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Original poster

disinheriting spouse

79 replies

savethatkitty · 05/02/2021 12:20

Background - DH & I have always kept separate finances, due to him being useless with money and me not. During our marriage, all property and assets have been saved for and purchased by me, in my name only, from years of saving by me. DH has contributed nothing to savings or purchasing of property/assets.

When I die, I don't want him to inherit or profit from my estate. Instead I want our 2 DD to benefit from my estate. That is the whole reason I am investing and buying property, so that one day they may benefit.

Has anybody else done this. Does it hold up legally?

OP posts:

2021vision · 05/02/2021 19:23

Same as Fifthtimelucky, life interest in house for DP and everything else to the children. The reason? I want my money to go to my children, not potentially some other woman and her children.

Molecule · 05/02/2021 19:24

My ex, note the word “ex” did this

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/legal_matters/2603826-Could-I-contest-DHs-will?msgid=60392327

I divorced him.

And funnily enough I’m not destitute, I have an income from the assets and seem to have coped quite admirably without him.

4Mongrels · 05/02/2021 19:25

If he divorces you then he would be entitled to a share of the marital pot, of which all your investments would be considered part of.

Have the two of you discussed your plans? If not it seems very cruel. Should you die prior to him, your actions may make him question how you felt about him and your entire relationship but you won’t be around to explain things.

Chiccie · 05/02/2021 19:28

I don’t understand this. I thought that if you’d been married a long time that (for example) if you got divorced, you’d automatically get half of all assets regardless of what name they are in. Why wouldn’t that be the same if one of the couple dies?? So he’d be better off to divorce you?

CayrolBaaaskin · 05/02/2021 19:29

You can leave all of your estate to your dc in English law. Your spouse may challenge this but he won’t necessarily succeed.

In Scotland your spouse has a right to one third of your moveable estate (so not including houses or land) but otherwise can be disinherited.

Get legal advice on your circumstances but no reason you can’t do that.

morninglive · 05/02/2021 19:36

It won't hold up legally, I can assure you of that. Unless the marriage is exceptionally short?

I suggest you see a solicitor to see if you can give your DH a lifetime trust in the house, and for it to be divided equally between the DDs on his death. He should have a mirror will.

Do not try to write a will without legal advice in the hope it will go through according to your wishes. Your DDs will likely end up with less. My BIL is in a similar position to your DH with 2 DDs from his late wife's 2nd marriage. He is challenging her will and we have been assured (as much as anyone can) that he has a claim under the inheritance act.

Try asking this question in Legal matters.

How long is the marriage?

bluebluezoo · 05/02/2021 19:49

My BIL is in a similar position to your DH with 2 DDs from his late wife's 2nd marriage. He is challenging her will and we have been assured (as much as anyone can) that he has a claim under the inheritance act

Can you clarify please? Your sil has left everything to her children? From their marriage or a different one? Has she cut your bil out completely?

peak2021 · 05/02/2021 19:49

Seek legal advice. One option I would enquire about would be for ownership to transfer to our DDs.

eaglejulesk · 05/02/2021 19:55

You sound horrible tbh and if I found out my spouse was thinking along these lines I would be heading for the divorce court. Imagine what the response would be if a man was posting this about his wife.

Chiccie · 05/02/2021 19:57

@Molecule wow! Good for you! Did you get half? How did he take the news? Are you happier now?

Belinda554 · 05/02/2021 20:01

Fucking awful behaviour for a spouse. Marriage is 50/50. If you’re not happy with that divorce.
Trying to steal from your spouse is abhorrent.
I couldn’t give a shit what you think about his/her desires or ability to manage money. All of the money in a marital pot is joint!

bluebluezoo · 05/02/2021 20:03

You sound horrible tbh and if I found out my spouse was thinking along these lines I would be heading for the divorce court. Imagine what the response would be if a man was posting this about his wife

Actually the idea that a man would leave his estate to his 2nd wife and not to children from his first marriage crops up fairly often on here. And is not looked upon favourably.

bluebluezoo · 05/02/2021 20:05

And if your spouse remarried and left everything to his new wife, so your kids got nothing?

Branleuse · 05/02/2021 20:06

Defeats the point of being married surely?

morninglive · 05/02/2021 20:13

@bluebluezoo I don't want to clarify if but it is similar to the OPs question.

bluebluezoo · 05/02/2021 20:18

Defeats the point of being married surely?

Yes and no. As is often said on here, get married, protection, blah blah.

What most people don't consider is that if you’re a woman with your own assets, house, savings, pension etc, marrying a man in a lesser financial situation actually completely fucks you over, and you are effectively giving him half of everything you own.

I naively thought that I would keep my house and everything else I brought into the marriage.

So I have a will leaving things to my children. I still fear that my will might be contested and my children will be partly if not fully disinherited.

My mum inherited a very large estate from my dad. Enough she’s never had to work. I will never see a penny as it will all be spent soon.

This day and age with people living longer and the cost of houses, remarriage, care etc it’s worth considering whether you want to leave everything to a spouse or make sure your children at least get something.

millymollymoomoo · 05/02/2021 20:32

We did this
Changed the house to tenants in common. My share goes to the kids held in trust and he has lifetime interest to live their till a certain point
Pension goes to him
Other assets I own go into kids trust

His will mirrors mine

harknesswitch · 05/02/2021 21:05

If it's in your name and you place it in a will then it doesn't matter if you're married or not. Your will is what's adhered to

Lurcherloves · 05/02/2021 21:06

If you die first and remain married at the time of your death your husband will have a strong claim against your estate if you have not made provision for him. The best way of dealing with this (do you love him at all???) is to allow him to have the benefit of the property/ assets for his life passing to your children on his death. This is a trust arrangement.
I actually feel sorry for spouses in this situation, if you think so little of him let him go and create a genuine life elsewhere

harknesswitch · 05/02/2021 21:06

If you get divorced it doesn't matter who's name it's in, it's the classed as a marital asset.

But if you die and it's on your name, then the will is what's important and it doesn't matter if you're married or not

Oblomov21 · 05/02/2021 21:09

Do you not love him at all.
Won't he contest it? I would.

morninglive · 05/02/2021 21:29

@harknesswitch

If you get divorced it doesn't matter who's name it's in, it's the classed as a marital asset.

But if you die and it's on your name, then the will is what's important and it doesn't matter if you're married or not

This is bollox. The Inheritance act 1975 is there for just this inequity

Ibizafun · 05/02/2021 21:29

Belinda554 When you say all the money in a marital pot is joint, what about for the example in a second marriage, no children together and only one person has created that pot? Still equal?

LivBa · 05/02/2021 21:31

What would your children think of this plan to disinherit their own dad?

Ibizafun · 05/02/2021 21:34

harknesswitch But what about assets which are bought by one person but not listed in either will, such as art? Do they automatically transfer to the remaining spouse upon death?

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