Does being called 'sexy' make you cringe!? Also, how excited should I be at this stage?

[TwoAndMe]

It makes me cringe alot. I'm wondering if it makes anyone else feel like that?
Not just that, he has said he can't wait to kiss my sexy lips..
It's via texting. We have been texting back and forth for about 3 weeks. He then started adding 'sexy' into the messages. Morning sexy. Just got a message telling me how his day was and how he has had outdoor lights fitted for our dates at his house. Then again...asked 'how was your day sexy?'. I have ignored it up until now as it has been general chit chat. It's starting to make me feel a bit....I can't think of the word but I don't think about kissing his lips. He has said he can't wait to meet. I don't feel excited because I don't know him. If we had met a few times, I may feel excited.
He has also told me he has a camper van so start thinking about some nice places to visit.
Anyway, if he took out the sexy and wasn't future planning so much, it wouldn't feel so pressured. Am I being mean?

Hades has it!

Eeew he's a lovebombing creep. You sound lovely. I'd be telling him to do one and blocking with immediate effect xx

You don't owe him diddly-shit. Just delete/block him. No further communication needed.

Oh op. Sounds like someone i recently blocked
Does his first name begin with R ?
He had a camper van too. Had split with the ex and was planning to live in it

Full on guy ‘just wanted to make you happy’ and he ‘loved women’s hair ‘

There can’t be two of them

Sounds like a creep to me. Be more direct and blunt with anyone else you meet. Would be like to be called sexy lips , or would he find it a bit odd. He's been watching too much porn and isn't intelligent enough to know that porn isn't real.

@Sundance2741

It's awful. Makes you sound inter-changeable with any number of women, and not like a real person at all. Back on the day "Gorgeous" had the same effect on me.

Men also do this so they don't mix up names of the different women they may be involved it.

I think its sleezy.
Can't be arsed to call you by your name?
Bin.

@Heatherjayne1972

Oh op. Sounds like someone i recently blocked Does his first name begin with R ? He had a camper van too. Had split with the ex and was planning to live in it

Full on guy ‘just wanted to make you happy’ and he ‘loved women’s hair ‘

There can’t be two of them

Oh please let it be him.

Make your excuses and say goodbye.

Yak.

I smell socks with sandals and bushy shrimp.

I don’t object to “Sexy” from someone I find sexy myself! (But I use terms of endearment all the time, including “babe” which I know a lot of people don’t like). But clearly you don’t find him sexy, so I wouldn’t pursue it. Just send him a message saying you’ve changed your mind or started chatting to someone else and are pursuing that?

When I did OLD I did meet quite a few men who seemed ready to marry me without meeting me (and I am no great shakes) - I found this neediness unattractive.

Having said that, with the only one I finally ended up meeting, and who I am now still with, we did exchange some fairly sexually flirtatious late-night texts before meeting - I realise this would make us both a massive Red Flag for many people, but it was mutual, and we both enjoyed it......

So it’s horses for courses I think. There is no objectively right or wrong way to message someone (as long as your aren’t sexually harassing them or being abusive), but you need to pick a bloke who messages in a way you are comfortable with and find interesting/entertaining. This one clearly doesn’t do it for you.

I've just been chatting with a hot camper van guy on the fb dating site, seems like a nice guy, good looking, articulate, decent job, sense of humour etc, a few back and forth messages and a bit of a chat about what we're looking forward to after lockdown and he said 'shagging in my camper van, wanna help?'
Proper put me off.
if it was someone I was in a relationship with or building up to a sexual thing with ii might not have been so turned off but it was way too soon for me in our conversation to go straight to sex.
I was grateful though because at least I won't be wasting any time on him!

Why is everyone obsessed with camper vans.. is this some sort of primal urge that bang bus tapped into i wonder

I love camper vans too! When I was first chatting to my fella he wooed me with a picture of a camper-van he was intending to buy - I got so excited I forwarded the picture to my mom! He never even bought the bloody thing (he bought another, much worse one), but by then I was hooked!

Thanks for the messages 😊
I thought I'd let you all know that I'm no longer chatting to him. He eased off with the pet names but I had already lost interest. He was a bit stroppy when i told him. He did have a cute dog but his name began with S.
Anyway started chatting to someone else over the weekend. Yesterday, I had an early night as I had a busy few days at work and I woke up to a message saying 'I'm not happy with your lack of communication, good luck in your search'. I was so shocked. We had exchanged messages for a couple of days. Anyway, I explained I had an early night and had spoken to him in the morning but ok, no problem, you too! He then said, when I'm 'with' someone, I like to know they're thinking about me. Well, that was another shocker. I didn't realise I was 'with him'!
Anyway, at the same time, I'm chatting to another guy. So far so good but now I'm just awaiting what could possibly go wrong. I mean do you just concentrate on one person? Also, we can't travel so it's even more difficult as I don't want to be overly texting.
I don't want to not date as I feel life is going to be a little restricted for quite some time and it would be nice to meet someone.
Ps - I might buy my own camper van

No, I don't concentrate on one person. It takes ages to get to the point of meeting someone and everything before then is pretty meaningless, so don't waste time putting all eggs in one basket.

Good call on the “sexy” guy, OP - he didn’t sound like your type at all! As for the “lack of communication” man - what a total dick! At least you don’t have to waste any more time on him......

I think it’s fine to chat to a number, at least until you meet one (and some would carry on after that until you are clear it’s going to be a relationship - that’s personal choice). But until you have actually met up, certainly you owe them nothing.....

Funny you said that about buying your own camper van - I was actually thinking of posting and saying, if we all like them so much, why don’t we buy our own? Sadly I can neither afford one, nor drive.....

I think for me what makes it attractive is that is indicates the guy might be adventurous and a bit of a free spirit? It’s not just us - my best girlfriend, when she got with her current guy, first thing she couldn’t wait to tell me about was his camper!

Perhaps the OLD men know this and are simply pretending to have them?

Campervans are disgustingly expensive for one that won't break down half way to your destination.

This is true - the one my boyfriend actually ended up buying is a shocker - it barely goes and the interior is awful. I WILL go away in it (and and when this ever becomes possible), but only because I am a total dirty hippy who would sleep anywhere.......

There is definitely a disproportionate amount of guys online with campervans.
I guess it's an easy lie to make and easy to get a photo of.
There are also loads of guys who pose with other people's dogs which I find very strange!

I'm not happy with your lack of communication, good luck in your search

What a prim twit!

You’re doing well OP to get through this ....!

When I was OLD I always gave them a second chance after they wrote something a bit “off”. Never should’ve, it was only a matter of days before the next rudeness or weirdness

"Hi sexy" "You look sexy" "I think you're sexy" "Your lips are sexy" - bleurgh!!

I thought when I deleted OLD after 3 horrible weeks, I would never have to read these messages from thick/rough men again, but no, they have discovered FB and send randoms like me the "sexy" messages!

I've tried to think who might find these messages from strangers or near strangers complimentary. Maybe someone who works as a prostitute, or an erotic dancer? But it must be a limited field of responsiveness.

In reality, its just a mass spamming of use of the sexy words to sift out the few women who do respond positively to being objectified by total strangers.

Great summary Greenland!