Is it important to be educated to similar levels?

[HelloMellowYellow]

Do you think it matters if you have a masters or higher and the person you are dating hasn't even got O levels?

Would a relationship like that last once the sex and passion died down?

No it's not important but similar levels of intelligence are. I am educated to Oxbridge doctorate level and my partner has no qualifications. However, he comes from a different country, is significantly older and left school to be an entrepreneur. He is very clever and can match me in intelligence very well.

Agree with PP, it’s not about qualifications, it’s about general intelligence and outlook on life. I don’t have anything higher than A levels but have dated someone with a PHD before and we had huge amounts in common. Without wanting to toot my own horn I’m naturally intelligent and curious about the world around me, I like deep discussions and debates about ethics and social issues, and I’ve met highly educated people who may be able to pass exams but in everyday life are frankly a bit thick.

I think a similar work-ethic is very important

I agree work ethnic and your drive in life and what you want to do is what it’s about.

No it doesn’t matter. Life goals and work ethic might be a leveller.

I think having the same/similar moral compass is far more important than matching educationally.

I think similar intelligence levels and common goals are important. I also think that education level disparity can be a very real problem if one person has a chip on their shoulder, or an over inflated ego, relating to educational attainments.

DH has a single GSCE which he got as an adult and I have post grad qualifications. Been married for 33 years.
He has loads of good qualities- he’s very sharp witted , can fix almost anything, very good with figures and words and a hard worker, does more than his share round the house and with the kids. We also have similar attitudes to money and politics and he makes me laugh a lot.

So no, it didn’t matter to us. The important part is does it matter to you?

A similar outlook on life, shared values and sense of humour are all more important to me than educational attainment.

I have a ba, person I'm dating dropped outa highschool. But am pretty sure that if anything, he is smarter than me. I think similar intelligence is desirable. But intellegence and educational attainment isnt always the same thing.

I'd say it depends. I'm fairly well educated and my husband, while very intelligent, did not go to university - well he did but dropped out after a few weeks. After a while I really noticed it.

That probably has more to do with the industry he works in though (rough/macho) than his lack of higher education. I have found myself over the years wishing he'd stuck with it.

Ha Ha, you must have a poor marriage if the sex and passion has dried up.
A good marriage is that, I had no qualifications not even CSE and dh a grammar school education and degree. I gained a degree much later in life but 30 years later can't say as it's ever crossed our minds.

Always marry your intellectual equal. Always. Education is an indicator of that, but not an absolute guide (although realistically how many super-intelligent entrepreneurs with no qualifications, of the type mentioned in a post upthread, can there really be?)

I'm educated to Master's level. I could happily be with someone who'd never been to uni but I don't think I could be with someone who didn't have the ability and potential to pass a degree. Whether they're formally educated or not is less important but a huge disparity in raw intelligence would be a turn off.

Not at all. How you were at 16 or 18 is not how you are in middle age or later life.

I think education level often does correlate with outlook and values. If you meet someone who does match you well with outlook and values but not education level I don't think it matters but if you are looking for an online dating filter to save time it's not an unreasonable one.

I have a master's degree from Cambridge and my husband is an ex professional footballer with a few qualifications.

My husband is hands down far brighter than I am and his IQ I'm certain is far superior to mine!

My husband is self made and now works in business and does incredibly well for himself and I'm so proud of his work ethic.

My husband is interested in everything and we both love to learn about the world, history, politics and always have interesting conversations. And we're always learning from each other.

More so we share the same values in life and this is key.

We both value education so much and my husband would like to do a degree one day and he'll smash it.

I’m studying for a masters and my partner’s highest GCSE grade was a D. We’re very happy and he’s my favourite person to spend time with.

I think succeeding at exams and traditional academia isn’t always a measure of intelligence so much as a very specific set of skills- memorising, analysing and regurgitating information in a particular way. He doesn’t judge me for not being able to string a guitar or cook a steak, I don’t see why I should judge him because he can’t bash out an essay on Ovid in 3 hours.

I don't think having similar education levels matters at all - some people have better opportunities/access to higher education than others - it doesn't make them any more intelligent. I have more than one degree but DH left school at 16. He was absolutely capable of going to university had his parents pushed him a bit more, gone to a school with more ambition for Him, been able to afford it etc.

Similar work ethic though is 1000% more important. I don't care DH doesn't have a degree but we've fallen out soooo many times about his lack of work ethic

Yes, you've hit the nail on the head. It's the 'could they get a degree had they had the opportunity or inclination to do so?' test.
Guy is really good in bed, really keen... perhaps, too keen.. but conversation is so shallow and reasoning very weak. His lack of education shows and I feel so snobby saying this. I'd have him as a FWB but he wants more and I feel bad about this because we can't have a good conversation which puts me off a future with him.
He's also dismissive of higher education because he's become a successful businessman despite it.

From the majority of your replies I guess the message is yes but if you have other important things in common and a few of you think nah
Thank you.

I was Oxbridge educated, my OH is a builder with no academic qualifications (just technical). He is not bookish/intellectual and has no interest in being so, but he is more intelligent, curious, witty, charismatic and stimulating than any other man I’ve had a relationship with (especially the arrogant, mansplaining Oxbridge types, one of whom was also physically abusive).
We had similar working class upbringings (just different aspirations at 16-18) and share the same tastes, cultural interests and a shared moral compass. I’m so much happier than I have been with so-called educational equals. But you know, whatever works for you.

Having said all that OP, if this bloke is shallow, dismissive and isn’t great conversation, it’s dead in the water.
I’ve ended it with men more qualified than me for simply that reason. A cerebral spark is what drives that sense of companionship and that’s essential for when the sex goes quiet.

although realistically how many super-intelligent entrepreneurs with no qualifications, of the type mentioned in a post upthread, can there really be?

Absolutely loads. I really don't think it's that much of a rarity. I can think of five people off the top of my head who I know (some family, some old family friends) who are very successful business owners and millionaires, all of whom left school at 16. I think FIL actually left at 15. Conversely there are a couple of people springing to mind who have degrees but are definitely not especially intelligent.

Lack of conversation isn't necessarily a deal breaker - some people just aren't the talkative type. I spend all day talking as part of a challenging job and don't really want to get into philosophical or political or in-depth discussions with DH when I get home. More than happy to talk about what rubbish on TV or general gossip.

I have a degree in child psychology along with several other qualifications, my partner has no qualifications and barely scrapped through cse's however we are both hardworking, have the same sense of humour and outlook on life and have been happy together for 10yrs