I'm mid 40's divorced and I've been in a 2 year relationship with someone I've known all of my life and our families remained very close although I moved away so had only sporadic contact. Seemed great and he's a lovely man and has been really romantic and loving. He's in a bubble with me so every weekend he has bed and breakfast (actually full English, and a Sunday roast:) ) then back to work. Over new year there was some facetime chit chat where someone mentioned marriage light heartedly but he was immediately oh no that's not happening etc...I found it insulting to be honest. As if he was a catch and I was some desperado he didn't want getting the wrong idea. I let it lie but I could feel it irking me and I don't like to become passive aggressive so I mentioned it a week or so later. He told me it's not on the cards as "it has to mean something" and that he does believe in it but only if you find the right person but that he loves me so he's no longer looking. Now this sounds very pragmatic but all along he has been so romantic to the extent where I had thought he was kind of getting off on the romance and being such a sensitive soul that it did feel sometimes that it was a lot of words and also more about him enjoying a great romance while I did all the caring things like coffee in bed, cooking lovely meals, making plans to boost him over lockdown. I do feel deflated and a bit of a mug! Now I feel like I want to ask the reasons why not and where this is going...but then I do feel like a desperado. So...do I sound like one?