Being called a Good Girl?

[Lullaby88]

Would you be offended if you were a 33 year old woman and someone who was an aunty called you a good girl for doing something? It kind of annoys me but dont know if im being too sensitive?

A midwife called me “good girl” during labour ...apparently I hissed “I am not a f Labrador” at her

The more I've read the more sensitive you seem. If that's all your mil has done which amounts to a few clumsy turn of phrases it seems incredibly self indulgent to blank her and harbour this level of ill feeling. I don't know whether there is more to this story and your dynamic or that's just it but if it is I think you may need to put your pettiness to the side. In 5 years time this sort of niggly stuff wont matter, I think she probably doesn't reach out to you because you seem to have made it abundantly clear you dislike her. Sorry OP but I'm struggling to see the issue from your pov

I feel very sorry for your MIL who has to cope with your perceived slights.

You sound like very hard work and I couldn’t be bothered to even waste my time with somebody like you.

You must be absolutely bloody perfect op if you have never said the wrong thing to somebody in your entire life.

Sorry to jump on this post, but I'm new to this group. I'm like to make a new post but it's not allowing me to. What do I need to do.

@Emz04, if you want to reply on this thread, click on Reply at bottom right.
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Another MIL bashing thread.

She sounds lovely. You sound nuts.

One day you are probably going to be the MIL.

Are you going to get everything right?

My nan calls me a "good girl" on the odd occasion I 'cook dinner for.my DH' it's infuriating but makes me feel like I'm doing my duty he cooks around 95% of the time

It is nice to see someone open to taking different perspectives on board.
You wrote that sometimes you like her for things, other times you don't. You don't have to like her or dislike her, it isn't a school friendship. You just need to be able to accept how she is. She sounds fine although she does get under your skin a little, but nothing that warrants a phone call after the event. The not bothering you could stem from her knowing that she irritates you (people don't always hide it well) and her not wanting to say the wrong thing.

You have a "dark place" where your mil called you "good girl" and you looked at her funny. Wow 🤩

Your poor MIL, why are you looking for problems?

My fabulous MIL (89) often says ‘oh you’re such a good girl’ when I’ve done something ‘good’, she accompanies it with a stroke of my hair etc. I love it. It’s meant with affection.

I’m 56!

My mum, 90, says that sort of thing about her, adult, grand daughters and my sister.

She simply means it as it comes out - not particularly in a patronising, sarcastic or ironic way.

Its become a bit of a family joke.

But I can see that given different people and circumstances that it would grate.

Reminds me when mine were little - those times when you literally can't even go for a poo in peace. Went to the toilet and as I wiping myself, toddler (who was toilet training) looked down and said "Good boy, Mummy!!" in an awestruck voice!!

@footle thank you, hope I'm doing this right as it wouldn't let me just reply to your comment. I've tried to create a new post but keeps saying no network or login, when I have logged in and have signal.

Depends on who they are, but I probably would be. You're a girl at school, a woman once you leave (if not before).

Blimey

Poor MIL
Damned if she does and if she don't by the sounds of it.