to hear it all the time. He told me that too much negativity isn’t good but he didn’t say any further. So I know he still wants me.
I love him so much. I am now kind of getting used to him and learned to understand and ignore but still very hard.
Are some men too difficult to express their feelings? Anyone has this problem? I guess if someone’s character is like my boyfriend, they won’t be here because they can’t express anyway.