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Original poster

Do you get on with your OH mum?

45 replies

prawntoastie · 09/12/2020 17:37

if not how does it effect your relationship

I'm going through this now. We have broken up and now I'm alone at xmas, I was not invited to her house. My dad doesn't like people round on xmas and my mum is not alive. Usually do spend it alone, at least this year I have a dog.

OP posts:
Hotpinkangel19 · 09/12/2020 17:44

Yes I do, she's lovely.

katy1213 · 09/12/2020 17:45

That's sad - but if you've broken up, she's hardly likely to invite you for Christmas. Your dad sounds a real misery, though!

merrygoround51 · 09/12/2020 17:45

Yes, she’s lovely

Summerstorms · 09/12/2020 17:48

Why would you be invited if you have broken up?

Pinkiii · 09/12/2020 17:49

Did you break up because she didn’t invite you?

How long were you together?

Aprilx · 09/12/2020 17:49

Never met her. But get along fine with his dad and stepmum.

JorisBonson · 09/12/2020 18:07

She's alright.

Dillydallyingthrough · 09/12/2020 18:11

She's ok, we have different views on most things but neither of us are rude, or ram our views down each others throats. I'm pretty sure she doesn't think I'm good enough for her son, but I think she recognises no-one would be! If you and your DP have broken up why would she invite you round? Or did you break up because she didn't invite you?

Original poster
prawntoastie · 09/12/2020 19:20

I wasn't invited before we broke up, it actually is what started the argument me being excluded

OP posts:
Original poster
prawntoastie · 09/12/2020 19:21

two years together, living together, planning a child

OP posts:
Bogiesaremyonlyfriend · 09/12/2020 19:28

Very much so. She would pick me over him if we broke up I'm sure!!

NotanotherboxofFrogs · 09/12/2020 19:33

She is one of my best friends, in non covid times we often go out for a night leaving the men at home

AuntyCandthefishfingersandwich · 09/12/2020 19:52

Honestly if he wouldn't ask his mum to include you at Christmas so you wouldn't be alone then you are better off having not stayed with him.

She didn't see you as part of the family and nor did he.

Sorry you are alone.

Pre COVID my church used to have Christmas dinner in the hall for anyone on their own.

Santaisironingwrappingpaper · 09/12/2020 19:56

My mil was fine until we had a dc.
She dumped us all!!
Confused
Nearly 6 years now.
Mind boggling!!

TheHobbitMum · 09/12/2020 19:59

I love my MIL like a mum, we have been on weekends away together with DH and enjoy each others company, she is a best friend of mine.

I'm sorry you are going through a rough time, it sounds like you are better off without them all. I hope you can enjoy Christmas still Flowers

RealLifeHotWaterBottle · 09/12/2020 20:01

Honestly if he wouldn't ask his mum to include you at Christmas so you wouldn't be alone then you are better off having not stayed with him.

Pretty much this. The issue sounds to be more about him than his mum.

Im really sorry you're facing Christmas alone (though on the face of it, best off without a rubbish partner). Do you have friends or less immediate family members close by you might bubble with?

Figgyboa · 09/12/2020 20:05

Yes, she's a lovely women.

Spottyspottyladybird · 09/12/2020 20:05

I dont at all. I have no issue with her but she seems to go out her way to avoid me. I wish I was close to my MIL though it would make life easier!

Sorry you'll be alone. Maybe try and make it special in your own way - have your favourite foods and watch a good film. I agree with previous posters - sounds like you're better off without him.

MrsBeltane · 09/12/2020 21:01

I get on with her on a superficial level, I have learned to just keep smiling. She is an extremely bizarre woman, the living embodiment of the Daily Mail.
I have disagreed with her over the years and she has really upset me. I let it go to keep the peace. I did tell DH about a year after we got together that one day I will tell her to fuck off. We've been together for 24 years and it hasn't happened yet, but there's still time.

PrincessNutNutRoast · 09/12/2020 21:04

Yes, she considers me a daughter and has secretly told me I'm the only one of her children's spouses that she's never had any doubts about.

AriesTheRam · 09/12/2020 21:15

Ye I do but I prefer her in small doses tbh.She pisses me off coz she only rings dh if she wants him to do her a favour,never for general catch up.

AriesTheRam · 09/12/2020 21:15

My ex mil was brilliant though

letsnotscaretheneighbours · 09/12/2020 21:18

Mil is pretty good. She is a bit of a Facebook stalker though and does bleat on about my husbands ex but its only because she's retired and bored and got naff all else to do.

Oldbutstillgotit · 09/12/2020 23:23

Hated my first MIL ( feeling was mutual) but adored DH’s Mum. She was everything my own Mum wasn’t. She used to tell DH how lucky he was to have me!
She died just before her 100 birthday and I still miss her 8 years later .

Mrsmummy90 · 09/12/2020 23:51

My MIL is lovely. Obviously as with any form of relationship, there are things that bother me but on the whole she's fab and we get on well.
She adores the DC so I make the effort to keep her in the loop of their day to day lives and make sure she sees them and speaks to them a lot.