How to put my foot down (Covid/Christmas)

[MizMoonshine]

I'm not here for Covid police, just assistance with how to get my point across.

My partner, children and I live with my mother. We (as a family) care for my grandmother.
For Christmas this year, after the 3 house bubble came about we plan on having the 25th with my family (us, the kids, mum, my two siblings and their partners and nan).

Makes sense as we live here and that's what mum is going to do regardless of whether we are here or not.

We live in Wales, DPs family live in Hertfordshire. Our baby was born in August and his family have seen her once. He's missed birthdays and just seeing his family in general.

DP desperately wants to see his family this Christmas. And they want to see him too. He wants for all of us to visit after Christmas Day, as do his family.

I don't want to do this. It's not in compliance with restrictions and it is fucking dumb considering we are from different high risk areas.

How do I gently put my foot down? I understand how he feels, I don't want to be hurtful. Again, I'm not here for the Covid police. I'm looking for a way to gently list him down. I don't need convincing that it's a bad idea, I'm already of that mind set.

Talked to DP. He's on board, as long as we keep it fair by staying within restrictions at home. He doesn't seem to think I'm a monster for holding off on seeing his family until we're in a safer position. We are looking at going for a walk with them before Christmas and making sure they get their gifts.

Wow can't believe the number of posters basically suggesting OP should break the rules and put her family at risk. I disagree that OP is being unfair to her boyfriend. Clearly, if these were normal times, they would be seeing much more of the boyfriend's family and that would be the fair thing to do, but the whole point is that it's not normal times! And it's not like they'll never see the grandchild again. Her mum lives with them so of course OP's family will see much more of the baby etc.

Also as a mother with a new baby, it's normal that having your own mum/family around more takes precedence since you're naturally much more comfortable with your own mother/family during this vulnerable time of having a newborn/tiny baby, who can help with new baby etc. and you don't have to worry about "hosting" like you would do with in-laws. There's the big risk of this boyfriend bringing back Covid to their household, where OP's mother is particularly at risk of serious illness and death. I also wouldn't want to be exposing a 4 month old to more Covid risk than is necessary! OP is absolutely right to put her foot down. If he carries on like this OP , perhaps ask him how he would feel if your mum (or someone else in your household) contracted Covid and ended up seriously ill or passing away because that's literally what were talking about here. There's no guarantee either that just because any of you are not in a vulnerable group, you won't get serious covid or be among the many people with 'long' covid which is very debilitating.

Just saw your update OP. A socially distanced outside walk sounds like a good compromise