Partner obsessed with QAnon

[Anon778833]

Although he says he doesn’t align himself with QAnon, all his views are the same as theirs.

He thinks Trump is a good man and the election was a fraud etc. He thinks Covid is a hoax etc.

Lately,he has been almost constantly on his phone talking to other Q Bots. Usually on LinkedIn. He even talks to them on the phone. We have a 1 year old child. I am so sick of it. Not just that he is talking nonsense but that he’s now spoiling our Christmas.

He is self employed and has earned no money in the last month due to watching videos about this topic all the time. I myself have autism and I get depressed about this. He spent the last two days rushing about getting any old Christmas presents for people because he’s online all the time reading about The Storm. And other such nonsense.

If I ask him to put his phone down, he accuses me of being controlling and says F you etc.

Is anyone else experiencing this from a family member?

I'm not, but a lot of people are. It's been a very scary year and people like to reach out for something that they feel have answers. However implausible, unrealistic or downright dodgy those answers might be.

How you respond to this is entirely up to you. Swearing at you isn't OK under any circumstances, and if your morals and ethics are so far apart, then you may not have a future as a couple.

I'd be concerned about his views on COVID, because they mean he is likely to do stupid things which put your health and your family's health at risk. For me that would be a deal breaker.

Ultimately it's up to you whether you want to stay in this relationship, but from where I stand you have sound reasons to leave.

I agree with you - I think people can’t cope with the reality of the pandemic and the life changes we’ve all had to make. I have no idea whether he’s going to stop thinking this way.

I feel so sorry for you.
If my DH or adult DCs went down this route I would feel like moving out because I could not put up with the crap that QAnon breeds.
Does he smoke weed because the two tend to go hand in hand.

I think the fact that he thinks its acceptable to swear at you like that is a huge problem too.

You know you can decide it isnt good enough and walk away if you want. Not really sure what about him is worth staying for.

I had a friend who was obsessed with weird and wonderful theories to the point that it was obsessional. Things about Aliens, Anunnaki (gods of some sort), time travellers, conspiracies...His mental health started to decline and he became very strange in all aspects of life. He also became very rude to everyone.

How is your partners mental health in general? Does he normally speak to you like that?

No he doesn’t smoke weed but he’s had precious mental health issues.

Do him a favour and ask them why they conveniently forgot that Trump was meant to be arresting all these celebrities and becoming eternal president. Also why do they completely blank his friendship with Epstein and various accusations of sexual abuse?

How can anybody possibly think Trump is a good man though? how can you have any respect for somebody who thinks this?

I think the fact he says hes not alligned with the Q anon lot is worse, hes designed it so when they get it all wrong he can twist it and so they wernt quite his beliefs. Narcissists are attracted to these theories, and people with personality disorders

Have you posted about him before?

How can anybody possibly think Trump is a good man though? how can you have any respect for somebody who thinks this?

I don’t - it sickens me tbh.

@user1471565182

Do him a favour and ask them why they conveniently forgot that Trump was meant to be arresting all these celebrities and becoming eternal president. Also why do they completely blank his friendship with Epstein and various accusations of sexual abuse?

How can anybody possibly think Trump is a good man though? how can you have any respect for somebody who thinks this?

Reason doesn't work with these people.

Did you post before about him not wanting your child to be vaccinated?

Regardless, sorry you're having such a hard time. Your partner either won't or can't put his family ahead of his obsession. This doesn't just get better.

I think the truth wrt Trump is that people who follow this narrative actually respect his vile, disgusting behaviour and personality.

www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p08wxtb3

This should help. Have a google of the BBC disinformation project. Mainly it’s about insecurity and anxiety that attracts people to hang on something that in uncertain times. The recommendation is not to blast them back with facts but to ask them Qs so that they trip over the holes themselves. But that’s up to you have much effort you want to put into this.

Google Marianna Spring - she has done lots of research on QAnon, types of people attracted to conspiracies etc for the BBC.

@emptyplinth I’ve not posted about vaccination but he is of course, anti it and doesn’t want our daughter to have any vaccines.

Honestly? I couldn't stay with someone like this. Especially with a child.

He's not earned anything because of his obsession? That's pretty damn serious.

I think you need to treat this as if he has joined cult, because essentially that's what it is.

Yes it is a cult. He’s usually a workaholic so for him not to be working that certainly is very unusual. Thanks for the links.

Does he smoke weed because the two tend to go hand in hand.

Thanks for giving me a good laugh!!

Nobody I know who smokes it, me included would not dream of supporting those dangerous weirdos.

Sorry OP. I would be looking at a future without him.

I’ve not experienced from my husband but a friend has turned to this. It’s very depressing because we used to be really close but I’m avoiding him now. It’s just constant ranting. It’s upsetting. I couldn’t have this in my house to be honest. I’d have to move out or make him move out. What’s “The Storm”?

On a slightly different topic several elderly relatives became like this about Brexit. When you got into conversation I realised the main common factor was they all had acute anxiety, found modern ways of doing things difficult, didn’t embrace technology and were looking at the past with rose tinted glasses. It wasn’t so
Much the EU they hated as ‘their life as it was now’ . I think any very stressful periods finds some people gravitating to cults, conspiracy theories etc. Personally I would be having none of it and if it persists would be ending it

The ‘constant ranting’ resonates with me too. It’s so boring. He’s got a completely one track mind now.

I bought dd some little Grinms toys wooden people and her dad says they look like people wearing face masks.

The Storm, I think is the supposed event where Trump arrests all the pedophiles and satanists (usually celebrities and politicians from the democrat party in the US). Which of course won’t happen for many reasons.

Luckily we don’t live together. I let him come for Christmas because I felt bad for him to be by himself. Only because he’s my daughters father.

What were his previous mental health issues? My friend, as I mentioned earlier, got so involved in these obsessions that he ended up becoming isolated from everyone because he just couldn’t talk about anything else. He was diagnosed with a personality disorder eventually but only after a massive mental health breakdown sadly.

I’m so glad you don’t live together.

If he's on her birth certificate he could make trouble for you with regards to your DD's vaccinations. Has she had her newborn ones? If he's an antivaxxer, I'd get the hell out of there.