Block or rant??

[Gibbo387]

I met a guy five years ago when my son was very young. We moved in together quickly and during three years he changed his mind about wanting marriage and kids, he ended up resenting my son, was trying it on with my sister and my friends behind my back, lots of other stuff. (I didn’t know he was doing this until we split Altho I had had suspicions!)
I put a post on a group similar to this asking for advice because he just couldn’t get along with my son. Someone from the group screenshotted it and sent it to my ex, who was so angry that he asked me to pack me and my sons things and get out of his house.
I was so shocked and heartbroken I did as he said and left. My sons life was turned upside down.
I moved away and got my life together again.
I’ve had two years of therapy to get over the pain of this. My relationship just prior to this was really abusive in every way.
At the time I left I never told my ex how angry I was or that I knew about him and my sister I just kept everything bottled up and was civil when I saw him.
After two years of being split, I deleted his number from my phone last week. And he’s messaged me today! Asking how me and my son are and how are we doing, do I need the spare car keys that he still has at his house etc.
This has knocked me for six. I can’t stop shaking. I’m not sure whether to block him, be civil or give him a piece of my mind. I’ve always felt like I should’ve been honest with him about how much he hurt me and how much I know about what he did behind my back just so he knows that I know he isn’t this ‘good guy’ he pretends to be. When we split I was too scared to do that but now I’m conflicted about whether to let rip at him or not.

Block block block! He sounds like a twat.

I couldn’t have held my tongue this long tbh having said that it’s never seemed to help lol , people know who they are and how they treat people and I think they just bat off any attempt to it being pointed out to them and then you just end up feeling worse

So maybe ignore and block the prick might actually be better

Block!

See that’s the thing I’m not sure what I’m hoping to gain here. Part of me wants to really hurt him. And ignoring or blocking might do that? But I also wonder if telling him how I feel would help me just get all that out of me? All that anger and bitterness. I’m not expecting it to help him see the error of his ways I’m just wondering if it will help me heal? Because I’m clearly not over it when I’m this upset over a message two years later.

Don’t answer his text. Just block the number

Block

@Gibbo387 I love a rant because I'm petty. But I've also learnt that there is nothing worse than doing nothing.

Don't block. Don't reply. Do nothing.
He will probably message again. Then block.

He did what he did and didn't it care, telling him you know what he did won't do anything at all. It's to late in the day.

Block him; he won’t accept his behaviour and will make out you’re in the wrong and potentially make yourself feel worse. The fact that you haven’t replied will tell him everything he needs to know

I would just reply with a friend's address to send the key to before blocking.

Luckily I don’t need the car key as the car was scrapped last year 😂

Blocking him will be a greater punishment to him than any reply you could give him. Just be thankful all that's over now and you're away from him.

I would also block him but I do understand the urge to rip into someone and tell them exactly how their shit behaviour made you feel.
Assuming you don't need the key as its been so long I wouldn't reply, I'd bet that he's using the key to start a conversation with you and probably try and worm his way back in to your life.
Maybe write down whatever you would say in a text onto paper so it feels like you have got it off your chest.

"Asking how me and my son are and how are we doing, do I need the spare car keys that he still has at his house etc"

Response:
We are absolutely fantastic now we don't have you in our lives.

Then block - might help you feel better. Make sure you block on everything though.

Block him and move on x

If you ranted at him you hand over your power and he will be satisfied that he can emotionally trigger you even after 2 years.

Don’t give him the pleasure.

I hope that your DS is recovering from his ordeal of being resented and that you are stronger too.

I wonder if he has been watching you on WhatsApp or something and noticed that he couldn’t see your online activity after you deleted his number (not sure if that’s how it works?) - he may have thought you had blocked him - it seems v random coincidence to text you a week after you deleted his number?

I'd actually reply, simply saying
............erm, who is this ?

To him, it'll seem like you deleted his number (long ago) and are now not even thinking of him at all !

When he replies, saying ''it's Dickbrain'', you can say ''Erm...........I scrapped that car long ago, lol !

Then block him

It gives the appearance that you never think of him and have well and truly moved on with your life, to the point of blocking him being a bloody afterthought.

He had seen some of my WhatsApp stories which was the reason I deleted his number last week! It was obviously bothering him that he couldn’t now see what we’re up to so he reached out.
Thank you my son is so much happier and we have an amazing relationship now.
I feel like I waited so long for my ex to reach out hoping he would change and want me and my son to come back, but now finally I can see the pathetic worm he really is! How dare he think he can just contact me like that after two years!

Love these responses to him! Thank you all so much and I think it’s a unanimous agreement on blocking! Xx

"Car's in the scrapyard, you're welcome to join it there."

😂 love this

It's a cliche, but the opposite of love isn't hate - it's indifference.

This guy resented your actual child and tried it on with your sister, he obviously has some deep need for attention and drama. What a manchild.

Ranting gives the impression that you still care, even if you are angry. That's a win for him. Ignoring him says you don't give a fuck, he obviously wants your attention so don't give it!

Replying will lead him to believe you still care (even if it is because he thinks you hate him), indifference is the biggest weapon so ignore/block and get on with your life.

Why has he contact you now at all?. I would be highly suspicious of his motives.

Do not give him a response, to such people this is the reward. Block and delete. You owe this man nothing now, engaging with him at all opens a door that should otherwise remain closed.

Block and do not engage further.

Ignore 100% because it will open a dialogue!