Not sure why i'm asking this as it may already be irrelevant but it's bugging me so here it is.
Bit of history first.......When i met dp he had his own house but as he was in the process of a divorce he had to sell it. He had a lot of debt and couldn't get another mortgage and so we moved in to a rented house together which was all fine no probs.
When Dd1 was 10mths old he managed to get a mortgage (didn't have me on it as i have bad debt too) and we moved to live in the road i grew up in, in which my dad and brothers still live.
I was ecstatic, loved the house despite it needing work, and loved the fact that i was so close to family and friends.
After a while i became pregnant again and we had Dd2. Shortly before her birth Dp came home saying that the factory he worked in had offered him voluntary redundancy. He was in no means being forced to take it as there were loads that went for it, but because he had been there for 23 years we knew he would be offered a largish amount. As soon as he told me i said that he could only really consider it if he knew he had another job to go to and he agreed. We decided we needed to talk about it some more but the next day he came home and told me he had told them he wanted to take the offer.
I was gobsmacked and really upset but he reassured me that he would start looking for another job staright away.
Anyway basically he didn't and shortly after dd2 was born he left. At this point he still wasn't looking for work and so i asked him to at least pay off some of our debt with the mioney and do the house up a bit so that if the worst came to the worst we could sell the house.
He agreed, infact promised and then did the exact opposite. He wasted the money, even brought an old porsche.
Eventually we lost the house, and i walked around our local area for 3 hours one day trying to find somewhere for us to move to. Dp again did nothing.
I eventually found us a house which was in a crappy area and more in rent than our mortgage had been but that was all i could find. I was desperate not to be in the house when it was reppossed.
We stayed in the rebted house for 6 mths whilst i fought for a housing asscoaition flat which we eventually got. I should have called it a day then and moved in on my won with the dd's but i decided to let him come to.
As you provbably know we have now moved from the flat to a house as we have Ds too.
Anyway dp resents the fact that i still haven't forgiven him for what happened with the house.
I am still very angry and upset about it as i was heartbroken to have to leave and am angry that he obviously thought so little of me and the kids to do that to us.
He reckons i should get over it. It was about 4 years ago now, so is he right, should i get over it ???