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Relationships

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How many women do this?

97 replies

Twinkles23 · 12/01/2021 17:32

How often do you prepare meals a day for your partner?
I’ve been told tonight that some women prepare meals 4 times a day for their partner. We’ve had a huge argument over it. Surely this isn’t correct? I’ve told him this isn’t the 1950s anymore. I make him lunch and sometimes dinner if he wants it. He usually doesn’t. But now apparently I should be.

OP posts:
Giraffey1 · 12/01/2021 20:22

My STBExH did nearly all the cooking. For all his many faults, he insisted on doing it as he had now job and I was always out working long hours.

So my answer is zero!

OnlyTeaForMe · 12/01/2021 20:25

Four of us in the house - Me, DH and two young adult DSs

We all get our own breakfasts
We all get our own lunches. Sometimes I'll make some soup or homemade pizza in which case it's for whoever wants it.
DH and I used to do alternate lunches when DSs were in school, but I got hacked off as I'd make nice toasted sandwiches/omlette,pizza, soup, "naice" bread sandwich (sour dough w/ avocado etc) and every single time it was his turn I'd get a dry cheese and pickle or ham and mustard sandwich with crisps, so I said lets just get our own. Now I still make the nice things for me and he looks all pouty about it - tough!

We have a family rota for cooking evening meals, so I do one every 3 days.

TonMoulin · 12/01/2021 20:35

I do none of them.

We all get our own breakfast.
DH is doing all the other meals.

TonMoulin · 12/01/2021 20:38

Btw the arrangement he is wanting is what my PIL. They are extremely old fashioned there.

He is trying his luck and is wanting to see how far he can push. Don’t accept that. Next it will be you doing all the hw, parenting and what not. You’re not his servant

AnnaSW1 · 12/01/2021 20:49

I don't prepare any other than maybe a Sunday brunch

SomewhatBored · 12/01/2021 20:51

Almost never. My husband does the cooking in my house. Occasionally I will make something for both of us but the only time I cook/prepare food for him is if he's ill.

wibblewombat · 12/01/2021 20:54

I do the main meal, all the bread and any cakes. Make sure meals are good but only the one a day...

We're both mostly retired.

10kstepsaroundthegardenthen · 12/01/2021 21:04

Everyone does there own breakfast and lunch, apart from the odd occasion when there's is a cooked breakfast or cheese on toast etc.
I generally cook dinner.
Dh does the washing and ironing and everyone does the dishwasher.

Everyone else's wife cooks for them is so juvenile an argument.

Pyewhacket · 12/01/2021 21:04

I haven’t prepared a meal since March but then I don’t eat much. When I get home I Just sleep in bites of an hour at a time and then wake up with the sound of a woman screaming , happens all the time now. We’ve been told we’ll get PTSD counselling when this is over. I’ll do all the cooking then.

Skyla2005 · 12/01/2021 21:31

Never ever made him a packed lunch
Only make him dinner if I am cooking for the whole family If we are all doing our own then I won’t do his I only do mine. His not a child he is capable of looking after himself !

FolkAreWeird · 12/01/2021 21:58

Never! DH does all the cooking in this house (and the dishes).

6demandingchildren · 12/01/2021 22:07

DH makes breakfasts, we all make our own lunches and either one will make kids dinner or they make it, and we generally make our own dinner was we are on different eating plans.

Bluesmartiesandpandapop · 12/01/2021 22:14

I don't even make my kids 4 meals a day... not even the toddler Shock

DownstairsMixUp · 12/01/2021 22:23

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

ALittleBitConfused1 · 12/01/2021 22:30

I used to when I was married. Not four times a day but I definitely did his lunch and dinner. We had no children together and I had a teenage son. We worked different shifts and I ate breakie and lunch at work then cooked when I got home, by which point he still had another, 4 hours at work. So I'd cook and make my dinner while prepping my breakie and lunch to take in the next day. It was easier to cook his dinner at the same time so he had something to heat. If he wanted something quick that couldn't be heated I'd bung it in the oven 20 minutes before he was due home. So while I was doing my food it was easier to do his lunch to take to work for him too. It also saved the kitchen having to be cleaned twice an evening, money as it was cheaper than him grabbing food on the run and meant as soon as he got home we could catch up on each others day rather than him spending an hour cooking and clearing up.
It worked for us but tbh he used to do other bits in the morning before he started work (he started later than me) that saved me having to spend an hour hanging clothes up or hoovering when I got in. Like I said, worked for us.
Weekends I used to do all cooking but I liked it and he was crap at it.

PaigeMatthews · 12/01/2021 22:38

I rarely cook when dh is in. I dont enjoy it. Eating isnt some pleasurable experience for me, it is a necessity. Dh does all the food shopping too. Ive no interest in the technicalities of food prep. My MIL cooks us two meals a week too. So this wife certainly doesnt cook four meals a day. Unless by meal you mean bag if crisps...

Timeforredwine · 12/01/2021 22:45

My husband works full time I'm at home, I get up each day make tea and cooked breakfast sometimes, make packed lunch for work and also do food for children. Make 3 or 4 dinners night. Husband happy to do a few dinners too and at weekend. Weekend he will do me a brek in bed.

CherryBlossomTree7 · 12/01/2021 22:46

You're not his slave.

He should prepare his own breakfast (i.e. cereal, toast or the like), unless you're eating together in which case if it's toast, someone should do it for everyone (not necessarily you). He should prepare his own lunch too.

Because you work part time, you should prepare some dinners. But you are homeschooling, so he should also do his fair share of dinners.

I would find his laziness and lack of desire to cook for you very unattractive.

Wearywithteens · 12/01/2021 22:54

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn at the poster's request.

mindutopia · 12/01/2021 23:00

I cook dinner most nights for all of us (me, dh and 2 dc). I like to cook and cooking is my time out each day. I can’t think of any time in well over a decade that I’ve made Dh a meal that wasn’t like a family meal I was making for all of us. Maybe on occasion if he was really ill and couldn’t get out of bed? But he’s an adult, he sorts his own breakfasts and lunches. And I only cook dinner if I’m home that day and really want to.

My mum on the other hand prepares 2 weeks of breakfast, lunch and dinner and freezes it, if she’s away because apparently my stepdad who is perfectly well and able just can’t make his own jacket potato. She even orders takeaway and portions it out for him, because he is too pampered to order it himself. Hmm

BrummyMum1 · 12/01/2021 23:16

Just put up a big sign in the kitchen saying “this cafe is closed as the cafe manager has been furloughed in order to home school her children full time.“ Sorry but your husband sounds like a raving misogynist.

anothernamereally · 12/01/2021 23:59

I usually do evening meal as dc are little and like to eat early - I finish work earlier than dh, now he's wfh it's a more even split though. Lunch we usually sort ourselves although I'll ask him if he wants anything if I'm doing mine and he's in the kitchen- he does the same for me

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